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To find her infuriating.

(5 Posts)
lastqueenofscotland Sun 21-Aug-16 16:56:03

I have a group of friends who I've known since my teens, there are 7 of us. On of the seven, let's call her Jane, has always been a bit self-centred, which is ok, but recently it's got silly.

We keep in touch mainly via a whatsapp group, but either on there or in person she is constantly turning the conversation round to her. Even if it's totally inappropriate ie someone asking for advise and she'll randomly perk up with "I just did this at work." She can't bear others getting praise - I ran the London marathon this year and everyone else congratulated me via the whatsapp group, she didn't but posted pictures of her riding a horse for the first time, another girl is doing really well at slimming world, she never takes any notice of her updating us how she's doing, will just let us know about something she's done that day. confused

She also loves being the victim
Incident one was she had a friend walking her dog for her while she was at work, her friend got in touch saying that the dogs harness was in a bad state (it was) and she wasn't happy walking the dog until it had been replaced because she was worried he'd get loose, she went on about how unreasonable this was and apparently if the friend had an issue with the "perfectly serviceable" harness she should buy a new one confused.
She frequently calls out sexism on things that aren't, she works in a team of two, her and a man, and sometimes the mans close friend from a different department comes in and chats to him about weekend plans, and only exchanges pleasantries with this, apparently this is sexist. I suspect it's maybe because this is that the two men are good friends.
Her dad remarried a younger woman, and they have two young children, she is annoyed and feels like she is a second priority as her bedroom in their house (which she lives about 400 miles away from is the box room and doubles as the spare... she's 27 and goes there about twice a year... Apparently this means his pinger children (pre-teens) are his priority... I think it means she's left home.

She can also just be a bit of a malicious twat.
Someone we know posted something about taking her severely disabled son to a fast food restaurant and she kept making catty comments about how she'd not take a child "let alone a sick one" (her words) to a fast food restaurant. I did call her out on that cause it was a bit nasty how she went about it.
she's done the above (malicious I'll thought through judgey comments) a few times recently and it's driving me up the wall.

Aibu to think she's a twat?!

Rant over. That's better

allthecarbs Sun 21-Aug-16 16:59:59

Yanbu. She sounds awful. She's sounds very insecure and envious of you and your friends achievements.

As she's part of a bigger group I don't think you've got much choice but to hold her at arms length.

TheWitTank Sun 21-Aug-16 17:02:16

Just ignore all of the photos/comments she makes that intrude on another persons conversation. Do exactly the same to her as she does to others. I have a similar friend and have started treating her the way she treats me. Suddenly she has become a whole lot nicer!

mrsfuzzy Sun 21-Aug-16 17:13:42

she obviously feels jealous/left out of things and needs to big herself up but all she's doing is winding everyone up, when she acts like this it is best played down and calling her out on the outlandish silly stuff ,disabled when was that ever sick ? i suppose she would rather such people were kept out of sight or something equally stupid. she does sound hard work imo. i think i would distance myself from her a bit.

lastqueenofscotland Sun 21-Aug-16 17:14:22

Carbs- yes that's my issue I can't cut her off as she is part of a group (though I know at least one other thinks she's a twit too). I just do my best to ignore the attention seeking as much as poss and call her out on the shit

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