... They haven't even done anything differently. The difference is me.
Have name changed, because i could get my arse handed to me.
My in laws are good people. They have their quirks (daily mail regurgitators) which infuriates us, dh is quite a different person to his family, and I am similar to him.
But they are kind to me and our Dc's and we have always got along well. They are a bit high maintenance with some blow-you-away opinions (daily mail again), but no rifts or major family dramas. They do a lot to make me feel like family and I do the same for them. We get along. That's the background.
What has changed is my dm died 6 months ago. My dad died when I was tiny. You would think this would make me appreciate my parents in law more, but it's the opposite. They bother me more. It doesn't make sense. It's not even real things I'm irritated by, it's petty, I'll give examples...
- MIL has expressed incredulity that a friend of hers lost her mum a few months ago but you wouldn't know it, because she acts completely normal. It should have been an innocent comment to me, but I've felt judged by it. Her own adult dd is very emotionally demonstrative and they do a lot of psychoanalysis and reassurance and picking feelings apart together, but it's not me at all. I wouldnt show my naked body to the world, I can't show my naked emotions either. I can talk about them but not as entertainment over tea
- FIL believes his spoken words enrapture women with their wisdom. He often starts a conversation by saying a sentence consisting of a single noun, such as "circular saw!!" He will then stop, look at me pointedly saying nothing more and the way it's supposed to go is I look intrigued and pleasantly confused and then coax the rest from him, listening and agreeing to his monologue. He doesn't do this to males. I can't do it! I have always managed to diplomatically avoid this role play but I'm worried now my irritation is obvious.
There's more but I'm already feeling guilty writing down the above.
I hope this isn't permanent, Its not the kind of person I want to be. But I'm even thinking unpleasant judgments about mil's cooking. mines so much better
Crap, I'm a bad dil aren't I?