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To be annoyed by this....

(17 Posts)
Warl Sat 27-Aug-16 17:43:30

DH's cousin has a little girl just over a year younger than DD, i mentioned a few months ago that I was going to sort through DD's toys before her birthday & she said anything i was getting rid of she would be grateful of. I sorted out 2 bin liners full of toys & said anything that was no good pass on to someone else or send to charity shop. A few weeks later I asked if X liked the new toys & she said she hadn't had chance to sort through them all yet. Que this afternoon when we go round to X's birthday tea party, gets on to present opening & she sits there unwrapping all DD's old toys as presents off her parents. You could of knocked me down with a feather! No mention of it, even as we were leaving, I never said anything as I was taken aback but now I can't stop thinking about it. DH says he doesn't see the problem as I'd given them to them but I think it's bizarre, AIBU to be annoyed?

HunterHearstHelmsley Sat 27-Aug-16 17:45:59

I think it's OK. My DSis has been known to wrap up their own toys again as they never notice!

MonsterZinc Sat 27-Aug-16 17:49:37

Maybe they were strapped for cash? We're going to get a certain present anyway buy it was in your bag do no need to buy a double?
My kids often get charity shop bargains for presents!

CaptainCrunch Sat 27-Aug-16 17:50:54

It's better than wasting money on buying new stuff. Take it as a compliment they thought your second hand things were good enough to pass as new.

They should have thanked you though, whatever they were doing with the stuff.

A "friend" of mine took a whole load of Brio off me for her ds when mine grew out of it and then sold it all on eBay so it could have been far worse op.

mypropertea Sat 27-Aug-16 17:51:21

I'd probably feel happy that without me she may not have had presents! No need to tell anyone or mention it, just feel pleased.

RJnomore1 Sat 27-Aug-16 17:52:19

There's nothing wrong with second hand but passing off toys you have been gifted as your gift to your child is shocking. And not even mentioning it in passing to the gifted is even more so!

HemanOrSheRa Sat 27-Aug-16 17:52:52

I wouldn't have a problem with it but it is strange and a bit off that they didn't thank you for the toys you gave them.

Arfarfanarf Sat 27-Aug-16 17:53:32

maybe they don't have much money.

Focus on the fact that the child had a lovely birthday and is happy with lots of new toys.

2kids2dogsnosense Sat 27-Aug-16 17:53:50

I would be pee'd if she hadn't told me. Other than that, I'd have no problem with it.

gamerchick Sat 27-Aug-16 17:53:56

I'd take it as a compliment. I've bought stuff from charity shops to give as presents this isn't really any different IMO.

BuffyFan Sat 27-Aug-16 17:56:07

There's nothing wrong with preloved, but it would have been a simple courtesy to ask or say that's what they planned. As it stands, that must have been really awkward for you.

FiaMarrow Sat 27-Aug-16 18:04:39

passing off toys you have been gifted as your gift to your child is shocking

Shocking? That's a bit of an overreaction. Plenty of people rely on goodwill for children's gifts and I doubt the child knows or cares where it came from.

OP, you donated the toys. What happens to them afterwards is not your concern. Perhaps the cousin feels awkward because they can't afford to buy new toys and would rather not talk about it.

Just be happy that your good deed is making someone else's day.

expatinscotland Sat 27-Aug-16 18:18:46

Maybe they don't have any money. You gave them to her. It's a gift. Now you're putting value judgements on that.

RJnomore1 Sat 27-Aug-16 18:27:16

It's not about having the money or not it's about simple manners and yes I am sorry but it is shocking. The child was getting the toys anyway, the actual giver of the toys should have been acknowledged to the child or their agreement sought.

expatinscotland Sat 27-Aug-16 19:07:28

If this is something you find 'shocking' you have lived quite a sheltered life.

Warl Sat 27-Aug-16 20:30:59

DH has the same stance as a lot of you have posted in that the toys were going to X anyway which I understand and tbh if his cousin had said she was saving them for their birthday I probably would of been ok with it, that would of been preferable to sitting round in a circle watching these presents get opened with no clue. It was so weird & awkward, not to mention DD who kept looking at me puzzled

ageingrunner Sat 27-Aug-16 20:34:50

They might have been a bit embarrassed about being short of money maybe. I can't see the problem at all really confused

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