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AIBU?

To all that love their MIL - No haters allowed!!

108 replies

Crankyblob · 29/07/2016 21:00

13 years ago I could have written a thousand mumsnet threads about my MIL. (I probably did!)

How I felt undermined by her mothering advice, how she would take DD for the day and not tell me where she was going only to Coke home and tell me they had been to the seaside... So much like the threads I see all the time here! I could make her sound like a right dragon if I wanted to and at the time I thought deservedly so!

With 13 years hindsight and practically no relationship left! I realise that even though she got plenty wrong, she loved her GC with all her heart. I took a beautiful relationship away from both her and my DC simply because I "as the DC mum" had final say and wanted to butt heads with her on everything!

I know they are not all perfect but it would be great to have a thread with some nice MIL stories!!

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Whatsername17 · 29/07/2016 21:04

I love my mil. She drives me insane though. Grin

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KellyBoo800 · 29/07/2016 21:04

My MIL is brilliant. She doesn't interfere, doesn't step on anyone's toes, and has a filthy sense of humour. My kinda lady!

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Arfarfanarf · 29/07/2016 21:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RumbleMum · 29/07/2016 21:09

Mine's great. She can be a challenging personality and drives my DH nuts sometimes, but we seem to have arrived at a very good understanding and she's SO helpful and really gives me a break.

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PuntasticUsername · 29/07/2016 21:10

My MIL is great. We see eye to eye on most things and when we don't, she's very open to talking about our differences and getting things resolved. Given that she and FIL look after our DC for a day every week, this is important! He is equally fab, btw, and they both love our DC to bits and have great relationships with them. I honestly couldn't ask for anything more.

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SilkyGreyCat · 29/07/2016 21:14

My MIL is brilliant. She loves DD so much, and always says yes to looking after her if she can.

She also tells DH off and makes him do things like shower or feed our cat if I've nagged him too much and he's tuned out.

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JohnLithgowsLargeForehead · 29/07/2016 21:16

Mine is awesome! I love her company.. She's so easy going, intelligent, funny, loving, doesn't intrude or interfere and she really likes me! I feel very lucky after reading some of the stuff on here.

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happypoobum · 29/07/2016 21:17

My first MIL was angelic. She offered wise advice but was never forceful about it. She respected me and was caring and thoughtful. I loved staying at her house, and accepted that she preferred that to ever coming to ours. I was dreadfully sad when she passed away, it was a great loss.

Second MIL was a total bitch though Grin

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Okkitokkiunga · 29/07/2016 21:18

I love my MiL. She lives on her own so can be a bit stuck in her ways and we don't get to see her that often - we live in a different country, but when we do see her she makes us so welcome in her home. She loves her GC and I think she quite likes me too. Last year when she came to stay with us she told me off for spoiling my DH - her son Grin

We have our moments when she annoys me - I annoy her too.
She has always been ready to help out when needed, my DD was the first GC and she never once stepped on my toes and never has. She has always had the attitude that I am Mummy therefore what I say goes.
Best of all, she has a brilliant sense of humour. Today we celebrated her 65th birthday and I hope we celebrate a hell of a lot more!

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YorkieDorkie · 29/07/2016 21:19

Wonderful MIL, kind and selfless. Basically my second mum Star.

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Lizzylou · 29/07/2016 21:19

I love my Mil, she adores my DC and is so thoughtful and caring. She would do anything for us. She raised an amazing son too, I hope I can do as good a job.

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Happydappy99 · 29/07/2016 21:20

Mine isn't technically my MIL anymore as I divorced her idiot son but she is absolutely amazing. She helped me through the divorce and has always stood up for me with my ex. I'm closer to her than I am my own mum!

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SciFiFan2015 · 29/07/2016 21:22

My MIL is amazing. When DH and I got engaged she sent me a 4-page letter letting me know how delighted she was and that after meeting me "she hoped that her son would propose" I've still got the letter.
I love her. We annoy each other sometimes but we love each other and love the same people. My own Mum died when I was 8 so this relationship is very important to me. I've never called her Mum although I'd love to. I've written it down a few times. One day I'll call her that.
She's awesome. I'm proud we're both Mrs SciFiFans and that we're related. Her son's awesome too.

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wheresthel1ght · 29/07/2016 21:23

My MIL died when DD was just 9 weeks old. It breaks my heart to know that she will grow up not receiving that adoration from her Grandma. Her half brother and sister adored their Grandma, she was a huge part of their lives.

My own mum pays sod all interest in her. She pays lipservice but that is about it. And does most of the things I read about on here that MIL's are panned for. My MIL on the other hand was the signle biggest support when I was pregnant, she held my hair when I couldn't breathe for being sick, she would make 20 different meals just tofind something I could actually keep down. When my own mum refused to enterain looking at prams 'because it was too early' MIL dragged me round EVERY pram shop within a 50 mile radius. She cam clothes shopping, cot shopping - everything my mum should have wanted to do with me. She was amazing!!!!! She was quite elderly and very disabled - it must have caused her a huge amount of pain and yet she kept going!

She never once imposed her opinions, never over stepped etc. She did have 2 other DIL's and DP's exw (who hated her) so I guess she was well practiced!

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Crankyblob · 29/07/2016 21:24

Grin Smile

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strawberrybootlace · 29/07/2016 21:24

My MIL was wonderful. An interesting, principled and wise woman. She never interfered or judged, even when we made spectacular mistakes as new parents, but gave great advice when we asked for it (which we often did). In hindsight she must have had iron self control...

I miss her increasingly as our children grow older and she will be my role model if I ever become a MIL myself. Our kids have missed out on getting to know her, which makes me very sad.

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SpecialStains · 29/07/2016 21:25

Mine is lovely. Bonkers, but dotes on her grandchildren and is obviously where DH gets a lot of his kind and caring traits from.

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picklypopcorn · 29/07/2016 21:25

Absolutely adore mine! Recently she was throwing out a load of clothes and she gave me about 6 BINBAGS full of clothes to try on :) I walked away from he house with an entirely new wardrobe! Grin

She's supportive and lovely and even after I lived with her for a year I still think she's awesome!

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cingolimama · 29/07/2016 21:26

My MIL was fantastic. She would regularly bellow at my husband "I hope you realise you're a lucky man!".

From the beginning she welcomed me and made me feel loved and an integral part of the family. She laughed at my jokes, was interested in my work, and took me off for lunch and a pedicure when I was feeling schlubby.

I loved to cook for her, and her favourite dish was a very simple spaghetti carbonara. Every single time I made it, she'd taste it, put her fork down and pause and then say "you know, I think this is the best you've ever made". This went on for twenty years.

I'm welling up writing this, as I miss her very much.

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Katsite · 29/07/2016 21:26

Long live my MIL! She did a great job with DH, she was instrumental in raising my DCs over various continents and she has been like a second mother to me.

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JamieVardysParty · 29/07/2016 21:26

I adore mine. We've become very close in the past year as we moved to the same country as PIL and we're the only "kids" they have here.

She backs me rather than just believing DH is her PFB - she's fully aware that he doesn't always think. She really does treat me like another daughter and is always bigging me up and making me think I can do anything.

It's been really lovely at a time when I live so far away from my own mum.

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Crankyblob · 29/07/2016 21:27

So nice to hear Nice MIL stories. I wish i had never pushed against mine for long. She never sent me a letter though!! What a lovely thing to do!

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MsJamieFraser · 29/07/2016 21:28

Mine is lovely, she at times annoys the life out of me, and i mostly likely do her, but I wouldn't change her for the world, she's better than my own mum.

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thequeenofsandwich · 29/07/2016 21:28

I love my mother in law. She passed away 11yrs ago but I'll always be grateful for the impact she had on my life. A strong woman who always spoke her mind. The backbone of the family. Called a spade a spade. And treated my sons as grandsons even though technically they weren't. Worshipped my daughter but never interfered. RIP Jean

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CarpeJugulum · 29/07/2016 21:29

I have never hated mine in any manner, shape or form because she is awesome. Part of the reason I knew I'd marry DH is because, on the first visit to her home when I stayed overnight, she left me a cup of coffee outside with correct milking and sweetening and only knocked gently to tell me. DH's was left in the kitchen and he had to get up, while I got more time (at her insistence!).

I have warned DH that if we ever divorce, I'm getting his family - and he can have mine which is a whole other can of worms!

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