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School refusing to call child by preferred name

(2 Posts)
kiki22 Fri 19-Aug-16 21:08:36

I'm posting on behalf of my cousin and her daughter.

Her dd has just started school for the first time her name on all school forms is the same as her birth cert for example Katie Boyle Brown, Boyle is the mum's sir name brown is the dad's. Since these forms have been filled in her contact with her dad has ceased and dd does not like to be called her dad's name, I can 100% say this is the child's choice she wants to be the same as her mum because her dad is not nice to her this is her own words. My cousin is not trying to change her name legally at this point but is just using Katie Boyle she doesn't want to fight to change the name on the say so of a confused 4 year old.

The first 2 days of school Katie came out upset and she was called her full name on register and at her desk it's on a print out, cousin said no problem I'll ask your teacher to just say Katie Boyle don't get upset, everything official would stay full name. The head has come back and said that she has to be known as the full name in the school and they will not drop the Brown even for informal purposes. AIBU (we) in thinking that the child's wishes should be followed? I can see why the wouldn't drop it but can't the teacher just leave it off when calling her name? This child has been let down so badly by her dad she really doesn't need a daily reminder of him I feel very annoyed that she is so upset when it could be avoided easily.

trinity0097 Fri 19-Aug-16 21:26:23

They won't be using surnames once they get to know them better if this is a P1 class I imagine, unless there are two girls with the same name.

Not using legal names though does cause problems later on when full legal names have to be used for things like exam entries.

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