To be pissed off that he's going out to catch fucking Pokemon!!!!!

[BibbidiBobbidi]

Long story short.

DH has been on nights all week which means that I've been looking after DD (4 months) on my own. I'm not normally bothered by this but this week she hasn't been sleeping at all. We've been getting up at least 4 times a night every night and to be completely honest I'm exhausted.

DH doesn't do anything around the house. He claims that he does but in reality he does fuck all.

Yesterday I found out that his mum is coming over this morning to paint our utility room (?!) at 8am!!! So he's obviously not taking over from me this morning so that I can catch up on some sleep.
Then he announces that he's out all afternoon too. When I asked what he's up to he said that he's going out to catch Pokemon with his work mates.

I'm furious.
I'm exhausted.
I'm upset.
I'm pissed off that a fucking game is being put before my needs.

In my opinion he's being totally selfish and isn't thinking about my needs. He knows how tired I am. I look and feel as though I haven't slept in years.

This morning DD decided that she was done sleeping at 4am so we've been up since then. Same as yesterday.

AIBU to be totally hacked off that he's doing this or am I being selfish?

[mmgirish]

Have you said all this to him?

[BibbidiBobbidi]

Not yet.

I will be when he gets home, worried it'll all come out as a massive rant though.
I don't want to stop him from doing what he wants to do but I do wish he would think about me for once.

[abbinobb]

Tell him he can take dd with him

[JagerPlease]

Pokemon hunting is definitely a pram friendly activity - he should take her

[Fairylea]

He can push dd in the pram and go Pokemon hunting.

[HoneyDragon]

So he gets his mummy round to paint his house whilst you look after his baby and he goes out to play with his friends.

He's a literal man child.

[Nothavingfunrightnow]

Honeydragon has it spot on - not that that helps you, OP. But that is what you are dealing with.

[spacefrog35]

Pokemon hunting is, as others have said, the perfect excuse for taking baby for a nice long walk. I do it & so does DH, sometimes together sometimes separately.

He does sound like a bit of a baby himself though

[HoneyDragon]

I Pokemon hunt with the dc. He has an entirely portable one. He can take her.

You can have a much needed nap.

[MooPointCowsOpinion]

He does nothing around the house? Nope. That's not a husband or a father, that's a child lodger.

Where do women find these losers?

[Imnotaslimjim]

I agree with PP's - DD is entirely portable and the fresh air will help her sleep. Don't give him the option, pop her in the pram and tell him he's taking her. Does she bottle feed? If so set one up so he can take one with him, it will give you longer to snooze. And if he does take her, sleep! Don't be tempted to catch up on missed housework, that will still be there tomorrow.

[Imnotaslimjim]

I agree with PP's - DD is entirely portable and the fresh air will help her sleep. Don't give him the option, pop her in the pram and tell him he's taking her. Does she bottle feed? If so set one up so he can take one with him, it will give you longer to snooze. And if he does take her, sleep! Don't be tempted to catch up on missed housework, that will still be there tomorrow.

[DesignedForLife]

Agree with everyone else, he ca. Take her with him.

[LBOCS2]

Yep. DH takes all our DC Pokemon hunting with him - and they're 9, 3 and 4mo. Vigorous walking with the pram is great to get babies to sleep and then once your baby is napping he can set a lure and stay there while you sleep at home. I get 4ish hours to myself like this!

My sympathies about the lack of sleep - we're going through the 4mo regression too and it's a bit hellish.

[JohnLithgowsLargeForehead]

Yes agree that he can take her. He does sound very selfish, not noticing you're on your knees!

[pestov]

YAB a bit U, he probably doesn't realise what your needs are if you don't normally mind. He likely thinks he's in the good books having organised work on the house, asked to go out with his pals, and you haven't told him that you're struggling. People don't always realise how bad it can get with a baby if they don't see it for themselves. Communicate!

And babies love Pokemon

[Namechanger2015]

He sounds like a selfish arse. You need to have words, and if it comes out as a rant then so be it.

He cannot, cannot leave his wife and 4 month old to go out fucking Pokemon hunting.

It really shows how little he thinks of you, he should be giving you a break and spending time with his brand new baby daughter. Or painting the utility room himself - why the hell is he allowing his mum to do this for him?

So so selfish. I'm angry for you.

[wobblywonderwoman]

He sounds about five. Why is his mum painting the utility?

Yuk.

He is acting like a big baby

[PaintedDrivesAndPolishedGrass]

Tell him he doesn't need to leave the house at all to hunt Pokemon. My DCs have it sorted out, not sure how but I can ask them when they eventually wake up if you like.

[SistersOfPercy]

Tell him he doesn't need to leave the house at all to hunt Pokemon

Correct. If he's on Android it's slightly easier but iPhone requires a jailbreak. Basically you change the location on your phone and fool the game into thinking you're somewhere you're not. So for example, you can fake your location to the beach and catch water pokemon. It does require a little technical knowledge though.

As for OP. I agree, put baby in pram and walk. Tell him it will hatch his eggs

[TheNaze73]

Do you talk to him directly OP?? Men really don't do subtle hints. Spell it out to him & make sure, your alone time with friends is in balance with his. We all need to let off steam with our friends & you need a release too. Good luck

[accidentalpirate]

*I don't want to stop him from doing what he wants to do
*
But him stopping you from doing what you want to do is fine?

[pizzakat]

My DP is hooked on Pokemon go as well, but everytime he goes out he takes DD (8 months) out in the pram with him, maybe let him have today with his work mates then suggest taking baby on further trips?