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DH and menstruation cup

(141 Posts)
Booboostwo Mon 19-Sep-16 20:16:05

I am honestly not sure if BU, but happy to acknowledge I might be if everyone thinks so.

A couple of years back I bought a menstruation cup (after reading threads on here), freaked at its size and promptly hid it in a cupboard. Then I read a blog that urged readers to put their brave pants on and try the bloody thing out since they had already bought it, so I did. Turns out it is brilliant! I've always felt very uncomfortable with tampons and have a reaction to sanitary towels but menstrual cups are just wonderful. Shame I am close to the menopause really.

To the BU bit...I tried discussing all this with DH and he said it was disgusting and he didn't want to hear anything about it. I didn't offer to show him the cup or how it works, just wanted to rave about how great it was. Did I have to? Well maybe not, but why not? I've discovered a wonderful product and wanted to share with him and frankly I am a bit insulted he finds talking about menstruation so disgusting. For the record I have inspected his anal fistula when it was healing after his operation without making him feel in any way self-conscious or upset, and have put medication on seven verrucas he had on his feet (feet, bliah!) which he had allowed to become enormous because he'd ignored them for months. DH and I talk about anything, this is the first time he has refused to talk about something.

rhiaaaaaaaannon Mon 19-Sep-16 20:17:52

Yabu a bit.
I don't mind talking about periods, poo etc but dh hates it so I respect his wishes.

Passthecake30 Mon 19-Sep-16 20:19:01

Hmmmm. Maybe you've knocked yourself off your pedastal as he didn't know you had periods/pooed/wee'd etc like everyone else. I'd continue grossing him out grin

WhereTheFuckIsWonderWoman Mon 19-Sep-16 20:19:33

YABa little U
I've only talked about mine when I'm pissed but I know DP isn't a fan so I'm not going to push it or make a song and dance about it. Is it really that big a deal?

FindoGask Mon 19-Sep-16 20:20:34

You inspected his anal fistula! For sure he should indulge you this once in a bit of enthusing. As you said, it's not like you wanted to give him a demonstration.

Notfastjustfurious Mon 19-Sep-16 20:20:39

I don't think you ABU given your history. You looked at his bum hole ffs!

While I'm here though please rave to me about how wonderful it is I've been thinking about getting one recently. How often does it need emptied?

Waffles80 Mon 19-Sep-16 20:21:34

My OH is delighted about mine - mainly because it's making periods so much more bearable, and consequently making me less miserable when I have mine.

As with you, I just wanted someone to hear about its brilliance. He humours me because that's what a partner does.

Your DH is being weird.

TaliDiNozzo Mon 19-Sep-16 20:21:47

On the fence here.

I wouldn't tell someone it was disgusting but I don't think I'd want to hear about it either.

Mybeardeddragonjustdied2016 Mon 19-Sep-16 20:23:06

You touched his feet???

He should be offering to put the cup in and take it out and wash it for you!!

Lillagroda Mon 19-Sep-16 20:24:14

Same here. My biological functions are icky, apparently. I leave it uncovered in the bathroom if I fancy making a point. Of course his athlete's foot is fine to show me. Grim.

It's awesome. Light flow so only have to empty at the max interval (12 hours). On, not on, meh, just the same these days. Marvellous thing.

rhiaaaaaaaannon Mon 19-Sep-16 20:24:28

I assume you didn't inspect his anal fistula for a laugh, it was because he needed you to?
The same logic applies here.

sentia Mon 19-Sep-16 20:24:36

He is being a bit odd to put a blanket embargo on talking about it. I would get not sharing your enthusiasm but why can't you talk about it? I'd keep bringing it up (but I'm childish like that).

dybil Mon 19-Sep-16 20:25:12

I don't think YABU.

I'm male, my partner uses a menstrual cup and finds it great. I actually recommended one to a close female friend, who was staying with us, recently (she'd wanted to go swimming but bad timing with her period).

Unless he's generally squeamish about blood, which some people are, I think he was being a bit childish.

LeonardInTheArgosBag Mon 19-Sep-16 20:25:34

How can he be grossed out about that? Presumably you're just telling him about it, not showing him. After the anal thing he should be grateful you're still able to look him in the eye!

Waffles80 Mon 19-Sep-16 20:25:58

notfast they're brilliant!! So much more convenient, comfortable and definitely cheaper.

I change mine every six hours on day one, and then eight for the other days. Sometimes use a light pad for the final day.

My period pain is less intense and, if it's not giving you too much information, I don't get such discomfort around my vagina and vulva. Something about tampons used to make me incredibly achey/throbby.

Had it for six months now. Not a month has gone passed without me enthusing to anyone who will listen about how brilliant it is.

My sister has had one for years and just eye rolls at me when I mention it because she has been telling me for years to stop whinging about my periods and get one.

CrohnicallyAspie Mon 19-Sep-16 20:26:57

I'm another menstrual cup lover. I've also shown my arse to DH in a non-sexual way (I thought I had a fistula). And I still think you're being U, because it seems a bit unnecessary! I mean, if I had a problem with it and needed his help I'd expect him to suck it up and help without moaning about it being disgusting. But as a topic of conversation?

PS notfast I can get away with emptying mine in the morning, once in the middle of the day and then again at night. Not particularly heavy periods but at my heaviest it's maybe 1/2 full at that. So I never really need to use any toilet other than my own to empty.

Rachcakes Mon 19-Sep-16 20:29:03

Just tell him how much money you'll save. That'll pique his interest.

AnchorDownDeepBreath Mon 19-Sep-16 20:29:19

Hmmm... I'm female and find the idea of a menstual cup kinda gross. I know they are good for the environment and people find them more comfortable, but I'm just not there yet. Tampons suit me much better right now and I wouldn't really want to have a conversation about cups. Presumably you felt the same when it was hidden in your cupboard?

You may have touched his feet and looked at his arse, but presumably you didn't mind? He does.

BaggyCheeks Mon 19-Sep-16 20:30:21

YANBU to be enthusiastic. I got one recently and it's the best money I've ever spent, and I don't feel that I'm exaggerating.

sparechange Mon 19-Sep-16 20:31:43

DH was a bit confused at my evangelism, tbh. I don't think he could really empathaise or comprehend why I was waxing lyrical.

It's probably a bit like when he gets a new pair of running trainers and give me a metre by metre account of trying them out, or does a new exercise routine in the gym and needs to tell me in granular detail. I wouldn't say I ban talk of it, but I can't say I am overly interested in what he has to say or am making notes on his product recommendations

We are both sporners though, so I know it isn't a squeamish thing

BearFoxBear Mon 19-Sep-16 20:33:36

He's being really weird. My husband thinks it's brilliant, calls it my chuff chalice haha!

Wrinklytights Mon 19-Sep-16 20:34:41

Yanbu. I'd be a bit offended if my DH found my periods 'disgusting'. However, this thread makes me a bit sad that I couldn't get on with my cup (leaked) and i really wanted it to be good as I hate tampons and pads and have to use both. I wonder if it's worth trying a different type?...

FindoGask Mon 19-Sep-16 20:35:31

"chuff chalice" - haha! this thread is brilliant.

JellyBelli Mon 19-Sep-16 20:35:59

He's a hypocrite.
Unless the sun actually shines out of the cracks in his arse.

VoldysGoneMouldy Mon 19-Sep-16 20:37:43

You inspected his arsehole and his feet. He's being a tit.

You're not asking him to insert it for you.

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