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AIBU?

pregnancy congrats

28 replies

Ilovetea82 · 01/09/2016 11:00

So dh told some of his friends (male and female) that we are expecting three of them came back saying how wonderful it was for him and our DS, AIBU to be a bit miffed that none of them enquired as to how I was? I get the feeling I am not liked by this particular set (not invited to gathering when dh and DS are and also been blocked on Facebook for reasons that are beyond me!)

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nennyrainbow · 01/09/2016 11:04

I thought you were having triplets when I first read it...Grin

Most people just offer their congratulations. If they know you well, they might enquire how you feel. I wouldn't get upset about it. Congratulations!

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Soubriquet · 01/09/2016 11:05

His friends, his congrats. Just like my friends, my congrats

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Soubriquet · 01/09/2016 11:06

Obviously if we are both standing in front of them, then it's both of us congrats, but if he has told them on his own, he would have got the reply and then thought no more about it

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gettingbythistime · 01/09/2016 11:14

Why should they ask how you are Confused you are pg not ill

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Puzzledconfusedandbewildered · 01/09/2016 11:16

I don't understand congratulating people on pregnancies.

"well done for having unprotected sex"

Feels odd

I do congratulate on new babies though

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60sname · 01/09/2016 11:18

Because creating new life still feels quite special to most people?

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PurpleDaisies · 01/09/2016 11:18

What do you say when someone tells you they're pregnant puzzled? Nothing?

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Ilovetea82 · 01/09/2016 11:18

I would have thought it was common courtesy to ask how I was as they asked about our son and then about some other friends that they hadn't seen in a while.
Perhaps I am just expecting too much, my friends all asked after dh and DS so I had expected the same sort of response.
It would seem perhaps Iabu

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PurpleDaisies · 01/09/2016 11:19

I think you are being unreasonable op. As long as they've said congratulations to your dh I'd assume that means both of you.

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Crispsheets · 01/09/2016 11:21

I would just think "did you want to be?"

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raviolidreaming · 01/09/2016 11:26

Surely being blocked off Facebook is the bigger issue here?

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raviolidreaming · 01/09/2016 11:27

I don't understand congratulating people on pregnancies

I offer all the congratulations if I know someone has struggled to conceive. To them, it isn't just having unprotected sex.

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PurpleDaisies · 01/09/2016 11:29

Whether it's deserving of "congratulations" or not, it's just what you say though isn't it?!

It doesn't look like in going to have my own kids so I find pregnancy announcements really hard to deal with, but you just put on a big smile and say congratulations because it's polite. I can't imagine anyone doing anything else. Blush

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PaulAnkaTheDog · 01/09/2016 11:29

I don't see the issue really. It's a bit self centred to expect them to be sending personal congratulations to you as well as saying it to your husband. Surely the general sentiment was there?

Why have they blocked you in Facebook?

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thecatsarecrazy · 01/09/2016 11:29

When my dh told people we were expecting I thought they might say something to me but they didn't. My mil sent a message but nobody else did.

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PurpleDaisies · 01/09/2016 11:29

That was supposed to be a Confused not a Blush.

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Ilovetea82 · 01/09/2016 11:34

I didn't expect a message to me, just an enquiry to my dh as to how I was (as they seems able to enquire about others why not me as well)
No idea on the Facebook thing, dh did ask two of them several years ago but was met by sniggers and oh we don't really know how Facebook works.

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Puzzledconfusedandbewildered · 01/09/2016 11:35

purple I usually say "ah that's nice" or similar. Depending how well I know them I may throw in a "good luck" too

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WorraLiberty · 01/09/2016 11:40

They've actually blocked you on Facebook and you 'get the feeling' they don't like you? Grin

Congratulations on your pregnancy OP Thanks

I don't think it's realistic to expect these people to ask after you, as there's clearly some sort of history/other story somewhere.

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SolomanDaisy · 01/09/2016 12:17

Well they obviously really don't like you. I'm surprised your DH is still good friends with people who exclude you from invites and block you in Facebook.

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Mysterycat23 · 01/09/2016 12:29

Congratulations is a safe response and from the situation you've described, the best possible outcome.. How would you feel if they did ask about you but the questions were prying or judgemental questions? I'd rather just be told congrats and leave it there..

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Waffles80 · 01/09/2016 12:30

You're being really precious.

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TheNaze73 · 01/09/2016 12:39

Unbelievable

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BigTroubleInLittleChina · 01/09/2016 12:47

The trouble is nobody is as excited as the mum/dad and immediate family.

Beyond say congratulations I'm not really that interested when someone announces their pregnancy, I suspect most people are like that.

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Lules · 01/09/2016 12:55

I do know what you mean. It did make me feel a bit like a vessel. I have never felt more ill than when I was pregnant and I struggled emotionally too (with a very much wanted and awaited pregnancy). However I think that only applied to friends of mine. I wouldn't expect other people to say more than congratulations.

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