Aibu to be pissed off with BF(9 Posts)
I'm due to go into hospital for a lumbar puncture due to a medical condition I have...
Was originally on 2nd August but was pushed back due to "insufficient doctors" and is now on this coming Thursday...
BF has said "yeah don't worry, I'll come with you. I'll sort it." To find out today, he's down in London for work. I have also told him almost daily for the last 2-3 weeks since it was rearranged! He has known that I HAVE to have the LP done due to a massive change in my condition and has been adamant that he will take me.
He owns his own business and has staff that can cover the work load at the office but he'll be in London to do the manual/physical side of the job in question and his staff aren't qualified to do that.
Have asked if he can go the day before or day after and he said he'll "try" but didn't seem too enthusiastic about attempting to rearrange when he knows how important it is for me to have the procedure done and how terrified I am.
Have phoned my mum since having said conversation and she's unable to get the time off work to take me, same for my dad, and those of my friends who drive are either working or have children and is inconvenient for them to take me/collect me. I'm not able to drive due to anaesthetic and the sensations in my legs may cause spasms, and the pressure in my head will be low so also causing issues. Taxi is not an option as the hospital is 30 mile away resulting in a rather expensive trip that I can not afford.
So, Aibu to be slightly pissed off??
I'll try usually means he will wait and see if you can get someone else.
chances I have told him this via text and he said "I'll have to see what I can do".
YANBU. He was not thinking about what he promised, has now double booked and is reluctant to rearrange his work. He needs to prioritise you over his work in this instance, if this is impossible then he should help you make alternative arrangements. Could his parents help?
Let him know that you are upset he forgot about your important appointment and say it means a lot to you for him to come. Give him a deadline to confirm to you if he can make it or not.
My dp did this when I had a general anaesthetic in Feb. I asked him to book the day off, he didn't, he got rostered to be in Spain and had to get a 7pm flight, it's about four hours to get to the airport and I was in the afternoon session.
I've not forgiven him. I had to be collected by the brother in law of a friend I'd never met, and had my stepson to look after too. I arranged to stay with a friend (both me and ss). Dp missed the flight and ended up back home after all that too. Oh, and had to do the work remotely overnight so kept me awake!
No, you're not bu to be pissed off. He's being inconsiderate!
unless they are all part of essential services then they all sound like right tits, why on earth wouldn't your mum and dad drop everything to help you?
I had a cry when it was rearranged from the 2nd, because everything was set in stone and I'd mentally prepared for everything.. So had to go through the entire process again of sorting everything for it.
It wouldn't be so bad if it was done in the hospital closer to me but because it's to do with neurology, they have to do it at the other one!
Even asked my DD's dad but because he's off work to have her whilst I'm in there, and children aren't allowed on the ward I'm a bit miffed!
Hospital have also asked for me to be "supervised" for at least 12-24hours after leaving hospital due to the side effects and any issues that may happen. But I'd be really struggling to do basic things like climbing stairs, sitting up unaided, going to the toilet etc.
He said he won't know about rearranging London until Monday. So I'm going to go nuts if he cannot. It can wait. Or I'm sure he could do it earlier this week or the Monday of next.
I'm gonna have to guilt trip and be like "without this procedure, I can go blind or even worse, have a pressure build up and rupture an artery in the brain, then I'd be totally dependant on you. You don't want that now do you"
Let's see how he likes that
burning my mum works with older patients with severe mental health disorders - I.e; multiple personality disorder, schizophrenia etc. She cannot get time off authorised the same week as its "too short notice" and has to go through various people to be authorised.
Also my dad is a self employed builder, he's recently been off for a couple of months dealing with his brothers death and sorting all the legal side of things and is now severely out of pocket due to having to take time off for bereavement. Also, my parents are separated and mum lives 20 mile from me, dad is 45 mile away. So not exactly convenient for neither to be ferrying me around. Mum said if she had known at least a week in advance then she would but her work are dicks.
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