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AIBU?

To want to work an extra day?

17 replies

SleepForTheWeak · 14/09/2016 20:53

DH seems to think so.

I currently work 3 days a week, MIL looks after DD while I'm at work so we are really lucky with childcare.

My work (retail) are struggling with staff on a Saturday. Everyone works alternate weekends (except me) and one week they are short.

I suggested to DH I work alternate weekends on the one they are short staffed. It would be 12 hours extra a month but an extra £100 in my pay packet.

He says why would anybody want to work a Saturday? And basically just told me to not be so silly. I suspect the real reason is that it would interfere with his weekend golf as he would have to look after DD every other Saturday...

We are not struggling for money but I would really appreciate that £100 and maybe just put that straight in to savings every month.

AIBU for wanting to work an extra day when I don't really need to?

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DeadGood · 14/09/2016 20:55

I wouldn't be asking him, to be honest, I'd be telling him.

I'm not saying that decisions shouldn't be taken jointly, but I agree with you that he's thinking of himself here (and I thought that even before I read the bit about the golf). He doesn't want to have to look after his child without support.

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RandomMess · 14/09/2016 20:56

YANBU, you want to work, you want a life outside of being a Mum, he should be supporting you.

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Lilaclily · 14/09/2016 20:56

I'd be careful because once you commit to a weekend it's very hard to go back on it
How old are the dcs ?
Are they at school?
If so won't you miss seeing them?
I have to work weekends and hate it so I'm biased

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Lilaclily · 14/09/2016 20:57

I'd only do it if you really need the money tbh
If the problem is you being at home with the dcs while dh plays golf then you need to sort that instead

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Inyournightdress · 14/09/2016 20:58

I think your husband is being selfish and if you want to work of course it's not unreasonable.

But I'd think about it hard. Retail on a Saturday is really draining in my experience and when your dd starts school you might regret not having those weekends. Obviously that's a while off but work might be reluctant to let you stop doing Saturday's once you've started.

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Xmasbaby11 · 14/09/2016 21:00

I think your DH should accept if you want to work an extra day. However, make sure you definitely want to do it before you volunteer - it might be difficult to drop it once you've done a few.

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SleepForTheWeak · 14/09/2016 21:06

Thanks everyone - you are right - Saturday's would be hard to stop once I started. I need to think about it fully.

DD is only 2, I have 4 full days off with her and love it, but I figured every other Saturday would be fine to be away with her and I also think it would be good for DD and DH.

My worry would be MIL would end up doing the childcare Hmm.

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PhoebeGeebee · 14/09/2016 21:11

I think it's really important for parents to have equal alone time with their children, so for that reason I'd say go for it. How is DH usually when it comes to parenting??

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SleepForTheWeak · 14/09/2016 21:14

He's good, gets up with her most mornings if she's early and we do alternate bedtimes so can't complain.

He doesn't look after her a lot on his own though, I think partly he's still nervous about looking after her on his own for a whole day....but that can be sorted with practice! Also, I would be home at lunchtime.

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northernmonkey1010 · 14/09/2016 21:22

From a male perspective I think you are not been unreasonable you want to earn extra money 1200 a year is quite a nice sum. My wife's just gone back to work after maternity and works weekends I love having days just me and DD 11 months we are building a great relationship and I manage to keep her occupied for the hours the wife's out earning extra money to aid our house move

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JustMarriedBecca · 14/09/2016 21:25

I personally don't think £100 a month is enough to give up family Saturday's. Particularly if your husband works Mon-Fri you'd be left with just one day together. And soon that will be full of birthday parties etc so you'll want one day where you can spend time together

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toffeeboffin · 14/09/2016 21:38

I don't think it's worth it. Retail on a Saturday? Hell.

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CharleyDavidson · 14/09/2016 21:42

While your DC are young and you have time with them in the week, it seems like you see plenty of them. When they are in school 5 days a week and you are working one of the days they aren't in school, it begins to feel like you are seeing far less of them.

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3luckystars · 14/09/2016 21:44

Don't do it. It's not worth any money. Keep your weekends free.

start doing something every second Saturday for yourself (not working!) get your dh to mind your daughter and go off for a few hours, if you want.

Don't do it!

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SharonfromEON · 14/09/2016 21:45

I personally wouldn't . I think you could maybe do something else with your spare time if you don't need the money..

It is much harder, weddings, long weekends away when you are controlled by working EOW..

If you think DD and DH could do with spending time together can you do something for yourself sometimes on a Sunday..Saturday afternoon/morning?

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Ineededtonamechange · 15/09/2016 07:49

I reckon you are right and MIL would end up doing all the childcare so he could go to Golf - therefore negating the DH DD time, and making the whole thing less worth it.

I wouldn't....

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SleepForTheWeak · 15/09/2016 10:31

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate your opinions and honesty.

I already help out the odd weekend when I can do maybe I'll just leave it at that.

Don't get me wrong, DH will look after DD no questions asked if I'm meeting friends/getting a massage etc....but only if he isn't golfing Hmm

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