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To have recorded this and now be considering social services?

(226 Posts)
MxJackMonroe Fri 12-Aug-16 21:37:35

I went to a beer garden today with the boy (6) and the dog (on a lead, well behaved) to kill an hour of time.
I spent that hour listening to a 'woman' (looked like a teenage girl) growling at her kids, 2 under 4, shrieking, calling them fucking little cunts, snatching toys off them for no reasons, barking at them, encouraging them to scare the dog 'to see if he was friendly', as she downed pints and shots, and left when a drinks tray flew at my face and she came over to retrieve it...not to apologise, as I assumed one of the kids had thrown it, but to laugh in my face as she said "well they wouldn't fucking share it so I fucking threw it away innit." No apology. Laughing at herself for nearly clouting a stranger in the face with a tray. I'm usually quite ballsy but Jesus, she seemed insane and quite volatile, so, feeling extremely sorry for her kids, I quietly left.
I've just had a text from my bank to say my bank card has been fraudulently used. I checked my bag. My wallet - which was on the table in the pub garden, is not there. The little scrunge not only terrified my dog and threw a drinks tray at my face and screamed at her kids all afternoon, it seems she nicked my wallet too.
I'm meant to move house tomorrow. I need to pay £2,200 that I have worked my arse off for, to a letting agents at 10am. Luckily for me I can go to my bank with ID and get it out. Unluckily for her, I left my phone on the table recording SB playing with the dog (making cute memories to listen to when I'm down) and caught all her shit in there too.
First move, calling the pub to see if they have CCTV in the garden.
Second stop, if she can be identified, social services?
I am a genuinely reasonable, decent person. But Jesus Christ, this thing hit all my nerves today. And her kids deserve her getting some help.

DeathStare Fri 12-Aug-16 21:39:47

You would need to be able to provide the full names and addresses of the kids before social services could do anything.

Amelie10 Fri 12-Aug-16 21:40:33


BrianButterfield Fri 12-Aug-16 21:41:40

The police would be my first move to be quite honest.

Arcadia Fri 12-Aug-16 21:41:39

How do you know it was her that took your wallet?

99percentchocolate Fri 12-Aug-16 21:42:04

I'd be showing the police the video and seeing if they can identify her. Those poor kids. Glad you can withdraw using your ID - good luck for tomorrow!

couldntlovethebearmore Fri 12-Aug-16 21:42:26

Sounds like a nice pub

DesolateWaist Fri 12-Aug-16 21:43:03

Have you reported the theft?
If your card has been used then they might be able to trace it back to her.
You could phone the NSPCC for advice?

FriendofBill Fri 12-Aug-16 21:43:26

Are you sure you didn't lose/drop your card? I wouldn't be so quick to blame if you didn't see.

ImperialBlether Fri 12-Aug-16 21:43:34

Are you the real JM?

Would there have been CCTV anywhere near the pub? Do you think it was a set up so that she could get near to your bag?

So lucky that the bank cancelled it - how did they know it was fraudulently used?

Amelie10 Fri 12-Aug-16 21:44:53

So she took your wallet and left your phone? Shouldn't you have called the police by now instead of dithering on mn?

MxJackMonroe Fri 12-Aug-16 21:45:25


I suspected that might be the case. My parents were foster carers for years, I've grown up in a house full of kids who were treated like shit. It's not something I considered lightly, but Christ, she threw a drinks tray at me for fucks sake. And god, we all get mad at our kids, but they were genuinely just playing nicely and she was raging at them in a quite terrifying way.

MargeryFenworthy Fri 12-Aug-16 21:45:59

YANBU - sounds like she should be locked up and the key thrown away.

FriendofBill Fri 12-Aug-16 21:46:30

Did she throw the tray at you or near you?

milkysmum Fri 12-Aug-16 21:46:57

Sounds harsh but socials services wouldn't do anything about this I'm afraid. You need to report your wallet stolen and unless you saw them steal it ( or you find CCTT of them stealing it) you have no way of knowing it was them )
Totally understand why this is pushing your buttons though

MxJackMonroe Fri 12-Aug-16 21:48:02

Amelie10 My phone was in my back pocket. Wallet was on the table as it, er, doesn't fit in my pocket. Card has been cancelled, pub called, no other cards in the wallet, police crime reference number incoming as I need it for the card procedure, not sure what else I should be doing here. I'm sure we all have other things to do than 'dithering on Mumsnet'.

DesolateWaist Fri 12-Aug-16 21:48:15

Your wallet was on the table.
You didn't realise it was missing until you had a call from the bank.
You don't know at what point the wallet was taken. It might well not have been her.

SquinkiesRule Fri 12-Aug-16 21:49:40

Maybe she thre the tray so she could come over while you were distracted, to pinch the phone.
I'd call the police too.

MxJackMonroe Fri 12-Aug-16 21:51:22

Whole wallet gone, not just card. It's massive, kind of hard to drop! I said it 'seems' she took it, and first stop was calling the pub to see about CCTV... Yes the bank said it had been attempted to be used, they text me the transactions and asked me to verify.

Eyelashcurler Fri 12-Aug-16 21:51:53

Police - they might be able to ID her if she's "known". Harder for ss to do this.

HateSummer Fri 12-Aug-16 21:52:46

Who goes to a pub to kill time a day before they move house?! Bloody hell.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Fri 12-Aug-16 21:53:12

Jeeze of course you are not being unreasonable.

In their haste to be dicks to you some posters have lost sight of the real and serious situation here.

Dontyoulovecalpol Fri 12-Aug-16 21:54:30

Social services aren't going to do anything.

Has any money been taken from your account? Hope you caught it in time

MxJackMonroe Fri 12-Aug-16 21:54:35


I've had a 6 year old and a dog to get home. We went from the pub on a 2 min walk to my Nan's, where my bag was with me the whole time, to a cafe, bag with me the whole time, Nan got dinner so I didn't even look for my wallet, then she dropped me home. There's no other point where it could have been taken, and we were the only occupied tables in the garden. I need evidence, of course, but my thought is throwing a tray to nick a wallet is a pretty good distraction.

NeedsAsockamnesty Fri 12-Aug-16 21:54:37

You would need to be able to provide the full names and addresses of the kids before social services could do anything

No she won't a good description and location can often be enough (obviously if she's not on holiday)

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