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to not understand the parents jetting off on summer hols, but leaving their kids behind??

(270 Posts)
ICoriander Fri 19-Aug-16 15:24:15

I just really, really don't get it.

Just seen on fb some friends doing the obligatory airport pic before jetting off abroad, whilst their 2 kids (around 8 and 11) are sent off to grandparents for the week. The kids usually spend their whole summer holidays with family so the couple can work, but they always take a week away themselves during that time. I could maybe understand it if they were doing a family holiday abroad, then one on their own, but the kids don't ever go.

Obviously none of my business, but it makes me irrationally angry, as it seems so selfish. I have dc of similar ages, and would never take the opportunity to go on holiday with dh without them; we'd be lost!

Is it just me??

Kalispera Fri 19-Aug-16 15:26:04

Holidays without kids are 100% better than holidays with kids!

We've never done a week but have had a weekend away a couple of times and it's great. Gives us time have <gasp> actual conversations and <double gasp> actual sex. grin

AliceInUnderpants Fri 19-Aug-16 15:26:47

Why don't you ask them to explain it to you?

Mirandawest Fri 19-Aug-16 15:27:29

I'd feel wrong going away in the summer holidays without my children (although they're with their dad at the moment so DH and I could have gone somewhere I suppose).

isthistoonosy Fri 19-Aug-16 15:28:07

If the kids are enjoying themselves with family I don't see the harm. We've had a night away without ours, I'd kill for a whole week. grin

nickEcave Fri 19-Aug-16 15:28:21

If I could afford to do this I absolutely would! However I would only do it if I could afford and had enough holiday time to have a family holiday with the kids as well.

RiverTam Fri 19-Aug-16 15:28:21

So the kids don't ever go abroad, or they don't ever go on holiday (ie away, either UK or abroad) with their parents?

FallenStar3 Fri 19-Aug-16 15:28:24

I don't think it's you're business, they might be having a holiday for themselves a wedding anniversary, a big birthday or going to someone's wedding abroad but making a holiday of it.

Mirandawest Fri 19-Aug-16 15:28:26

I do go away with DH and without the children - we'll be going on our honeymoon in October (having got married in July)

Rumpelstiltskin143 Fri 19-Aug-16 15:28:46

Stop being so precious. Surely you were a couple before you had children, rather sad that you no longer have anything together without the children.

chitofftheshovel Fri 19-Aug-16 15:28:58

They'd be so much better off going out with the school holidays

totally misses the point of the thread

Witchend Fri 19-Aug-16 15:29:28

Maybe the children asked to stay with grandparents.

TheGruffaloMother Fri 19-Aug-16 15:29:49

Because parents are obviously not allowed nice things independent of their children hmm

Seriously, having a nice week away without the kids is fine. The other 51 weeks are all about keeping the kids happy.

nickEcave Fri 19-Aug-16 15:30:20

Maybe the grandparents live in by the sea or in a "holiday" type place and take the kids out to loads of places so they are effectively getting a holiday with their grandparents? I agree that if the kids are just being left with the grandparents and not being taken out lots/given treats then it does seem pretty mean for the parents to get a foreign holiday.

PaulAnkaTheDog Fri 19-Aug-16 15:30:59

Whoa, mega over reaction. Perhaps the kids like spending time with Granny? Perhaps Mum and Dad are getting their first alone time in several years? There are loads of reasons why and guess what? None of them are any of your business. You just sound judgmental and sanctimonious.

YABU, perhaps they feel that they need some time together as a couple to reconnect. Personally I think it's important for a strong and healthy relationship to have time together.

I do agree however that it's a bit mean to never take thier DC's on holiday.

Vickyyyy Fri 19-Aug-16 15:32:28

I am doing this in March blush

We had a family holiday this year and it was beyond stressful. Kids seemed to enjoy themselves BUT they would have enjoyed themselves at home. They wouldn't go in the pool or on the beach or anything.

When we got back we booked a holiday for just us. Kids will be at grandads which they love. We did it this March also for our honeymoon...I felt dreadful about it to start with and did not enjoy the first few days, then we got sent a bunch of photos of what they were doing and such and it brightened me up and I enjoyed the rest of the holiday a lot..just being able to actually relax. Kids were happy to see us, grandad had enjoyed seeing them so much, and we were nice and refreshed...great all round tbh

intrusivethoughts Fri 19-Aug-16 15:33:16

I couldn't go away without first having a family holiday, maybe there's a reason for it though, the children may not cope well on flights or in hot weather.
They may prefer not to go and actually have lots of fun with grandparents.

LaurieLemons Fri 19-Aug-16 15:34:26

Why? Maybe the kids aren't bothered? If the kids wanted to come then I'd see your point. I hated going on holiday as a child and I'm still not that keen on them.

ICoriander Fri 19-Aug-16 15:35:16

If I could afford to do this I absolutely would! However I would only do it if I could afford and had enough holiday time to have a family holiday with the kids as well.
Yeah, I don't think I would think so much about it if they ever took their kids abroad with them, but they don't.

chitofftheshovel grin

WhooooAmI24601 Fri 19-Aug-16 15:36:27

DH and I go away without the DCs every now and then. They stay with MIL in the Gower and have the best time ever climbing into rock pools and getting spoiled, and we get to switch off for a few days and relax. We also take lots of holidays and trips with them, too.

It's possible to be a great parent and love your DCs dearly and still need (and enjoy) time away from them. Balance is what it's about.

mrsmugoo Fri 19-Aug-16 15:37:25

I think it's good for your marriage to remember you're still a couple rather than just mum & dad.

Kids have a great time with grandparents imo so everyone's a winner.

RiverTam Fri 19-Aug-16 15:37:37

But do they take their kids on holiday? My point is that abroad doesn't necessarily make a 'better' holiday for kids than the UK. If they didn't take their kids on holiday at all that would be pretty poor.

FestiveFran Fri 19-Aug-16 15:38:16

Holidays without children are healthy and utterly lovely. Wouldn't do a week as ours are little but the odd weekend is wonderful for us, them and Granny.

A friend of mine can't enjoy herself is she's not with her children and I wonder how she'll cope when they're old enough to prefer time with their friends over Mummy.

Babyroobs Fri 19-Aug-16 15:39:23

I have a few fb friends who seem to have at least 2 weeks away on a girly holiday every year/ getting pissed etc . I would feel guilty doing that myself and leaving the rest of the family at home. A weekend away for a special occasion or hen weekend is different but it just seems to be a regular thing for some..

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