I'm a teacher spending a fantastic amount on childcare, but a number of friends save through the use of family etc (which I don't have locally). They occasionally struggle to find the odd day covered, though it means they have a higher disposable income than me. I don't have this stress, but I pay shitloads not to!
I feel a few friendships lately have been cooled because I've said no to childcare help, surely aibu....
I have a 8m old and I'm on mat leave right now, plus a 3 yr old and 5 yr old so my hands are pretty full.
Request: 7-6 childcare for a teacher friend on an inset day for a 4 and 5 yr old (quite unruly 4 yr old who's never been left with anyone but family), said no as I'm often breastfeeding/ busy and I don't even think I could offer safety. Had visions of her two pushing each other off a trampoline/ squashing in a door whilst I was changing a nappy....
Request 2: One week of after school childcare. 5 yr old boy, hyper and needing a lot of input. Did a few days at the end of last term to help, massively stressful with a baby and I feel like I've done my bit. Just said no, it's a bit much.
Request 3: THREE children 3-8 yrs old, whole day. Said no, it's too much.
Request 4: Inset day again, teacher friend, nursery only do full weeks so doesn't want to pay for only 2 days use this week before term starts proper. Said no, under 1 yr old, I feel looking after other babies need huge amounts of care I can't give with 3 of my own
Request 5/ 6/ 7: School friends for slots here and there. Just been busy and didn't want to rearrange so someone could not have the stress of lugging a child around (I would for job interview/ funeral, ie short notice/ important). I just say no politely now, stopped saying I'm busy as they ask again and again otherwise
I don't think IABU for refusing, but aibu for getting quite annoyed they ASK? I have 3 5 and under, including a baby. Who even thinks in these cases to ask? One of mine even has SEN and struggles quite a bit socially which is bloody obvious they are aware of. I do think it's because I'm a teacher and they think I'm capable/ love kids. Once you've honestly said no, just on the grounds of feeling it's too much, people are always a little off. I do it sometimes, but I'm never going to get it back plus it leaves me housebound as I can only get my own in the car. Some are old/ good friends and it's a little wedge I think I've not dug them out a childcare hole, but I'm sure if their child was injured here running loose whilst I feed a baby to sleep they wouldn't be too happy.
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AIBU?
To be quite annoyed about these childcare requests!
61 replies
SexDrugsAndSausagesrolls · 01/09/2016 08:49
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