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I'm so sick of feeling guilty and paranoid all the time!

(4 Posts)
TuppencePenny Thu 28-Jul-16 10:38:58

Does anyone else have this problem? I think I have some form of anxiety.

I was part of a friendship of three and one of the people treated the two of us very badly so the two of us drifted from the other. I then kind of felt bad for the one who treated us badly as we had been friends for years previously and reached out the the friend who had treated us badly. Nothing major just asked him to go for a drink and it was fine but he appeared to be really struggling with work and life in general and it was a bit sad. He's had a drug problem and that's why he's been treating people badly.

My problem is now I feel I've betrayed the other friend by meeting this other one. He was horrible to my nice friend. I don't want to eel caught in the middle but feel like I shouldn't have met the other friend and feel guilty about that.

Is it normal to feel this anxious about situations like this? I don't want to let down my lovely friend or feel like I'm betraying him but sadly I think I have made a mistake and I should have left well alone and now I look two faced for reaching out to someone who hurt us both.

Sorry to ramble don't know where else to turn.

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TuppencePenny Thu 28-Jul-16 10:44:43

As a bit of background I often feel paranoid that someone has fallen out with me and I have offended someone so don't know if this is part of that or if I have genuinely made a faux pas.

glasshouses88 Thu 28-Jul-16 10:50:49

You sound as though you may have low self esteem.
You made a choice to go and see an old friend because you had been friends for many years, so I take it there must have been a time when he was lovely before he began being nasty. He was wrong to be nasty to anyone but if other things were going on in his life his behaviour would have been influenced by that. Sometimes we need to give people second or even third chances if they are deserving.
Your other friend should understand, your not at school and as an adult you are allowed to make decisions without seeking approval from others. You weren't hurting anybody.
Your OK, and sound as though you are trying to be a good friend.

TuppencePenny Thu 28-Jul-16 22:04:37

Thank you for your reply. I think I do have self esteem issues. I'm not sure why as on the outside there are no obvious reasons why but then I suppose that's the way with anything. I wish I could control my paranoia but don't know how to go about it. Hearing your objective opinion does help though.

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