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The constant guilt trip

(12 Posts)
RachelLL92 Sat 10-Sep-16 16:33:23

So I had made it a regular thing to visit family with my lo I'm now expecting no 2 in 3 weeks feeling tired and don't feel I can do the 3 mile walk anymore and have been constantly made to feel guilty about it and also other descisions made like doing Christmas at in laws alternate years parenting decisions and such so I just need a bit of reassurance that I'm not out of order !?

TheLaundryLady Sat 10-Sep-16 16:34:59

YANBU - why can they not come to you ?

Sparklesilverglitter Sat 10-Sep-16 16:37:58

Not out of order

Alternative Christmases is just a grown up way of doing things surely
Parenting decisions, well they should fuck off
And as for not walking 3 miles, how about they make an effort to come to you

winkywinkola Sat 10-Sep-16 16:39:24

And even if you fancied Christmas on your own with your dcs or in another country or wherever, it's up to you.

It's so controlling trying to make people feel guilty about this kind of thing.

ny20005 Sat 10-Sep-16 17:01:32

We had one Christmas with Inlaws & my parents & then said that we would be spending each Christmas in our own home (before children) & continued this. Mil comments on it every year (10 years on ....)

Do what's right for you & your family & everyone else can get over themselves

RachelLL92 Sat 10-Sep-16 17:19:16

I totally agree with the controlling thing I'm the only one who lives my own life with kids and husband and I think that's a little hard to accept as to my parenting decisions il be sticking by them I just feel that they're own wants come before the kids and it pisses me off thanks for replies it makes me feel a bit better knowing I'm not in the wrong

PinkyOfPie Sat 10-Sep-16 17:21:02

You're 37 weeks pregnant and they're upset you don't want to walk 3 miles! Of course YANBU. Tell them to come to you

RachelLL92 Sat 10-Sep-16 17:28:11

Visiting in other people's home makes them uncomfortable that's why I always done the visiting by feeling it has went unappreciated and don't think il be returning to my usual routine after the birth

mrsfuzzy Sat 10-Sep-16 17:29:13

pull on your woman pants and tell them kindly but firmly this is how it is with your domestic arrangements from now on and stick to it, there might be tears and sulking but don't back down from what you want to do with your family, walking 3 miles and heavily pregnant with a lo ? jog on inlaws.

mrsfuzzy Sat 10-Sep-16 17:31:44

meant to say, if visiting makes them uncomfortable they either have to be 'trained' to get out of their comfort -lazy- zone or dh needs to take lo to visit, why should the onus be on you to make the effort ?

Mybeardeddragonjustdied2016 Sat 10-Sep-16 17:33:37

Your new routine needs to be in your own home with your kids. The lazy buggers can make visiting their gc their new one. And Santa will be coming to their own bedrooms this year!

RachelLL92 Sat 10-Sep-16 17:37:35

Ah sorry ladies it's my family that are the issue here not the in laws sorry if I've not made sense there that's why I'm making the effort with them not dh he doesn't know the half of the guilt tripping lol most of the time they say things and I can say my piece on it then I'm fine but sometimes it just gets to me

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