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to move family abroad?

(73 Posts)
friendish Mon 08-Aug-16 19:09:36

DH has been offered an opportunity to work in Australia for two years. I would love to go but we have young DCS and it's so far from family. My mum is already piling on the guilt and saying it's too far/expensive to visit and how she won't Skype because it isn't the same as holding her grandchildren. Wwyd?

chickenowner Mon 08-Aug-16 19:18:53

Go with him. You and your children will have an amazing experience of living in another country, and two years isn't that long. It should be your decision and not your Mum's!

ThroughThickAndThin01 Mon 08-Aug-16 19:21:58

I'd go. Amazing opportunity.

bakingaddict Mon 08-Aug-16 19:22:34

Would your DH get a generous relocation package? I would never emigrate myself but would like to live in another country for a just a couple of years if the opportunity ever came up.

rugbychick1 Mon 08-Aug-16 19:23:10


Amy214 Mon 08-Aug-16 19:23:18

Go with him! I would love the opportunity to move to australia. Don't let anyone change your mind, it isn't even that long but you may love it so much that you want to stay!

OreosAreTasty Mon 08-Aug-16 19:24:01


PurpleDaisies Mon 08-Aug-16 19:25:01

Go go go! I have lots of friends that had done a year or two in New Zealand or Australia (doctors) and absolutely loved it.

You won't regret it.

Sparklesilverglitter Mon 08-Aug-16 19:25:08

I'd go. It would be a wonderful experience for you and your DC for the 2 years

timeforheroes Mon 08-Aug-16 19:26:28

100% go. Fantastic opportunity for you all. It will be hard I'm sure for your mum, but you can't live your life like that.

cingolimama Mon 08-Aug-16 19:27:37

Sorry, but your mum is being manipulative and horrible. Go and have a fantastic experience.

Seryph Mon 08-Aug-16 19:28:07


Bumpkin2 Mon 08-Aug-16 19:29:16

Don't go and let him take me instead?!

Rumpelstiltskin143 Mon 08-Aug-16 19:29:28


MagnifiMad Mon 08-Aug-16 19:29:53

It's 2 years - not so very long - go!

I have been abroad for 5 years now and I know it is really hard on my parents which makes it hard for me. I find it actually gets harder rather than easier and we are looking to move back to my home country now but a limited, 2 year experience abroad sounds fantastic!

friendish Mon 08-Aug-16 19:29:59

The finer details are still to be agreed but there is a relocation package and significant salary increase and the role should open doors on his return in the UK too. I just feel so guilty about taking my children away from their grandparent for two years.

I have to go though don't I? I would always wonder what if. I know it would be good for the kids too as we don't live in a very nice part of the UK either!

MooPointCowsOpinion Mon 08-Aug-16 19:31:10


AlpacaLypse Mon 08-Aug-16 19:31:58

My youngest sister is halfway through doing this but USA rather than Australia. Apart from my nephew and niece's accents going increasingly transatlantic, it's been brilliant.

It does help that both her h's mum and ours have been weepy but also very positive.

Hariasa Mon 08-Aug-16 19:35:17

We're about to move abroad for two years.

My PILs are very unhappy about it. We're doing it anyway.

They can afford to visit, if they choose not to that's up to them.

It's a brilliant opportunity for DH career wise and a good opportunity for the DC too.

It's only two years, it'll go by in a flash.

chickenowner Mon 08-Aug-16 19:36:53


Iloveowls2 Mon 08-Aug-16 19:37:59

Go. It's 2 years. Unless your mum is in ill health where I'd probably reconsider. But it's your life to live your mums role is to support you. Could she in fact fly out for a visit?

NPowerShitShower Mon 08-Aug-16 19:39:10

Go, but with conditions.

1) decent relocation package (removal services/mortgage covered for your UK property/housing paid for)
2) someone to find you accommodation/schools etc when you arrive
3) you also have the right to work
4) if you want to return, DH won't stop you. Australia has a huge number of women effectively trapped there due to their children being habitually resident there and so they can't leave. Many went 'temporarily' with their DH's jobs... Make sure you understand The Hague Convention and speak to a lawyer about paperwork.

I have lived all over the world and have found that companies will try and get away with the minimum they can give you. All that said, good luck and hope it works out!

AndYourBirdCanSing Mon 08-Aug-16 19:41:02

Go! I really hope I will never have this attitude when my own kids grow up. I think your mum should be supportive and lay off the guilt tripping!

justilou Mon 08-Aug-16 19:41:08

Just check your financials before you commit. The pay probably seems good, but rents/taxes/utilities/insurance are exorbitant, you have to pay every time you see a doctor and again for prescriptions. Food is a lot more expensive, etc... Public transport is expensive and unreliable.
Here are some websites to look at... to look at rent prices in the areas you wish to live in... - do a fake online shop - make sure you add nappies if your kids are still wearing them...
A lot of people from the UK are bedazzled by the seemingly large salaries but find the cost of living overwhelming...
Apart from that, it's a great place. My husband and I moved from Aus to the Netherlands - was supposed to be 2-3 years and it's been 8! Because we haven't had family or friends (initially) to lean on, we're incredibly close. It's had rough moments but it has definitely cemented our bonds. We are looking at returning one day soon and I'm pretty torn about it.

spanieleyes Mon 08-Aug-16 19:43:40

Go. We went to the Caribbean when my children were 4 and 2, it was a great experience. Parents and parents in law came to visit several times-as did friends ( it's amazing how many friends you have when you live in the Caribbean! ) and the time flew past, two years is nothing!

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