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AIBU to think that this is not funny

(36 Posts)
Meluzyna Sun 18-Sep-16 08:22:54

It was on the news about that Italian woman who killed herself due to the notoriety she gained from her sex tape spreading online. Sure she made an error of judgment, but then it became so huge that it destroyed her life.
O/h turned to teenage son and said "I bet we could watch it online".
shock shock shock
I think (hope) he was joking, but I made very clear to them both that it was precisely this attitude on the part of certain men which had driven the poor lass to kill herself, and that I really wasn't amused. WWYHD?

RIP Tiziana.

AyeAmarok Sun 18-Sep-16 08:26:57

I'd have been really disgusted with my DP if he'd said that.

I can't imagine that wanting to watch it being someone's reaction to that story.

Does he have an issue with porn? He seems a bit desensitised to real life.

Buzzardbird Sun 18-Sep-16 08:30:20

I wouldn't imagine he intended to be funny. I would imagine he just doesn't care about the poor woman and thinks that women are there for his entertainment.

BastardGoDarkly Sun 18-Sep-16 08:33:10

That's grim. I'd be horrified if my DH said that.

Hassled Sun 18-Sep-16 08:34:33

That's fucking appalling. Has he no empathy?

Cheerybigbottom Sun 18-Sep-16 08:35:07

That's awful. Worse that he encouraged a teenager to watch an illegal video that drive a woman to suicide. No respect at all.

ProfessorPreciseaBug Sun 18-Sep-16 08:38:21


and take son to offer him a chance of growing up as someone with a bit of humanity.

PS, I would normally suggest making a relationship work, but that was OOO.

MuffyTheUmpireSlayer Sun 18-Sep-16 08:38:53

That's a horrible attitude and worrying that he thinks it ok to pass it onto your DS. What was your DS' reaction?

Teenagers pick up on these things so easily and it's quite likely that your DS will grow up also thinking that women are there for entertainment (or otherwise "too sensitive" and lack a sense of humour) if that's what his father has taught him.

category12 Sun 18-Sep-16 08:45:43


imwithspud Sun 18-Sep-16 08:51:54

I too would be disgusted. You were right to correct him.

I think I read the same or similar story on Facebook and the comments that followed it were full of victim blaming tripe. It's very sad.

Mummyoflittledragon Sun 18-Sep-16 08:59:01

shock. I would have skinned him alive teaching this attitude to your Ds.

Waltermittythesequel Sun 18-Sep-16 09:00:35

What a fucking scumbag.

CalleighDoodle Sun 18-Sep-16 09:07:04

Yep i agree with the others. Scumbag. Even taking out the tragedy of the suicide involved, turning to your teen son and suggesting watching ANY porn video together is grim.

Adnerb95 Sun 18-Sep-16 09:09:55

I'd be mortified if my DH did this. And what a dreadful example to set to DS!

Might be an isolated error of judgement (in which case, he should be forgiven in due course, if you can possibly find the grace!) OR may be, worryingly, indicative of a really shit attitude towards women in general.

In which case, this is serious.

SpookyPotato Sun 18-Sep-16 09:11:49

That's the complete opposite of funny, it's vile. If my DP said that I would feel like I didn't know him.

ShowOfHands Sun 18-Sep-16 09:15:25

I'd seriously question who the fuck I was married to. It's an abhorrent reaction and to give that message to a teenage ds? I'd be disgusted.

SatsukiKusakabe Sun 18-Sep-16 09:21:42

How old is your son?

That's an horrific response, I'd seriously be questioning what kind of a person he was. Aside from the fact it's grim to want to look up any viral 'sex tape', in this particular case, knowing the fate of the woman... Well it's depraved, if I'm honest. And passing that attitude on to a child?

DoreenLethal Sun 18-Sep-16 09:26:09

How teenage? 13 or 19?

Is this a safeguarding issue? A father introducing his son to porn online is vile enough, to do it knowing the woman killed herself because of it is absolutely unacceptable.

Seeyouontheotherside Sun 18-Sep-16 09:38:45

That's a disgusting mentality and to share it with his teenage son is even worse. Poor womansad

Meluzyna Sun 18-Sep-16 11:24:11

Our son is 19, so legally an adult.
Having been married to his father for 30 years I'm inclined to think it was a pathetic joke, but I'm relieved to see that no one else thinks it was funny either.

Buzzardbird Sun 18-Sep-16 11:27:14

Aren't jokes intended to make someone laugh though?

acasualobserver Sun 18-Sep-16 11:29:58

Agree - tasteless 'joke' but, as you've concluded yourself, probably not indicative of anything more sinister.

Lariflete Sun 18-Sep-16 11:32:25

That's horrifying OP. To want to watch a sex tape that drove the woman to suicide is appalling but to want to watch it with your son??? I don't know if I could stay married to someone like that.

Batteriesallgone Sun 18-Sep-16 11:33:26

Well regardless of the (total lack of) humour involved, it was an opportunity to cast you in the unfunny killjoy role. Does he do that often?

Maybe you could point out to him he may as well have said 'Fuck you, I find your discomfort and humiliation amusing'.

Buzzardbird Sun 18-Sep-16 11:33:27

Did your son laugh then? Has he grown up with the same appalling attitude to women?

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