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To feel terrified

(29 Posts)
IJustAteTheKidsFoodAgain Thu 04-Aug-16 09:31:40

Ok IABU because this is what they want, but I'm going to London today with DD and I'm scared. I suffer from low level anxiety and the latest knife attack has me really on edge, determined to go anyway because I don't want to give in to fear. how do others cope with these situations? I think it's worse because I rarely go to London so it always seems like a 'big deal' IYSWIM

Amelie10 Thu 04-Aug-16 09:36:39

We cope by getting on with our lives. If London is where you live, how do you think people should avoid going out and carrying on with your ordinary life? You can only be more vigilant but other than that you just get on with it.

Eebahgum Thu 04-Aug-16 09:39:59

Rational thoughts - there are billions of people in London. You're very unlikely to be involved in an attack. Attacks rarely seen to happen 2 days in a row so today is marginally safer. You're more likely to be injured in a car crash but it doesn't stop you driving around every day.

BakewellSliceAgain Thu 04-Aug-16 09:46:33

I think if you look at events in Germany and France the chances are there may be an attack anywhere not just London.

My way of thinking is that It's not fair to children to pass on our anxieties. It would be wrong to stay home if you can get out and about.

I definitely faked confidence in the past to the point I am fairly confident once I get started on something that has caused me anxiety. Focus on what you want to get out of the day.

IJustAteTheKidsFoodAgain Thu 04-Aug-16 09:47:34

Thank you, it helps to hear this. I know it's been done to death, I'm worse because I don't want to put my dd in danger but, it's true that I put her in more danger every day with my questionable driving

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Thu 04-Aug-16 09:50:25

It does make me stop and think but can't dwell on it apart from sympathy for the innocents involved or how do we function? Have a good day out.

wowfudge Thu 04-Aug-16 09:50:58

DP works in London OP - he said he's never seen so many armed police as yesterday when I rang him this morning to check he was okay. There are likely to be even more present today to reassure the public.

AnchorDownDeepBreath Thu 04-Aug-16 09:53:03

London is heaving with police.

Regardless, it's another day. London is more impacted by Victoria being screwed up. Everyone is being vigilant. You'll be fine. Try not to give this too much headspace - just think a few steps ahead. You need to go get X train, you need to get off at X station, have your tickets for the barrier, get X tubeline, etc. Stay calm.

Have a good day.

LaConnerie Thu 04-Aug-16 10:05:39

I understand how you feel, and the fact is, if you don't live in London or visit regularly, the thought of going there atm feels worse.

I was in London recently and didn't want to freak out the DC by passing on my anxieties, so rather than let on I wanted to avoid the tube, I planned all our travel around the city by bus - telling them it was because it was a good way to see more of London - which it was actually. Even DH didn't catch on grin. We had a fab day and I'm sure you will too xx

rogueantimatter Thu 04-Aug-16 10:07:12

My teenage children are going to London to take part in two separate events in a high-profile venue and I share your anxiety. But there was a terrorist attack in Glasgow a few years ago (car drove into the Glasgow airport building by a terrorist). It could in theory happen anywhere.

600 extra armed police have been deployed to London from yesterday.

Once you're there and doing your thing I'm sure you'll have a lovely time. You're being a good parent by taking your DD out for a fun day trip. Better for her than being sat in front of a screen. Best wishes from a fellow anxious mum.

Cutecat78 Thu 04-Aug-16 10:13:49

How is the bus safer than the tube confused

Bus was blown up in the 7/7 attacks....

nancy75 Thu 04-Aug-16 10:16:32

Lots of these attacks are just random nutters and I'm afraid you get random nutters everywhere

IJustAteTheKidsFoodAgain Thu 04-Aug-16 10:17:19

Oh thank you all, I was nearly as scared posting in AIBU but anchor you have made a good point and it's great to hear what it's actually like there today. My DD loves the tube so I think I will see how I feel when I get there. Rogue it must be worse if you aren't with them, bet they're having a great time though!

outputgap Thu 04-Aug-16 10:18:40

I lived on the street where the knife attacked happened, so I also had the bombed bus on my road (Southampton Row becomes Woburn Place at the Sq) when I lived there. But I also saw two people killed nearby in traffic accidents. Which is an awkward way of saying that we are giving these attacks (and it doesnt appear to be terror related anyway) way more attention than they deserve compared to other causes of death.

Approximately 1 person dies in an industrial accident in the UK every day. This doesn't get reported nearly as much. We'd be all terrified of going to work presumably if it did.

MammouthTask Thu 04-Aug-16 10:19:34

You do realise though that the place your dd is the most in danger is at home? because that's where most of the accidents happen etc....

You need to remember the very very low level of risk. One person died yesterday. It's obvioulsy too much for that person or her family.
But it's one over 8.6 millions people living in London. That's a pretty low risk!

outputgap Thu 04-Aug-16 10:21:04

So have a nice day and make sure you don't cross the road until you see the green man! Much more dangerous!

randomer Thu 04-Aug-16 10:21:36

I almost wonder if the publicity is encouraging random nutters

Hulababy Thu 04-Aug-16 10:23:05

But it's not been stated its a terrorist attack has it?
Just because the attacker is described a dark skinned by one witness doesn't mean it is necessarily terrorism.
It may or may not be related.
It may or may not be a random killing.
It may or may not be a victim known to the victim.

BBC are not saying either was as yet.

frenchielala Thu 04-Aug-16 10:24:07

Try not to think about it and enjoy your trip. 1000's of people have already taken the tube and bus today just fine and 1000's more will take it during the course of the day.

There are beautiful blue skies out, your daughter is going to love it!

LaConnerie Thu 04-Aug-16 10:25:58

cutecat why the piss-taking face? hmm

My point was, somebody suffering with anxiety may find it less stressful to be in the open air on and off buses than underground in a crowed tube.

Tollygunge Thu 04-Aug-16 10:26:39

Spare a thought for us who live/work in central London. we have to get on with it- I can't keep my daughter in for the whole six weeks! It's a nice day today, enjoy it

YesAnastasia Thu 04-Aug-16 10:40:27

I have anxiety when there isn't stuff like this on the news so when there is, my DH's hotel is yards from Russell Sq and he has to get the train home tonight, I feel so scared.

It doesn't help when your world is small (I'm a SAHM) and you don't get to see the billions of times people go about their business WITHOUT getting killed in horrific circumstances.

If you google 'dealing with terrorism anxiety' there are loads of articles that really help to put everything into perspective and explain rationally the levels of risk. I read them all the time (sometimes twice over) and they are slowly going in and helping. At the very least, they give you something to do in moments of severe panic.

Hope it's a lovely day and once you've done it safely, it will be easier next time x

yorkshapudding Thu 04-Aug-16 10:55:14

You're probably safer in London today than anywhere else as it's teeming with armed police and everyone will be hyper-vigilant.

Also, it's worth remembering that avoidance fuels anxiety in the long run. So the best way of helping yourself is to carry on as normal, although I appreciate that isn't easy.

OhMrBadger Thu 04-Aug-16 11:07:34

Poor you, anxiety is so cruel. Perhaps I've not fully understood your OP, but is your fear to do with the likelihood of being caught in a terrorist attack, or is it less specific?

As far as I've read, there hasn't been any official statement linking last night's stabbing to terrorism. All I've read is that the person arrested has 'known mental health issues'. That sort of incident happens quite frequently (think of all those crime dramas - the ideas come from somewhere!). Imagine if the incident had happened in another city in the UK...would it make you feel as anxious?

The media are all over this and trying to whip us up into a terrified frenzy. To sell papers. That thought is worth bearing in mind.

MissHooliesCardigan Thu 04-Aug-16 11:10:53

Please try not to worry although I know it's not always that easy. And I can confirm that London is swarming with Police atm. DD goes to central London with friends a lot but there have been a couple of times recently when I've tried to discourage her as I felt uneasy about it.
Then I tried to be rational about it. 8 million people live in London. Several million commute in every day. London gets around 20 million visitors a year. It has been over 9 years since the last terrorist attack. I'm pretty rubbish at maths but even I can work out that, for any individual in London, their chances of being caught up in a terrorist attack are several million to one.
Enjoy your day.

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