Advanced search

is this sexual harrasment or am i overracting

(24 Posts)
user1473980425 Fri 16-Sep-16 00:15:17

so i am currently unemployed and i am doing course with seetec, i started on Monday and for the past two days two guys on the course have been asking some very sexual questions and making me feel very uncomfortable.

they have been asking some disgusting things such as when did lose my virginity, how many people i had slept with, where the weirdest place i had done it was and he asked me if i "spit or swallow" i said i am not going to answers that he then said you must swallow then.

is the sexual harassment ?
or normal behaviour ?

i wanted to complain but someone told me i need to grow a thicker skin

what should i do?

AIBU to think this is not ok?

missingmumxox Fri 16-Sep-16 00:18:11

Yes it is and report to tutors

Pumpkintopf Fri 16-Sep-16 00:19:09

Op this is definitely entirely inappropriate behaviour. Please speak to the course tutor about it. You shouldn't be made to feel uncomfortable in a learning environment.

steff13 Fri 16-Sep-16 00:19:34

Ugh, of course that's not normal. Are they taking the course, to? Is there an instructor? I'd report it to whatever the governing body of the course is.

EnthusiasmDisturbed Fri 16-Sep-16 00:19:56

It's sexual harassment

Would you ask those questions ? I certianly wouldn't

Report them no need to put up with this

steff13 Fri 16-Sep-16 00:21:42


agentmarmalade Fri 16-Sep-16 00:23:42

Seriously, you have to ask if this is normal?

FoundNeverland Fri 16-Sep-16 00:24:27

Absolutely not OK! Report.

Buzzardbird Fri 16-Sep-16 00:27:33

Creepy guys probably think they're hilarious . Report the fuckers and teach them some common decency. Be prepared for the comments afterwards when you've hurt their sensitivities.

Lorelei76 Fri 16-Sep-16 00:46:26

Who is the someone who told you to grow a thicker skin?

Tell the people running the course.

Nocabbageinmyeye Fri 16-Sep-16 00:50:39

Who the hell asks anyone those sort of questions shock Totally not normal and definitely report

e1y1 Fri 16-Sep-16 00:55:06

No way is this ok. If this happened in the workplace and a complaint was made, the people in question would be dismissed.

In fact at my company, people have been dismissed for "lesser" sexual offences.

Omgkitties Fri 16-Sep-16 00:59:36

Are they 13 year old boys? hmm Such immature questions to be asking someone you don't know.

Report it!!

user1471734618 Fri 16-Sep-16 01:17:02

no you do not need to 'grow a thicker skin' !
Put in a serious complaint about it. It is outrageous that women still have to put up with this shyte in the workplace/training setting/ wherever.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Fri 16-Sep-16 01:21:19

Whoever told you to grow a thicker skin. Is a fucking stinking arse hole. You DON'T have to put up with * ANYTHING * that makes you feel uncomfortable.

Beeziekn33ze Fri 16-Sep-16 01:21:56

OP - you surely know that this is sexual harassment. Report these immature offensive young men so that neither you nor anyone else has to put up with them.

Beeziekn33ze Fri 16-Sep-16 01:25:21

I've just realised that you're not, as I assumed, 16 on at a 6th form college. Now I'm wondering how old these two are, no point in them staying on the course as behaving like that they are unemployable anyway!

Italiangreyhound Fri 16-Sep-16 01:27:18

Report it, and you do not need to grow a thicker skin, they need to shut up!

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Fri 16-Sep-16 01:32:34

Who was it who said. You need to grow a thicker skin.

Bogeyface Fri 16-Sep-16 01:47:21

ARe they quite young by any chance? There was a time when I was younger that lads in their late teens and early twenties thought this was fucking hilarious. We were young and naive and just thought we had to put up with it. Needless to say I have taught my daughters differently.

Report and keep reporting.

Sierra259 Fri 16-Sep-16 01:56:15

Nope, you are definitely not overreacting. Report them asap, and from now on keep a record of dates, times and details of any similar comments.

justilou Fri 16-Sep-16 10:04:47

I have some questions for you...
1) Does it make you feel uncomfortable?
2) Do you feel that if you complain about it, you will be dismissed as either a) A trouble-maker or
b) Bereft of a sense of humour
3) Are these conversations you would be comfortable having in a professional setting and with people of all ages, or are they of a sexual nature?
4) Do you feel harassed?

If you answer yes to any or all of these questions, then this is sexual harassment and needs to be addressed immediately. I would also consider using my phone to record these conversations to show whomever is in charge, so that they know you're not making this up.

TimeIhadaNameChange Fri 16-Sep-16 10:22:17

Definitely complain, and if the person who told you to grow a thicker skin is involved with the training I'd complain about them at the same time.

Yourarejokingme Fri 16-Sep-16 10:23:22

Are they young lads thinking this is funny, but there is another angle. We'll do this to get off this course as they are lazy shits.

Report it and report it now. No one should put up with this behaviour from anyone.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now