To be annoyed with a friend..

[MoonStar07]

It's a small minor thing...first world. I have a friend we've known each other a few years. I know I'm being AIBU. But our DCs will be in the same year group. Anyway when the school did the whole welcome to the school intro I said 'why don't we go together?' She said no she's going with another friend. No biggie. Anyway so we didn't end up sitting near each other (no biggie once again I sat with other people I know well) if anything I wanted to support her cos her husband has just walked out on her which is totally shit! But he was a complete bastard. Anyway I didn't want her to think she's alone. Now and up to the start of school I've been getting loads of messages regarding the school (we've already been there a year and her DC is new to the school) about uniforms mainly. Which is fine I answer the questions. Anyway AIBU to be a bit offended that I wasn't good enough to go to the info evening with and I wasn't good enough to sit next too! However I'm good enough to answer questions! The questions always start 'quick quick answer this....' I know first world problem

[CaptainCrunch]

I kinda see your point, sounds like she's using you a wee bit. If it's bothering you, take a step back and don't be too available.

[MothersGrim]

Yabu. She'd already agreed to sitwith someone else when you asked so. Should she have said no to other person and waited for you to ask?

PS, is this some reverse and actually you're the ones starting a new school because this is very petty!

[QuiteLikely5]

You said it was no biggie. Maybe you should take a step back and give her some space.

Don't be a doormat either, know your line and don't let anyone cross it

[Zippydoodah]

I've had this. I don't rush to answer te texts now. And I don't think op is being childish. It's the other way around. I love the name, btw. Very apt

[RosePseudonym]

What? Why care?

[TheDowagerCuntess]

It's ok to be annoyed by stuff, but to be moved to start a thread about something like this is ... well ... I'm not sure I'd get anything else done, if I did that every time something pissed me off.

It's life. Shit happens, from time to time. Be annoyed, then have a coffee and move on.

[Tissunnyupnorth]

Honestly? Grow up.

[Arseicle]

Of course she's being childish, the friends husband has just walked out on her and her children, and the OP wants to row with her because she sat with a different friend one time at a school event?
What the fuck? Don't feed her this shit about "not letting anyone use her", tell her to stop being a dick to her friend who is having a tough enough time.

Bloody hell.

[puglife15]

I don't think you're being a dick but maybe a bit thoughtless as she had other stuff to worry about.

But I think it would annoy me to get texts saying "quick quick answer this" from ANYONE.

[imwithspud]

This is incredibly petty. I don't understand how you can describe her not sitting with you as 'no biggie' then go on to ask if YBU to be annoyed that she didn't sit with you sounds like the sort of thing school children would fall out over, not the parents.

Her husband has just left her and all you're concerned about is picking petty fights over things that don't matter in the grand scheme of things. Yes YABU and childish.

[imwithspud]

That said, if someone text me frequently beginning their texts with "quick quick answer this" then I'd be inclined to leave it for as long as possible before replying so I guess that makes me just as petty.

[Zippydoodah]

Well, forgive me, but they could have all gone together . Id have said. I am going with Jane come and knock on the way or meet us at the gates or meet us there I'll save a seat for you. But then I am friendly. Everyone is different

[Arseicle]

Seriously?

Thats not friendly, thats controlling. Friendly is "hey your husband just walked out on you, how about I not make a fuss about something that wouldn't even register with someone who wasn't a dick"

[Witchend]

Isn't answering questions from new starter parents part and parcel of being there a year?

I had a younger dc in a year that seemed to be mostly first borns and I was asked questions by people I'd never had a conversation with before-and in some cases never again. Never bothered me. When dd1 first went I asked sone pretty obvious questions. With the other dc I answered some obvious questions

[Bastardshittits]

I would be fucked off about that. I'd just forget to answer her texts for a while and leave her to it!!

[Amelie10]

You sound so childish. Leave that sort of issues for the kids!

[Zippydoodah]

Controlling for including someone in the reverse situation???!!! Ya right

[SaucyJack]

You're her "Text when I need help" person, not her "Go out in public with" person.

Most people would be pretty pissed at being treated like AskJeeves if they were honest with themselves.

[MatildaTheCat]

You asked to the evening and she replied that she had already made another arrangement? Now you are pissed off because she's asked you some questions?

YABVVVU.

HTH.

[puglife15]

Mathilda you think it's ok to text someone starting "quick quick answer this"?

[MoonStar07]

Thanks lol! There have been a few other incidences of using me when it's convenient this was one example. but perhaps I'm the one not to be seen in public with. I did suggest we all go together but got no response.

[MoonStar07]

Also I do answer quick and give sound advice. I also give additional advice on things that I know has been very helpful. I'm not childish. I'm a king generous person with a great heart. I've stood by this person through a lot of shit. A better friend than the one she wanted to show up with. Perhaps I've been the doormat

[TheDowagerCuntess]

Come on, she probably just wanted to go - and get to know better - someone from her kid's actual year. That's what I would assume. She would've assumed (rightly) you had friends to sit with yourself.

If there are bigger issues at stake, then deal with those, and reconsider the friendship based on that. This incident alone is none to fall out about.

[Zippydoodah]