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To keep quiet and let her contact me?

(20 Posts)
blondieblondie Sat 06-Aug-16 21:34:41

I bumped someone's car while parking, six months ago. I asked in a nearby shop if anyone knew who the car belonged to and was directed to flats across the street, so went and knocked the door and found the owner. As I had only been insured for less than three months, I said if she was okay with it, I'd rather settle without going through my insurance as my excess alone is £375. She was hesitant at first, in case I did a runner, but agreed.

I went back again a couple of days later with some flowers and so that she knew I could be trusted. She said she would get a relative of a relative to look at it and get back to me. A few weeks passed and she texted to say she's been unwell, etc. but the car had been looked at and he quoted about £250. I said that was fine, get the quote sent to me, or tell me the garage and I'd pop in. She said she'd get the quote sent to me.

Another few weeks passed and she texted me in April asking if I'd received the quote, which I hadn't. She said she'd check if he had actually sent it and if not she was going to go elsewhere, tyoical man, etc. She would give me an update the following day. All fine by me.

I've heard nothing since then. Should I wait and see if I ever hear from her again or should I get in touch? I'm starting to feel bad about not contacting her, but I'm hardly desperate to hand over the cash blush

PhloppysFonics Sat 06-Aug-16 22:14:08

Wait for her to contact you. You've done more than most would to be available and to show remorse and willingness to pay for the damage. Keep the cash ready to hand over but don't push it.

lilydaisyrose Sat 06-Aug-16 22:41:22

Yes just wait.

I scraped my neighbour's new (to hin) car a couple of years ago now - I fessed up and we discussed it. We agreed that anything under £400 I was happy to not go through insurance and pay the bill directly. He rang me about 5 weeks later to say he hadn't had time to do anything about it but was going to go to the garage that week. About 3 months later he came to my door with quotes near £1,000 (all verbal, nothing written) and I said that in that case I'd like to go through our insurance. He still lives next door, we see him everyday and he's never mentioned it since!!

I couldn't even see a scrape/dent but he's really precious about his car!

blondieblondie Sat 06-Aug-16 22:47:02

But Lily, you wouldn't be able to go through insurance at that point, would you? And then they could cancel the policy if they heard you hadn't reported it at the time. I kind of feel like she's got me over a barrel now, in that respect. She could come back with a massive quote and I'd have no option but to pay. So part of me wants to get it settled, with proof of payment, etc.

Fluffsnuts Sat 06-Aug-16 22:49:59

I'd wait. You've done your legal requirement. She has 6 years to claim off your insurance. You did notify them didn't you?

blondieblondie Sat 06-Aug-16 22:52:36

No, I didn't blush

FeelingSmurfy Sat 06-Aug-16 22:54:26

What if she has lost your number?

lilydaisyrose Sat 06-Aug-16 22:59:52

Yes you're probably right - I can't remember how we left it but I did say that it was too expensive and I think I said I'd have to consider what to do (ie phone insurer) and he has never ever pursued it (lucky me). If he'd actioned it quickly, then I would have paid/gone through insurance, but it took him months and therefore he lost the upper hand I think. I was lucky but I wasn't just going to pay any random amount he could come up with.

I would sit tight. I think it's unlikely your insurance would be cancelled in the example of you reporting an accident some time ago (I'm not sure what the situation is with late reporting an accident, but we can't be the only ones) but I do understand you just want it sorted.

I've actually remembered another time, about 15 years ago when I bumped into someone's car in Ikea car park (going about 10mph) and smashed the headlight. I couldn't see for the sun in my eyes. We exchanged details and he rang with a quote but never ever followed it up with a request for payment. It sounds like I'm an awful driver, but I'm really not, but I have been driving for 20 odd years!!

Was her car in good condition? The reason I ask is that I got a note from someone who has bashed into my driver's door a few years back, outside my house. I didn't ring the guy as my car was full of bumps and scrapes (not all my fault, I had an old car!) and due to be scrapped the following year. Therefore, I appreciated the note being left, but didn't pursue it.

blondieblondie Sat 06-Aug-16 23:02:58

FeelingSmurfy I guess that's a possibility, but she'd have to have lost her phone too, and she also wrote down my number and address, and she gave my address to the guy quoting her.

Lily, sorry, but can you clarify, did you report your bump with the neighbour to your insurers?

blondieblondie Sat 06-Aug-16 23:03:50

And her car was okay (to my novice eye). About 13 years old, but looked decent enough

lilydaisyrose Sat 06-Aug-16 23:04:08

No I didn't.

lilydaisyrose Sat 06-Aug-16 23:06:21

I have a 9/10 year old car now but wouldn't pursue someone for a small bump/scrape/dent. A big bash to a panel or door, yes. But I'm really not precious about my car.

I think you've done what you need to do.

Sleeplessinmybedroom Sat 06-Aug-16 23:08:06

I once reversed into someone's very low hard to see wall and knocked some bricks out. There was no one home so I left a note through the door with my details. A man rang me later that day absolutely raging at me for being so stupid to reverse into the wall (it was about 3 bricks high so not visible at all to me) and that he was fed up with having to rebuild it because of idiots like me. I asked him to send me 3 quotes and I'd pay to repair the wall but he never got back to me.

blondieblondie Sat 06-Aug-16 23:09:05

Thanks Lily. I've retread and realise you meant calling them nearer the time but still out with the 24 hours, not 6 months!

Arkwright Sat 06-Aug-16 23:10:13

You must report all incidents to your insurer whether you intend to claim or not. If they find out they could cancel your insurance and then you will have to declare that to your new insurance companies forever.

AnotherPrickInTheWall Sun 07-Aug-16 00:22:36

My car was bumped about 18 months ago. The driver was full of apologies and I said I was fine about it, but owing to the small amount of damage to my newish car plus not wanting the hassle of going through the insurance and my premium going up I asked if he's be okay for him to pay for the damage.
We exchanged numbers and it was a good six weeks before I had the repairs done . I texted him to say the car was in the body shop and he promptly paid them the bill of £150. It was a win win situation. No one lost their no claims and he was probably better of by about £350-400 than if we had gone though the insurance.
If my car was old and of little value I would have probably not even bothered to get it fixed.
I'd put the money aside in the event she does come back to you.

FeelingSmurfy Sun 07-Aug-16 02:31:30

Didn't know she had your address but even just in the past week I have seen two post by friends on Facebook saying they have lost all their contacts, happens for a variety of reasons like swapping sim, phone breaking, factory reset etc

If she has your address then I would just wait and see, actually I would have been hounding her until it was sorted, but that's me and that's not what I think somebody else should do!

WalkingInTheAir13 Sun 07-Aug-16 06:48:30

You are completely correct.
Another important point: you should never admit liability even if the accident/damage is clearly your fault. Insurance and car details should be exchanged in a business-like manner and nothing more.
This does not stop you settling a claim outside your insurance should you decide to do so later.

LottieL Sun 07-Aug-16 06:53:15

If you aren't claiming through insurance don't let them know. If you let them know they will record it as a fault accident on your report and it will bump your premiums up as though you've had a claim. If you let them know then later on need to claim they will just record it and move on. They won't cancel your policy.

Used to work in car insurance. It happens everyday and no one even cares.

HandbagCrazy Sun 07-Aug-16 09:09:21

Lottie is right, if you report an accident late no one at your insurance will care. And yes, if you report, it will be added as a claim and your renewal will increase.

Another thing to keep in mind is your policy excess is payable on your damage only, so if you do go through insurance for her damage but don't claim for yours, you won't have to pay it.

Personally I would wait for her to get in touch and go from there

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