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Neighbour just came over because baby cried

(38 Posts)
NoCapes Tue 23-Aug-16 15:11:31

The baby was tired and due a bottle, I changed his nappy before I gave it to him
So he cried, for a grand total of about a minute

It wasn't a particularly loud cry, wasn't prolonged, wasn't a distressing cry
Absolutely not the loudest or longest he'd ever cried
It was just a pissed off, hot, tired wail

So after I'd give him the bottle and he was asleep a neighbour I've never spoken to before, not a next door neighbour one from across the road came over and asked 'if everything was OK because i was out in the front garden, heard a baby cry and then suddenly stop?'
I said 'yes babies cry'
She said 'yes?'
I said 'yes then he stopped when I put the bottle in his mouth'
She said 'oh ok just checking nothing bad had happened'
And tootled off

Did she think I'd slung him out of the window or something?
I'm just so very confused, why would you do that?!

usual Tue 23-Aug-16 15:14:26

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SquidgeyMidgey Tue 23-Aug-16 15:14:40

Hopefully she was offering to help in case you'd had a catastrophe. Go put your feet up for 5 minutes, grumpy babies on hot days are tiring flowers

SquidgeyMidgey Tue 23-Aug-16 15:16:07

Sorry, that sounded horribly patronising blush the year my DS was born we had about a week of 35 degrees and I was sunk by the end of it.

Gottagetmoving Tue 23-Aug-16 15:27:38

Well, when bad things happen, people get criticised for not checking if they hear a baby cry and then suddenly stop.
Without hearing what she heard, I can't tell if she was genuinely worried or just totally overreacting.
Was it so sudden it could alarm her?

usual Tue 23-Aug-16 15:30:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

springwaters Tue 23-Aug-16 15:31:30

Maybe she was trying to be helpful? If you had something was wrong then she might have offered to help.

Ladymayormaynot Tue 23-Aug-16 15:33:04

She bothered to come, that's a good thing isn't it? Try & see it as good intention , there's a million & one other ways to be nosey.

happyvalley4 Tue 23-Aug-16 15:36:13

The problem is with this warm weather the windows are open and sound carries so it probably sounded louder to her.

But she's obviously a worrier because if I heard a baby crying for a short time I would think nothing of it.

My daughter was born in a heatwave and was a mardy baby. She hated being bathed, being dressed, having her nappy changed etc etc and screamed the whole time. A week or so after she was born I bumped into my neighbour who lived 4 doors down and she said she knew I'd had my baby because she'd heard the crying from her house! confused

Try not to let it get you down OP and enjoy the rest of the day. smile

Missgraeme Tue 23-Aug-16 15:43:49

Maybe it was her odd way of coming to meet a neighbour/make a friend?

Arfarfanarf Tue 23-Aug-16 15:44:34

She did it because she was concerned.
Better that than it actually was something and she had the 'none of my business' attitude that contributes to children staying under the radar.
Horrible for you of course, as a living mum going about perfectly normal business.
But it's best that people check when concerned than dont. Better that you check and its nothing than you dont and it was

HedgehogHedgehog Tue 23-Aug-16 15:45:07

Some people just dont know about babies. I remember before i had a baby i used to hear the neighbours baby crying sometimes and it seemed like it was going on for ages and i was thinking 'why cant you shut your baby up what are you doing?!?' ....... now i totally get it. Babies cry. Sometimes even when youve tried everything. Sometimes for quite a long time. Thats life! I wouldnt worry about this because anyone she speaks to who has had a baby will also tell her 'babies just cry mate, thats what they do'

Mummyoflittledragon Tue 23-Aug-16 15:55:51

It sounds as though she was concerned and possibly doesn't have the best social skills. Perhaps changing this to being her issue will help you appreciate she was most likely trying to help. It is actually nice to know there are caring neighbours in case of a crisis.

amidawish Tue 23-Aug-16 15:57:06

it doesn't sound like she was complaining
maybe that was her way of saying hello, hope you're all ok?
it can be startling if a baby is really freaking out and then suddenly stops, if you're not used to it that is!
i wouldn't think any more of it.

MrsDeVere Tue 23-Aug-16 16:00:42

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fluffycloudland77 Tue 23-Aug-16 16:01:05

I'm fairly confident that if you had harmed the baby you wouldn't give a full doorstop confession "yes, I put a pillow over his face".

Birdsgottafly Tue 23-Aug-16 16:01:20

She may recently read a 'tradegy' that's happened, were neighbours ignored a crying baby, so thought she'd check.

Or she honestly thought that you'd be glad of 'another pair of hands'.

NoCapes Tue 23-Aug-16 16:01:29

You're right I'm sure she was just concerned
It's just odd because he cries all night every night quite a lot and she's never been over before, but comes over this time when he didn't cry for very long

...maybe that's it actually! Maybe the quick settling is such a rarity that she thought I'd finally snapped and done something awful
Hmm now I'm thinking I should've shown her the sleeping baby to prove my innocence

NoCapes Tue 23-Aug-16 16:04:29

Aww MrsDV you don't sound like a nosy old bag
I'm only 27 and take any excuse I can to have a nosy and a sniff of people's babies grin

RosieSW Tue 23-Aug-16 16:07:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

deste Tue 23-Aug-16 16:07:42

I would look at it as a lovely gesture. If it was me I think I would thank her next time you see her. You never know she could end up being a lovely friend.

pigsDOfly Tue 23-Aug-16 16:08:21

I seem to be on my own here (apart from OP) but I think that's a really odd thing to do.

What did she imagine had happened that cause the baby to stop crying suddenly, gagged and shoved into the attic? And what did she imagine she could do to help?

My neighbour has a young child that's a bit of a moaner. Am I supposed to pop across every time he stop moaning just to make sure he's stopped moaning for a good reason?

RosieSW Tue 23-Aug-16 16:11:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SandyPantz Tue 23-Aug-16 16:14:52

I heard a terrible bang from my neighbours.. went round to check if he wasn't half dead trapped under a heavy dresser or something… no matter how much I tried to explain I was just checking he was okay he seemed convinced I was either complaining or nosy.. didn't go well..
… I'ld do the same again though, having actually found an elderly neighbour on the floor unable to get up once.

sleeponeday Tue 23-Aug-16 16:14:59

She can't be used to babies. I'd just assume bottle, boob or dummy had done their blessed, blessed duty, but someone unaware that they can function like an off switch and babies just stop crying in a way adults don't might be unnerved?

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