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to think I am not a welcome guest?

(266 Posts)
Oakmaiden Sun 07-Aug-16 18:24:03

so, we left organising our family holiday until the last minute, because we were expecting extra funds which took a long time getting to us. In fact we finally got them on Friday.

If they had arrived last month (which was when we were expecting them) we would have probably booked our first foreign family holiday (children are 10, 12 and 18, so rather overdue!), but they didn't, so we didn't. When it was clear that wasn't going to be an option we then planned to go camping near to where my parent live. However, their continued non-arrival meant we had to cancel that plan too. When I phoned my parents to let them know, my Mum said "Your dad said, why not come and camp in our garden?". We can't stay in their house as my mother has a guest already. OK. It's an idea - we have camped in their garden before.

My sister also offers to put us up - but she has a two up two down (with two children and a dog (and I understand no hot water or flushing loos)) but crucially she is suggesting we sleep in her bedroom and she sleeps downstairs on the sofa. I am not desperately happy about the idea of putting her out of her bed on our behalf. So I was planning on sending the youngest two children over there (10 and 12, so not weenys), putting the 18 year old to sleep in mum and dad's shed, and for dh and I to sleep in Mum and Dad's garden, in a tent. Not ideal, but it is doable, because it is only for a couple of nights.

It is worth mentioning at this point that Mum was quite put out when we said we weren't camping after all and may not be able to come, as she was planning a "family lunch" one of the days so we could all see her guest (very old family friend - I haven't seen her for about 15 years).

Anyway - I said to my mum today "I was wondering if we could have a BBQ on Monday - or would you prefer us to buzz off and eat elsewhere?". She said - "Sorry, I would rather you didn't come round for supper." Now - whilst it is not a huge big deal, it has really underlined to me the fact she really doesn't want my family over there at all (other than to parade in front of her friend at her "family lunch". So I really think we should be trying to find somewhere else to stay. I'm right, aren't I?

That said - I am worried about all of us descending upon my poor sister. I was happier at the idea of us all camping out in her sitting room, but I don't think she is going to let us. I think we are going to have to take her bedroom. I think she is a bit embarrassed by her sitting room, and I am a bit embarrassed to take her room. So I am not sure what to do.

PS the unwelcome guest is at my mum's - I don't think I am unwelcome at my sisters, but I feel embarrassed to put her to so much hassle...

ChatterNatterer Sun 07-Aug-16 18:26:34

This doesn't sound like a holiday at all confused

mrsfuzzy Sun 07-Aug-16 18:28:01

as mum has the sulks i'd opt for your sisters place, it'll be busy but could be fun,

OnlyHereForTheCamping Sun 07-Aug-16 18:28:39

Go to a campsite

cansu Sun 07-Aug-16 18:29:13

This is not a holiday. This is you and your family staying with your family when they either are not keen or don't have the space. If you want to go camping go to a camp site.

Lucked Sun 07-Aug-16 18:29:17

Well. Agree it sounds like she doesn't want you around the house much but perhaps it is the timing with the other guest.

It really doesn't sound much like a holiday at all to me, treading n others toes. Now you have funds, which could have funded a holiday abroad, can't you get an official camp site?

usual Sun 07-Aug-16 18:29:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FinnMcCool Sun 07-Aug-16 18:29:39

If you got the required funds on Friday, why can't you book a last minute holiday today?

The camping and all staying in different places doesn't sound great tbh.

bleedingnora Sun 07-Aug-16 18:29:59

Er don't think I'd be going to either it sounds awful!

If he finds are now through cant you book an actual campsite last minute? (And miles away from your mum!)

mrsfuzzy Sun 07-Aug-16 18:30:00

no it doesn't sound like a holiday at all but at least you will have a base to go out and do stuff, or, you could save your dosh and book something in this country, haven or the like, will still be cheaper than going aboard.

hotdiggedy Sun 07-Aug-16 18:31:04

Its very easy. You book a last minute holiday. What fun!

Amelie10 Sun 07-Aug-16 18:31:37

I wouldn't go to either even though your sister does sound she minds much. They both don't sound like holidays though, pretty shit infact. Your parents actually suggested your'll sleep in their garden?? I wouldn't be going there in a hurry.

Stevefromstevenage Sun 07-Aug-16 18:32:02

Is there any chance their is a local campsite, seriously this is just too much pressure for you to be a holiday.

gamerchick Sun 07-Aug-16 18:32:04

Go to a campsite man what you're describing is not a holiday. Or book a caravan somewhere now you have the money.

Stevefromstevenage Sun 07-Aug-16 18:32:19

Their = there oops

mrsfuzzy Sun 07-Aug-16 18:32:55

wheeling your family out on parade for dm to 'show off' sounds like hard work imo, is she a drama llama normally ? perhaps she's just disappointed.

AtSea1979 Sun 07-Aug-16 18:33:14

I wouldn't go at all and just relax at home and have cheap days out

FlyingElbows Sun 07-Aug-16 18:33:40

The camping sounds bloody awful but I maybe wouldn't go as far as calling you an unwanted guest as much as very difficult to accommodate. Why not just go to a travel agent and see if they can rustle you up a proper holiday.

TheGruffaloMother Sun 07-Aug-16 18:34:04

Honestly, holiday or not I'd really rather stay home than 'holiday' to my parents' back garden or a sibling's 2 up 2 down. Book yourself a campsite.

ImperialBlether Sun 07-Aug-16 18:34:12

That's not a holiday for anyone, especially your son who has to sleep in a shed!

CinderellaFant Sun 07-Aug-16 18:34:32

I wouldn't go- look on ice lolly. Com for teletext holidays and get a last minute holiday abroad and have a week relaxing by the pool rather than worrying about upsetting someone!

NewNameNotTheSame Sun 07-Aug-16 18:34:45

Not sure why you can't camp/hotel/find a last minute abroad deal if you now have money to do so? No way is it a holiday, no way can you pass it off as one. Sounds like one massive pain in the arse, for everyone involved

lanbro Sun 07-Aug-16 18:34:59

Get a last minute abroad, there are loads, I've been looking obsessively!

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Sun 07-Aug-16 18:34:59

Your mum doesn't want the company of her GC and her daughter. Very strange.
Yes it might be a squeeze in your sisters but at least you'll be welcome, and It's only for a short while

TuppencePenny Sun 07-Aug-16 18:35:32

I don't know why you would consider doing any of this! You have the money now can't you just meet your family for a meal and book a holiday or pay for a campsite? Reading where everyone is going to be and how cramped everything sounds makes me feel like I'm about to have a migraine it sounds horrific.

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