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To think this is black humour?

(28 Posts)
TheWorriedTalrus Thu 04-Aug-16 21:50:55

Doctor friend just described their job as looking after 'demented old people'... Feel a bit hmm about this!! Normally v nice but don't know her that well yet!

WorraLiberty Thu 04-Aug-16 21:54:48

Well we don't know her at all, so your guess is a good as ours confused

Gingeete Thu 04-Aug-16 21:55:43

She is probably right.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys Thu 04-Aug-16 21:56:47

Does she look after elderly people with dementia?

LaurieFairyCake Thu 04-Aug-16 21:57:37

Yes, I would hear it as descriptive.

As in 'old people who are dementing'. Most gps clients are the elderly.

Cynara Thu 04-Aug-16 21:59:09

Sounds reasonable to me. Although I'm an HCP so lost touch with appropriate humour a long time ago.

TheWorriedTalrus Thu 04-Aug-16 22:00:18

Ok I wasnt sure if it was offensive or not. But can see how it is actually a fair description!

mummymummums Thu 04-Aug-16 22:01:50

I think with some jobs you get jaded, and the only way to get through with a smile is with black humour. Sure she's still the nice person you thought she was.

BestZebbie Thu 04-Aug-16 22:04:01

The appropriateness of the word probably depends on whether she works with dementia patients or just with old people who can sometimes irritate her with their foibles a bit.

anyname123 Thu 04-Aug-16 22:05:00

Bit confused.....Looking after demented old people is probably a very apt description of what she does, why has this offended / upset you?

Mintychoc1 Thu 04-Aug-16 22:05:31

I'm a medic and I would use the term "demented" as a clinical description, not to be disrespectful or derisory.

Womenareliketeabags Thu 04-Aug-16 22:08:21

As a nurse that is nothing compared to some of the things said daily in my staff room. Hideous humour is the only way to survive the day sometimes. It's laugh or cry

DisgraceToTheYChromosome Thu 04-Aug-16 22:10:03

DW's patients are old, demented, but still people. Possibly not the word order I would choose.

hareagain Thu 04-Aug-16 22:10:27

Yep, have dementing grandparents who seem to constantly have a gp appointment coming up and I'm not offended by that.

Jeffjefftyjeff Thu 04-Aug-16 22:13:50

I know professors and psychiatrists who work with dementia patients and they use the phrases 'demented ' and 'dementing ' a lot. At first it sounded offensive but now I realise it must be the clinical term. They care tremendously about those with dementia.

PacificDogwod Thu 04-Aug-16 22:16:58

It's an accurate description for a lot that I do (GP - 2 half days every week at local care homes with dementia units).

How would you describe older people who are losing their cognitive function? confused

Not to be confused with "DS's trumpet practice is making me demented" - that's a less appropriate use of the word IMO.

Sidge Thu 04-Aug-16 22:21:14

Well, people with dementia are demented.

It's just a descriptor. Like people with diabetes are diabetic.

I'm a HCP.

Fluffsnuts Thu 04-Aug-16 22:22:41

Demented is the correct term for someone with dementia. I use it regularly in my job.

Used incorrectly it can be an offensive term though.

dudsville Thu 04-Aug-16 22:24:27

She doesn't mean demented in the popular sense of the word but she's being accurate.

SoftSheen Thu 04-Aug-16 22:24:40

Just sounds like just a literal description to me. She may work specifically with the elderly, or may be a GP with a high number of elderly patients. I would assume she was using 'demented' as a medical term and not as a poor attempt at humour, unless there was reason to think otherwise.

WhimsicalWinnifred Thu 04-Aug-16 22:26:45

If they are demented or have dementia, what's the issue? Sorry... can't get offended by that.

YabuDabbaDoo Thu 04-Aug-16 22:27:46

"Demented" is an appropriate word, though. I didn't realise this until I looked after a family member with dementia. A locum said "yes she's quite demented, isn't she?" and I was hmmbut as more and more HCPs used the word, I realised it was an accurate description of her condition, rather than a comment on her personality!

YabuDabbaDoo Thu 04-Aug-16 22:30:16

Now I go hmm when someone says "are you demented?" over something non-clinical, eg a decision to buy another round of tequila chasers

Greenteandchives Thu 04-Aug-16 22:35:36

I would probably have said elderly people with dementia. Just sounds a bit more respectful.

lougle Thu 04-Aug-16 22:44:29

'Older people' is now the phrase of choice, with 'elderly' and 'old' both being considered derogatory. But 'demented' is a medical descriptor.

I agree that it would be more...decorous...to say 'I work with older people who have dementia'.

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