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AIBU to ask how you found having a baby at 37/38? Was your age a thing?

(71 Posts)
BrazenRaven Thu 11-Aug-16 12:49:24

Just wondered how people feel about having a baby at this age.

Is it viewed as older for a baby these days?

I know it's a personal thing and everyone is different etc but would appreciate some honest opinions.

If you had a baby mid to late thirties, did you feel your were older?

where I live, people have very much had their children by 35 so having one at this age, I would be in a minority,

I've two other children if this is relevant.

Thanks in advance.

LokisUnderpants Thu 11-Aug-16 12:51:38

Shamelessly placemarking. Considering another one.

willowtreecottage Thu 11-Aug-16 12:51:52

I had a baby a 37 - my third.I was a bit more tired than when l had one at 27!
But no, these days l think it is quite young still.

HeCantBeSerious Thu 11-Aug-16 12:52:51

One of my best friends is considering a second at 38 (would be 39+ when born) and another is pregnant with her 4th (also 38-nearly-39).

I don't think anyone is particularly concerned about it.

Offler Thu 11-Aug-16 12:55:18

Had one at 31, second at 37. Felt much better with second, birth easier, baby easier (or at least seemed so) and no less tired for me!

HereIAm20 Thu 11-Aug-16 12:55:20

I had my first at 28 and second at 37. If anything I was more relaxed (although partly because it was my second and partly just because I was not so bothered about "stuff" and appearances etc by then with the experience of life).

My friend had a first at 41 and because she was more settled financially and had her career has been able to feel more relaxed about being a mum rather than worrying about things and careers.

Offler Thu 11-Aug-16 12:55:46

No more tired I mean 😁

wigglesrock Thu 11-Aug-16 12:55:59

I had my 3rd just when I was almost 38. I didn't find any difference - I was 31 and 33 for my other two. I remember making some kind of comment to my midwife at an appt about my age and she laughed and told me I was in the younger end of her group of pregnant women. My youngest is now 5, she's just finished her first year of primary school, - there's quite a few parents the same age and older (I'm 42 now). I honestly didn't feel any older, I didn't feel the pregnancy was particularly harder, I was more tired and very sick but I usually am, I also had two other kids to look after and a physical job so that was more to do with it. The birth and recovery was fine.

Noonesfool Thu 11-Aug-16 12:57:20

First at 38. Wasn't an issue.

abigwideworld Thu 11-Aug-16 13:00:08

I'm having my first at 23. Honestly it seems like there's very few mothers in their early twenties now, most seem to be in their thirties. I don't think anyone would judge you.

Vanillaradio Thu 11-Aug-16 13:00:37

I had ds at 37. My age was never mentioned by any medical professionals and was not a "thing" in any way. It is not unusual where I live for women to have first babies late 30s and beyond (I know a 47 year old!) and I didn't feel old at all.
Interestingly, am now trying for dc2 and will be 40 next month and every medical professional (I'm high risk because of a couple of medical conditions so needed preconception advice) has mentioned my age and told me to get on with it!

mrsnec Thu 11-Aug-16 13:01:15

We tried for years to get pg with dd. I got pregnant at 35 then lost it, then got pg with dd a few months later then got pg with ds 6 months later.

So I'm 38. I have a baby and a toddler and I'm knackered but I don't know if I'd feel the same way if I was younger.

They were both born by cs. Gynae did say my age was a factor in that though.

ErrolTheDragon Thu 11-Aug-16 13:02:13

Just the one, at 38. No problem. Some advantages if you're more mature, financially secure and well established in your job.

ConcreteUnderpants Thu 11-Aug-16 13:03:07

I've not long had my 3rd at 38. Aside from being a lot more tiring (but that could be down to depression, dealing with other kids, being single), all is good.
I actually asked a couple of midwives and my consultant about my age, as technically I was classed as a geriatric mother (!). They all poo poo'ed it, and said a lot of mothers are having babies later in life now, so I was more in the norm than not!

Don't know if it's my body clock or the reminder of how cute and munchable babies are, but my ovaries are already pulsing again for another one.. Being single, not that it will happen. sad
Go for it!

JacquelineChan Thu 11-Aug-16 13:03:46

i had my ds - first and only child - at 38. I was in great shape , i used to be a real gym bunny , ate healthy etc , i found the pregnancy and birth easy and straightforward, which i know makes me lucky. I didn't feel old , i lived in an area where there was only 1 younger mum at the ante natal class !

however - having a toddler at 41 as i have now is very tiring i think . I can't help but wonder how much more energy a 21 or 31 year old would have ......But maybe everyone feels the same with a very energetic 2 year old? We moved to an area now where i am closer to the grandmothers ages when dropping him off at nursery .... but it doesn't bother me !

I am actually very glad i had him at 38 , because for me that's when i was healthiest, financially stable and mature enough to be a mum , and with a man who is a fantastic dad rather than the losers i dated in my youth !

liz70 Thu 11-Aug-16 13:03:52

DD3 was born a fortnight shy of my 39th birthday. I had the easiest pregnancy and labour of all three with her. No problems at all. She is almost seven now, and in perfect health.

Jackiebrambles Thu 11-Aug-16 13:04:36

I had my first at 36 and my second at 38. I didn't feel 'old' to be having a baby at all, either time, although I am older than some of my mum pals, I was also younger than a few of them. Distinctly 'normal' I would say.

But then I live in London, the demographic here does tend to mean that older mums are more common.

I have noticed that i'm a lot more tired with my second, and getting up off the floor when playing is harder! But maybe that's just having two young kids under 4 and being basically knackered all the time!

janed9388 Thu 11-Aug-16 13:04:58

first at 41, second 2.5 years later - he's just turned 1. I'm tired, but no more than anyone else I expect, I'm probably fitter now than in my 30's (as I am more motivated to get rid of the pregnancy weight)

Bogeyface Thu 11-Aug-16 13:05:44

I had DC 6 at 38 and it was fine. I didnt feel that my age was an issue at all, and neither did the midwives etc. The only issue was the fact that it was my 6th which the consultant felt ruled me out for homebirth, which I had anyway and it was fine.

If it werent for money and space (or lack thereof!) I wouldnt rule out another now, at 43.

First child at 34, second at 38. Like Jackie, I am in London so a lot of parents seem to be a similar age to me.

Having a second was more tiring but I was also a more experienced parent so that balanced things out a bit.

eurochick Thu 11-Aug-16 13:10:29

I had my first at 38. No one was in the least bit concerned about my age. I did have placenta issues and the baby was iugr. She was struggling and so was delivered at 34 weeks. No one has ever found a cause but from my own research I have read that placenta problems can be more common in older mothers. However I also had unexplained infertility (having my first at 38 was not the plan!) so it could be that whatever was causing that was linked to the placenta issue. There are also more placenta issues in IVF pregnancies (which this was) so age might have had nothing to do with it at all.

coldcanary Thu 11-Aug-16 13:11:22

Had third at just 37. The pregnancy was a lot more tiring and I seemed to take a bit longer to recover (despite having easy birth and pregnancy) but all in all I was fine.
Be prepared for comments about 'mature mother' or if it's not your first pregnancy 'experienced mature mother'!

f1fan2015 Thu 11-Aug-16 13:11:28

Anyone else get mistaken for their DC's grandmother? It has only happened 3 times in 6 years thank goodness!

BikeRunSki Thu 11-Aug-16 13:12:08

I had my first at 37. I had no special treatment due to age or anything, and all went well. I was older than the average at the various baby groups I went to, but certainly not the eldest. I had my second at nearly 41. She's about to start school and I did feel a little ancient amongst the other mums at the taster days last term.

Missgraeme Thu 11-Aug-16 13:14:09

I had baby 11@43. Number 10@37. Lack of sleep was hard after a six year gap but really don't think it was age related just that I had been sleeping through for 6 years!!

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