My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

PFB... Come on.

63 replies

PirateFairy45 · 25/08/2016 15:37

What's wrong with PFB?

My DD is my PFB and I don't care if you judge me on it, why are people so stuck up about it?

I've seen so many times "oh it must be PFB, that explains a lot" in a condescending way.

But what's wrong with your child being PFB?

Not trying to antagonise, Just wanna know

OP posts:
Report
coconutpie · 25/08/2016 15:41

People who say PFB piss me off. No it's not PFB.

Report
coconutpie · 25/08/2016 15:43

Sorry posted too soon by accident, no it's not PFB - it's just how you feel as a parent. I hate that condescending crap, you are perfectly entitled to be as "PFB" as you want to be. Just because somebody thinks it's ok to let a baby be passed around to a load of people at a week old, doesn't mean it's PFB to be totally appalled by that idea.

Report
FeckinCrutches · 25/08/2016 15:44

Because some people do ridiculous over the top things like buying devices to warm up baby wipes etc. People often look back and laugh at silly things they did that they wouldn't dream of doing with subsequent children.

Report
Eatthecake · 25/08/2016 15:46

I don't get the pfb thing either, it's called being a parent surely Confused

I don't like my 4th baby being passed around to strangers anymore than I liked it happening to my first born.

Report
NavyandWhite · 25/08/2016 15:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tryingtobestronger · 25/08/2016 15:47

What does pfb stand for

Report
Iwasjustabouttosaythat · 25/08/2016 15:47

Couldn't agree more. It's like there's something wrong with adoring and looking after your own child.

Honestly, if you're not a bit PFB, you're probably biologically broken.

Report
FeckinCrutches · 25/08/2016 15:48
Report
Eatthecake · 25/08/2016 15:48

Unless the new first time Mum is doing harm to you why not just leave her too it? Even if she wants to warm baby wipes it doesn't effect your life does it

We've all been over anxious, too careful with our babies. Is that pfb or is that just learning what it's all about

Report
Dontyoulovecalpol · 25/08/2016 15:50

Mothers of precious first borns??! Shock

My husband is extremely over protective of his FB (oddly enough they are twins so not really) me, less
So. In fact he just had to stop them climbing onto the roof of a cretain rooftop bar because I was having a beer and MN'ing Wine

Report
DontBuyANewMumCashmere · 25/08/2016 15:51

I always it's an amusing nod to how everybody was with a first child, that they later get they can't be with subsequents.

I was totally obsessed to the point of developing anxiety about my DD's sleep. I imagine with a second I will just chuck her anywhere and if she doesn't sleep, she doesn't sleep.
I won't talk about putting the dummy in my own mouth before my PFB's, in case it was "too dry" for her hahaha

Report
Pinkheart5915 · 25/08/2016 15:51

I don't like the whole pfb thing either

People adore own child Shock they might be an over cautious Mum but they are learning.

Report
Sparklesilverglitter · 25/08/2016 15:55

I've not long had my first baby and yes maybe I worry about things I shouldn't, maybe I've brought things that some would say oh you don't need that but I've never been a mum before I'm learning.
Yes I adore my own child so if that makes me pfb so be it

Report
NotMe321 · 25/08/2016 16:01

I recognise with all the benefits of hindsight that PFB is definitely a Thing. I was certainly much more precious and uptight about DC1 than I ever was about his siblings. It has nothing to do with loving your child - I certainly love DCs 2 and 3 just as much - it's about the way you deal with him/her.

Report
dangermouseisace · 25/08/2016 16:02

what feckin crutches says

I think it's a light hearted thing rather than condescending

Report
Thurlow · 25/08/2016 16:02

There's nothing wrong with it at all, of course your first born is precious.

However it is often used for things that people tend to do a lot more for their first born than their second. Like keeping meticulous notes of how much milk they've drunk that day, or anti-baccing the slide before they go down it.

Report
BestZebbie · 25/08/2016 16:03

I always assumed that it comes from guilt that a first child is treated much better than the subsequent ones (number of baby photos, baby groups etc) because of sheer logistics. The best way to deal with the guilt is to say "well I didn't want to do that anyway, how silly to do that"..

Report
LucilleBluth · 25/08/2016 16:06

It's just a joke. I'm waaaaaaay more chilled with DC3 than I was with no1.

Report
DamaskRose · 25/08/2016 16:11

Only the bitter and twisted can't cope with how a mother / parents are over their firstborn, when they're being authentic. I think, though, the brand of pfb that can get to people is the 'look at me being adoring and caring for my baby', or acting as if no one else has ever done this amazing thing.

Report
HuskyLover1 · 25/08/2016 16:13

But some people become such a bore when they have a baby. I tried to retain some of myself, talk about things other than the children, have weekends away with my then H. My best friend changed beyond recognition when she had her DD. Totally obsessed. Every single conversation had to include her daughter. She literally can't talk about ANYTHING else, and it's still the same to this day, even though the DD is now 17. ALL of her facebook photo's have to include DD. Every post is about DD. I am pretty sure that if I said I was flying to the Moon, that she would say that her DD was doing that too. BORE OFF! I don't see her any more. It's just too much. Goodness knows what she will do when DD goes off to Uni soon. I'm guessing she will just become a shell of a person.

Report
corythatwas · 25/08/2016 16:15

To me, pfb is when a mother - or indeed father- gets so taken up that s/he expects everything- including the needs of other children- to give way before her/his child because s/he cannot imagine that anybody else on the planet can be equally important. Unless you live totally isolated, ott pfb-ness does have a tendency to impact on other people.

Nothing wrong with adoring your baby. Everything wrong with expecting other people to see that he is more important than other babies/elderly relatives/etc.

Report
DixieWishbone · 25/08/2016 16:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

ChocChocPorridge · 25/08/2016 16:23

God, I still hanker after a wipes warmer for me (not the kids).....

Report
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 25/08/2016 16:25

I have a friend that designed a spreadsheet for her first born and made notes on sleep times/duration, feeding times, contents of nappy.

She now has two more children who survived their first weeks without data recording and we laugh about it now. Grin

Report
BackforGood · 25/08/2016 16:27

What FeckinCrutches said.
It's not insulting, it's not nasty, and of course we all had ideas / did things with our first child that we realised were completely OTT later in life, which is why it raises a smile from more experienced parents when they hear first time parents doing things that are often quite daft.
On here, it's just shorthand, which is useful when you are typing on a quick moving forum.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.