Apparently I'm tight for not letting DD have a yoghurt instead of her tea!

[TheUnsullied]

She's 2.3. It's a tea she's eaten many times before and a favourite of mine because of the veg hiding potential...chilli con carne with some wholemeal pita bread. She normally wolfs it. She decided not to even touch it, which is fine.

5 minutes later she's asked for a yoghurt. I've said no. If she'd eaten any of her tea she could have had one but she's not having one instead of a meal. I've given her tea back to her and a tantrum has ensued.

I think this is fairly run of the mill with a toddler. DFriend is making out that it's cruel to not give a yoghurt to her because she's not eaten.

[Enjoyingthepeace]

2.3 years old.
Normal wolfs it down.
Didn't fancy it today, but does fancy a yoghurt.
Don't know about you, but sometimes I have days where I don't fancy something i usually relish. No rhyme or reason.

So. Yep, I think YABU

[GeoffreysGoat]

Short term it's mean. Long term it teaches her valuable skills about healthy eating and not wasting food.

[Ihatechoosingnames]

If my DS (same as as your DD) doesn't eat his dinner he gets it given back to him half an hour later. If he still doesn't want it he gets a bit of toast. I think not giving her anything is a bit mean tbh, she's 2. Sometimes you just don't fancy dinner

[TheUnsullied]

And what about when she doesn't fancy the other healthy teas she gets for the next week and asks for cake instead Enjoying?

[QuiteLikely5]

If the child was older I'd say good idea but she's only two and I'd say let her have the yoghurt. It's hot today too so she might WA t something cool

[Enjoyingthepeace]

Then you deal with it then. But as a one off. 2.3 and usually wolfs it down, yep, I'd definitely give her the yoghurt.

As I write this my two are scoffing a plate of broccoli and carrots. I'm not kidding! So my relaxed stance has worked for me

[FloatyFlo]

If my dd doesn't eat her favourite dinner/lunch/tea that she would normally wolf down, it's a sure sign she is coming down with something.

[Enjoyingthepeace]

She's 2.3 Op. Learning lessons etc, not really even on her radar yet

[10storeylovesong]

I made chilli in the slow cooker this morning. The day then became warmer and I don't fancy it so I've had a lighter tea. I suppose I should have just gone to bed hungry...

[TheUnsullied]

I haven't not given her anything though Ihate. She's been given her tea back. If she refuses that and is hungry later I'll offer her toast or similar. Not sugary treats. I really saw this as fairly basic parenting, but it looks like I could be wrong

[Enjoyingthepeace]

Agreed Floaty

[Enjoyingthepeace]

She's 2.3 and usually eats well.
Cut her some slack!

[SteviebunsBottrittrundle]

I would offer her something else if she hasn't eaten as she is still so little. But then, you know her a lot better than I do.

If it was my DD, (who in fairness is only 19mo), I'd probably give her some yoghurt, toast, cereal or something. It's not like she's asking for cake or crisps.

[LaContessaDiPlump]

I'd do the same as you op - 2.3 is old enough to be pushing boundaries deliberately IMO. Stand firm!

[SteviebunsBottrittrundle]

What about plain yoghurt or do you only have the sugary sort? She might just want something cold as pps say.

[CMOTDibbler]

I'd do the same as you OP. You aren't serving the chilli up for the next 4 days and starving her after all!

[Enjoyingthepeace]

Dh will be having marinated salmon and new potatoes. Usually my favourite. I'm not in the mood, so going to have natural yoghurt and raspberries. Pretty sure next time I do the salmon dish, I will be salivating at the prospect.
We're not robots!

[Smurfnoff]

Is a yoghurt really a 'sugary treat'? It's not as if she wants Monster Munch followed by Rowntree's Randoms.

[Thebookswereherfriends]

I'm with you op. If she really doesn't fancy the chilli, then I would offer a banana and a bit of bread and butter, but I wouldn't give a sugary yoghurt. A yoghurt is unlikely to fill her up for long and she'll be asking for something else.

[TheUnsullied]

She's definitely a boundary pusher Contessa she'd be at it for weeks if she caught on that having a tantrum meant there was a chance she could pick her favourite treats for tea.

[whifflesqueak]

I'd do the same as you op.

if it's something cold she wants, she can have her dinner with a glass of milk.

I have one the same age and I refuse to relent when he throws food related tantrums. it just makes it hard to have nice treat foods in the house at all.

[harshbuttrue1980]

Most kids' yogurts are filled with added sugar. I wouldn't give a child junk food after they have turned down a meal, it just encourages the same behaviour in future. They only get the sugary treat after they've eaten the nutritious meal. However, I wouldn't let a child go hungry either, and would offer toast with peanut butter or a banana.

[TheUnsullied]

No plain yoghurt in at the mo Stevie but I've tried swapping it out before now. Plain yoghurt most certainly doesn't cut it for her, she won't touch it once she realises what it is.

[imwithspud]

Yanbu, my dd is a little older (3.10) and I've always had this approach. She's the kind of child who would get given toast/yogurt/etc instead of dinner once, and then expect it every time instead of her dinner and throw an almighty strop to boot. So it's better for everyone to nip it in the bud. Unless she's poorly, she eats what she's given (and sometimes we do ask her what she wants), there's always at least one thing on her plate that she likes. Seems to work well for us.

[quasibex]

YANBU my youngest pulled this on me yesterday. I re-offered her food twice then told her there was nothing else being made.

An hour before bed I offered a plain weetabix in cold milk. She gratefully accepted that once she realised I wasn't backing down on her having something 'nice' (aka yoghurt) for tea rather than the pasta I'd made (sneaky veg version here too and she normally devours it).

To my mind I'm not reinforcing her right to be a fussy eater but she isn't going hungry either. You're not being cruel or unreasonable.