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AIBU?

To hate the label 'full time mummy'

389 replies

ilovenautical · 28/08/2016 08:42

Have 0 tolerance for mums that put down working mums & label themselves full time mummy's - seriously?! Does that mean working mums are part time? So when we drop child off to day care/family/CM we are no longer parents? We no longer think about DC and if they were unwell we would just wait till non working hours to see them? Grrrr infuriates me!! Angry am I the only one?

OP posts:
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ElsaAintAsColdAsMe · 28/08/2016 08:49

They are applying that label to themselves, it's not a slur on working parents at all.

You could easily say you're a full time mum and work as a XXXX.

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Jenesaberpas · 28/08/2016 08:49

I can't get too wound up about it. It sounds better than "unemployed".

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Chocoholicmonster · 28/08/2016 08:51

You are definitely not the only one. I actually had this thought this morning. Every parent is a full time parent - just some of us go out & actually work a paid job too.

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SoupDragon · 28/08/2016 08:52

Oh FFS get over yourself.

Yes, they ALL do it just to put down WOHP. Just like WOHPs who label themselves "working parents" do it to imply SAHPs don't do any work and to put them down.

Sheesh.

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LolaStarr · 28/08/2016 08:52

Totally agree. 'Stay at home mum' - fair enough. 'Full time mummy' - no.

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GirlWithTheLionHeart · 28/08/2016 08:52

Do you hate it because you feel guilty for working and leaving your kids? Seems to be stirring up a lot of emotion over something very trivial

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ParanoidGynodroid · 28/08/2016 08:52

It sounds better than "unemployed"

SAHM and SAHF are not unemployed!

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SoupDragon · 28/08/2016 08:53

some of us go out & actually work a paid job too.

And some of us look after our own children rather than paying someone else to to the work.

Goady fuckers!

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Zippidydoodah · 28/08/2016 08:53

It just means that they don't go out to work! I know what you mean, though; in the first year or so of being a mum I absolutely hated the term, as I felt it implied that working mums weren't "full time" mums. I also felt bad/sad about leaving my pfb, which very much clouded my judgement.

However, I now know that it's just a term and as a pp said, it's better than "unemployed"!

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user7755 · 28/08/2016 08:53

Anyone who refers to themselves as mummy unless they are talking to a child under 5 gives me the rage

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ClockMakerSue · 28/08/2016 08:54

It isn't putting other parents down, it's just showing what they do for most of their time.

Choc-'some of us go out and actually work a paid job too' ... Slightly goady!

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crje · 28/08/2016 08:54

They can call themselves what
ever they like.
It's not about you!

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ElaineVintage · 28/08/2016 08:55
Biscuit
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DollyBarton · 28/08/2016 08:55

Choco, the 'actually' in your above post indicates you look down on mums who don't work or don't see what that do as work. Was that intended?

I don't have a problem with the turn of phrase. Yes I'm still a mummy when I may work but I'm not working as a mummy in those hours. I guess it depends on whether you are using the word mummy in the context of the work as a mummy or the title of being mummy.

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Zippidydoodah · 28/08/2016 08:56

Loads of cross posting, sorry!

I can see this is going to turn into one of "those" threads.......

Just one thing, though: sahp are unemployed. I'm one at the moment so I'm not belittling the role.

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SoupDragon · 28/08/2016 08:57

it's better than "unemployed"!

isn't it odd how when you dump your child in day care for someone else to look at its "work" but if you look after your own children you are "unemployed"...?

And yes, I being deliberately harsh with the "dumped in childcare" comment. It isn't what I actually believe.

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Eminybob · 28/08/2016 08:57

And some of us look after our own children rather than paying someone else to to the work.

Ffs if I didn't "pay someone else to do the work" I wouldn't be able to feed and clothe my family. I'm not just farming my child out for the fun of it.

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DownWithThisSortaThing · 28/08/2016 08:58

I suppose the right wording is SAHP.
I can't get too bothered about it though. I know a few people who have put 'full time mummy' as their job on Facebook and if it makes them happy then fine (I think it's a bit cringe personally)

I'm a full time mummy too, I just happen to go to work 3 days a week Grin

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SoupDragon · 28/08/2016 08:58

sahp are unemployed.

No they fucking aren't.

I wish people would stop undervaluing the work done by a SAHP. It's the sme as sodding daycare only you do it yourself.

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RockinHippy · 28/08/2016 08:58

That doesn't bother me per se, but I do tend to judge anyone referring themselves as "mummy" unless speaking to a preschooler as irritatingly twee, probably a bit thick & definitely someone I don't want to spend time with

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SoupDragon · 28/08/2016 08:59

FFS if I didn't "pay someone else to do the work" I wouldn't be able to feed and clothe my family. I'm not just farming my child out for the fun of it.

Way to miss the point. Well done.

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mrsfuzzy · 28/08/2016 09:01

is op referirng to the pukiness of the expression 'full time mummy' itself though ? whether they are sahm, pt/ft/working or ceo of a global business, they are raising the next generation and that it the worlds most important job [plus mn needs the future generation to ask aibu about...mil/dp/the dog Grin. !

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Zippidydoodah · 28/08/2016 09:01

Bloody hell, Soup! I am unemployed! I do not get paid to do a job. My dp doesn't pay me to look after our children. I'm not saying it's not fucking hard work, though!

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Oysterbabe · 28/08/2016 09:01

What would you prefer them to say? Ok it's a bit of a cutesy term but it's just a description of what they do, not a criticism of what you do. Why so defensive?

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CathFromCooberPedy · 28/08/2016 09:01

They're not in paid employment Soup

And l don't like full time mummy either, do people who say this then call themselves part time mummy when dc go to school Confused

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