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AIBU?

What do SAHMs do when you're ill?

50 replies

MoonStar07 · 19/07/2016 18:59

I've touchwood been a SAHM for coming up to 3 years and not been ill once. My second baby was poorly and in SCBU for 11 days and between MIL & DH they managed to look after my eldest as I was also poorly in hospital. I was let out for 1 night on day 9 and then brought back transitional care once baby was breathing. Anyway for the first time in 3 years I am so ill today. We have builders in, I've done the nursery run and taken eldest to ballet. Cooked tea. Sink full of dishes no strength to load the washer. Made our tea for tonight. DH is back about 715pm bit later tonight. I have an awful headache runny nose I'm completely exhausted. Obviosily the toddler and the preschooler haven't enjoyed the heat today and are now exhausted I would be bathing Them by now but I feel terrible. I feel like I'm going to be much worse tomorrow I'm literally going to bed same time as kids as toddler wakes every night for me. We have a busy weekend ahead with a family wedding. Anyway what tips for tomorrow? I even resented making the builders tea today and felt so bad because I know they were hot and needed drinks

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MoonStar07 · 19/07/2016 19:00

Is there a SAHM mum board?

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UmbongoUnchained · 19/07/2016 19:01

I was a single stay at home mum. There was nothing I could do really. Just had to man up and get on with it. Although I did palm her off on my brother when I had food poisoning Grin

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Pearlman · 19/07/2016 19:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HummyMummy72 · 19/07/2016 19:02

Oh no hope you feel better soon!

Any family members nearby to help out? DH work quite flexible so if I'm ill he can take a bit of time off thankfully. My parents are an hour away which isn't too bad so they can help out. I've only got 1 DD 9 months but can imagine how hard it is with a toddler!

Builders can help themselves to drinks if you leave bottles of squash out?

Hope you feel better soon Flowers

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cosmicglittergirl · 19/07/2016 19:03

I'm you in reverse! Had a wedding at the weekend, so am knackered from that and have had a head cold since Sunday with a temp. I've had the telly on a lot, paddling pool, endless ice lollies for the kids.
Second the take away idea and cancelling the builders.

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branofthemist · 19/07/2016 19:03

When I was on Mat leave and I'll, I usually just did whatever I could to get through the day. If dh could take the day off he would.

Dh did the same when he was a sahd. Battled through and if I could get the day off I would.

Although once I got the flu, dh was working away and I moved back to mums for 3 days. I felt like I was dying.

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honeysucklejasmine · 19/07/2016 19:03

When I was really ill, I made dh stay home. I figure I will save him loads in staying home when the kids are sick I'm the future. One sick day in six months is ok I reckon.

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MiddleClassProblem · 19/07/2016 19:05

Can your mum help? I'm a sahp and tbh I've always just had to crack on but if I was so ill I couldn't get out of bed or had stuff coming out both end then I would ask my mum (lives 3hrs away) to come and stay. Touch wood not happened yet.

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Judgeaway · 19/07/2016 19:06

I just get on with it I don't have a choice.
No rest for me poorly or not.
Dh can't help as he works away abroad so no way of getting back.
I have 2 dc 1 with special needs

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FlibbertigibbetArmadillo · 19/07/2016 19:07

Ignore the dishes. Skip bathtime and plan for a lazy day tomorrow. The world won't end, the kids won't suffer. Rest as much as you can. If you are too ill for the wedding don't make yourself go.
Hope you feel better soon Flowers

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5minutestobed · 19/07/2016 19:08

Yes if your DH can't take time off then lots of tv, minimal effort food for the kids and you and let them entertain themselves. Hope you feel better soon!

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thenewaveragebear1983 · 19/07/2016 19:08

Grandparents. I've had 9 days of laryngitis, and then the infection has spread to my chest and it developed into pleurisy. I've been desperately poorly to be honest. I finally cracked 3 days ago and point blank refused to do any more child care. I told dh either he or his parents (mine were abroad) needed to be entirely responsible for the children. To be fair they all rallied round, but I had to demand it. Obviously they've lived on crap and the house is a tip, but at least I now feel a bit better and can look after them myself tomorrow. I could feel myself being run into the ground.

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BabyDubsEverywhere · 19/07/2016 19:09

If I am ill DH takes time off. But we have always put home above work and not career minded.

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yomellamoHelly · 19/07/2016 19:10

Just have to grin and bear it. For now do as little as possible, though would consider bath to cool littlies down in hope they sleep better.

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MoonStar07 · 19/07/2016 19:14

Mum too far 3 hrs and owns a business mum on her own with limited staff due to summer hols so can't get away in fact I can't remember last time she ever had time to come see me and help. Maybe I'll ask MIL but for separate reasons cos she's a carer for 2 people she can't really get poorly as then that's a bigger disaster! Builders I'm hoping will survive tomorrow I'm going to tell them I'm poorly can't cancel them cos of schedule. Yes had a wedding last weekend too and this weekend coming. I think if I feel like this tomorrow I might look to put eldest in wraparound short notice so I just have toddler to look after

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NeedACleverNN · 19/07/2016 19:14

Depends how ill.

Feeling rotten and no energy, it's tv, films, easy food and lounging on the sofa.

Completely knocked off my knees and cannot cope, if dh can get the time, he calls in and stays at home with whilst I recuperate

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Lagirafe · 19/07/2016 19:18

It's awful so I sympathise!

I am a single SAHM and I've been ill a couple of times and basically just had to carry on Sad do the minimum and hope it passes quickly. Dose yourself up and get a takeaway instead of cooking.

Leave anything that can wait Flowers

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chocomochi · 19/07/2016 19:18

Sorry to hear you're ill. Hope you feel better soon.

I tend to take paracetamol and ibruprofen regularly (being ill puts me off my food), and wish evening/bedtime would come more quickly. Just have to plough through the day time unfortunately.

Forget the chores and go to bed as soon as the kids are in bed. Paracetamol before bed time to stop you waking up in pain/headaches/fever.

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CakeNinja · 19/07/2016 19:20

Sadly just soldier on I guess? That sounds a bit marty like but actually in my 12 years of being a SAHM I've not been ill enough to justify dp taking an unpaid day off.
Just lucky I suppose!

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DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 19/07/2016 19:26

Cake- me neither,just had to do the bare minimum ,been ill plenty of times though but family live miles away and dh hasn't got the sort of job he can easily take time off of.

There is a SAHP board OP Smile

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MoonStar07 · 19/07/2016 19:29

I feel awful. DH just walked in from work he's going to help put kids to bed then I'm off to bed dosed up!

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Idliketobeabutterfly · 19/07/2016 19:35

I have to carry on regardless. Only time hubby took time off was when I took quick way down stairs last year and couldn't walk and only then he took two days off. I think inlaws helped.

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Luckystar1 · 19/07/2016 19:44

I was ridiculously sick earlier in the year. Could sleep, couldn't move, couldn't eat. DS was 14 months old and I was 3 months pregnant. I couldn't take any medication. It was AWFUL.

After 3 days I called DH crying and begged him to come home early. When he walked in at 4pm I actually cried I was so grateful! We have zero help nearby Sad

But yes, soldiering on is about as much as can be done sadly. But if you have anyone who can help grab them!!

And you have my sympathies, it's really not nice!

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Sonotkylie · 19/07/2016 19:45

Look after yourself! Make/ let builders get own tea (always!!!) and tell them you are ill. Ours used to keep an eye on DS when he napped but they were extra special and that was with no cups of tea! And go with TV and paddling pool and 'picnics' ie cold food you eat with fingers out of packets to avoid washing up

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paddypants · 19/07/2016 19:46

What about a older teenager on holidays? Any living nearby that you could pay to take the kids out of the house for a few hours tomorrow morning? And tv. Lots of tv

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