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to think that if you're going to send me an invitation you should double check my name?!

(38 Posts)
OlafLovesAnna Sat 13-Aug-16 17:54:09

We've received an invitation from a bloke my DH has been friends with for 10+ years. They're not close but studied for professional exams together and a small group of them are still friends and get together occasionally. I have known him through DH for the same amount of time.

I never noticed him get my name wrong when we meet but as its not often it may just not have registered (I'm a tiny bit precious about my name as its not common but is a variant of a more popular name).

Anyway the invitation has arrived with the wrong name aibu to think that if you were unsure of spelling etc you at the very least check Facebook or with mates or verbally with dh?

Not offended by the invitation or suddenly hating perfectly nice people so this is a tiny bit lighthearted wink

Willyorwonte Sat 13-Aug-16 18:23:54

This is a real non event.
Unless, you are Sally and he invited Claire, it's nothing to be concerned about.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Sat 13-Aug-16 18:25:49


In true MN speak "is that all you have to worry about" princess.

A non-event.

acasualobserver Sat 13-Aug-16 18:26:29

Well, are you actually offended or not?

StillDrSethHazlittMD Sat 13-Aug-16 18:27:38

Know what you mean, though, lighthearted though it may be. My ex was born Judith but always called herself Judi. Always spelled it Judi not Judy. Her handwriting was extremely legible, as is mine, so they would always see us sign "DrSeth & Judi" in every Christmas card, birthday card, christening card, new job card, good luck card, post card - whatever. Yet at least two of our very closest friends would always send stuff to "DrSeth & Judy"

FuzzyOwl Sat 13-Aug-16 18:30:50

I think people only check the names they don't know and assume people they have known for over a decade would have said something sooner.

listsandbudgets Sat 13-Aug-16 18:34:54

DPHIL once got invited to an event. The invite was addressed to Mr x and Mrs y listsandbudgets.

Now that would have been OK EXCEPT

1 we are not married.

2. Y is not my name.

Turned out that the person doing invites had just assumed they were married as they had the same surname.. they'd never even met let alone married!

Costacoffeeplease Sat 13-Aug-16 18:36:37

I'm a tiny bit precious


CMOTDibbler Sat 13-Aug-16 18:43:01

I've been married to dh for 19 years as of this week. I have never, ever referred to myself as Mrs or used dhssurname and everything inc my FB is CMOTDibbler. Ds (10) is myname-hisname. None of the ILs, or my brother address envelopes to us using my correct name, or our 'if you can't be arsed to use our names' preferred alternative of the 'myname-hisname family'. I refuse to open anything addressed to the mythical Mrs Hisname

OlafLovesAnna Sat 13-Aug-16 18:47:30

By being a tiny bit presh I mean a always correct people if they use the wrong name. As in 'Hi Susan! It's Suzanne....' Or Caroline, how are you? It's Carolyn...' Or 'Hey Georgia! It's Georgina....'

I'm sure DH and I would have noticed if he'd been using the wrong name for decades. I'm more perplexed, or perhaps bemused at the oversight as its so easy to check if you're unsure but it is indeed as you all say somewhat of a first world issue to muse.

BoGrainger Sat 13-Aug-16 18:50:00

But he probably wasn't unsure, he thought he had the correct spelling so why would he check?

VladmirsPoutine Sat 13-Aug-16 19:03:25

I refuse to open anything addressed to the mythical Mrs Hisname

That must be a miserable way to approach life but each to their own.

Crunchymum Sat 13-Aug-16 19:09:49

Does it happen often?

I have a friend who is a Marie and 50% of the time people default to Maria or Mary... usually being corrected once resolves it though.

OlafLovesAnna Sat 13-Aug-16 19:09:50

I think Bo it's because it's not just a spelling it's an entirely different name, something similar to my examples. If it was Claire and Clare or Lucy and Lucie it still seems lazy but not quite as odd.

FuzzyOwl Sun 14-Aug-16 09:33:33

Is there a chance that the friend didn't write the invites himself and the miscommunication happened by the person who did write them either reading or hearing him say your name wrong?

Why don't you either go back to your friend and say you want to double check the invite is for you because it isn't your name on it or just accept and cross through the wrong name and write the correct one in?

NavyandWhite Sun 14-Aug-16 09:38:42

My names gets spelled wrong more often than not by my inlaws and I've known them over 20 years. Same goes for youngest Ds too.

I have signed many a card with the correct spellings so it isn't like they can't check.

Not really bothered tbh.

Cocochoco Sun 14-Aug-16 11:20:39

Loads of people spell my dp's name wrong including my mum and the best friend he's had since school!

Cocochoco Sun 14-Aug-16 11:23:46

Oh and my gran always spelled my dd's name wrong. My dd took to using the wrong spelling when she wrote back to her as she was worried her great-gran would realise and get upset.

TheNaze73 Sun 14-Aug-16 11:34:36

If this is all you have to worry about, then life must be good wine

I'm sure there's a logical explanation

Whatthefreakinwhatnow Sun 14-Aug-16 11:38:35

What an absolute non-issue!

confusionis Sun 14-Aug-16 11:40:43

I think it can be a quite huge deal. I've worked very hard to get a title next to my name. My surname has never been changed from birth. If my friend had invited Mr and Mrs (fuckwit husband's surname) to her daughters wedding, I actually wouldn't have gone. She would have receieved a polite text from me stating that I am sure my MIL would be happy to come.
Fortunately she invited Mr fuckwit husband and Dr confusionis. (the fact that she invited him is a different discussion)
First name mis-spellings wouldnt faze me though. Especially from random aquaintance as you have described he is.

sofato5miles Sun 14-Aug-16 11:46:06

Precious, egotistical people who are offended by this sort of thing need to get a firm grip on issues that are actually worth getting het up over.

TheSilverChair Sun 14-Aug-16 11:48:08

I'd put it down to a brain fart and move on with my life.

Whatthefreakinwhatnow Sun 14-Aug-16 11:54:19

Precious, egotistical people who are offended by this sort of thing need to get a firm grip on issues that are actually worth getting het up over


CurbsideProphet Sun 14-Aug-16 12:01:49

OP do you mean they got your name completely wrong: ie. Claire when your name is Sarah? Or slightly similar: ie. Sara/Sarah, Mary/Marie?

Either way, I would also be surprised if my DP's friend of 10 years couldn't get my name right!

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