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To not give my bedroom to visiting relatives?

(65 Posts)
canary1 Sat 16-Jul-16 23:39:40

I am having brother and his wife to stay for a few days. We have our three month old getting up for feeds at night, and my husband and I share this ( lucky me, I know). We have things set up at home with one room which one of us sleeps in with DS, microwave for warming his milk etc. Then other room for whichever one of us is not looking after him, which is on another floor so quieter. We also have smaller room empty, with double bed, which I thought would be fine for brother plus his wife. But he has suggested to me that they would prefer the bigger, quieter room- though he knows the sleeping arrangements, that we are using this room. AIBU to not give them the room? I could just take my clothes etc out and give it to them for the few days? Perhaps I ABU to want to keep our arrangements as they are, and give them smaller room? Btw the smaller room is still a reasonable size, far from being a box room, but does not have am ensuite unlike the two rooms we are using at the moment. Grateful for opinions..,

NickiFury Sat 16-Jul-16 23:41:07

I absolutely would not with a tiny baby as you describe and I would refuse point blank of anyone in this situation offered to do it for me.

honeysucklejasmine Sat 16-Jul-16 23:41:58

He'd "prefer" it would he? Maybe he might prefer a fucking hotel!

Assuming you have a family bathroom for their use, they can get tae fuck!

Mouikey Sat 16-Jul-16 23:42:54

The smaller room is a guest room, they are guests - seems to work perfectly to me! Is it your brother who has asked you to give up your room or your DP suggestion? In any event no guest should dictate where they sleep (unless paying of course!).

Dairybanrion Sat 16-Jul-16 23:43:24

They can feck off. He'd 'prefer' your room. The cheek!

justdontevenfuckingstart Sat 16-Jul-16 23:43:42

Could dh possibly be looking at the room arrangements more long term possibly? As in you and him? and this being a way to change things?

donajimena Sat 16-Jul-16 23:43:47

No. Keep your room. If its far from a box room - great. Even if it was.. tough.
I wouldn't want anyones main bedroom anyway.

Wombat87 Sat 16-Jul-16 23:44:25

Do people really ever have guests who suggest they could dictate where their get to lay their heads? In our house it's a case of 'you sleep where you fall or where we say you can'. And they are always grateful for what they get!!

I don't think you ABU, unless they are offering to do night feeds for you!

EdmundCleverClogs Sat 16-Jul-16 23:44:44

Sounds like the sleeping you've space offered is fine. It has a double bed, what else does his lordship want? Tell your brother to get a grip or get a hotel room. 'He would prefere the bigger room', how bloody old is he hmm.

justdontevenfuckingstart Sat 16-Jul-16 23:44:57

Oh sorry I read that as dh suggesting not brother. Yep brother is a twat.

Lilacpink40 Sat 16-Jul-16 23:46:35

Just say ' sorry it's not convenient' for any suggestions that don't suit you and your family.

Let go of guilt and remember you are a considerate person, not a doormat. smile

Inertia Sat 16-Jul-16 23:46:59

Is there another bathroom elsewhere in the house, or are they worried about walking through the bedrooms you're sleeping in to use the bathroom? If there's another bathroom they can use, then they get what they're given.

Shizzlestix Sat 16-Jul-16 23:52:39

'He'd prefer' when you have a tiny baby?! He can get to fuck!

BluePitchFork Sat 16-Jul-16 23:53:10

no one except me and dh (and ocassionally dc) sleep in my bed.

RunRabbitRunRabbit Sat 16-Jul-16 23:59:16

Why do you think, for even a second, that you should move out of your room? Really why?

You should be posting about what a loon your brother is and asking for how to deal with him.

Does he usually completely take the piss with you? Is this your normal?

pictish Sun 17-Jul-16 00:03:19

I agree - who the hell makes a room request when they are guests in someone else's house, let alone for the master bedroom?
Aye that'll be right tae.

ISuggestYouGoBackThere Sun 17-Jul-16 00:10:44

Well, I actually WOULD have offered the quieter ensuite room to guests for the sake of a couple of days. BUT that dbro has requested this rankles me tbh.

Do as you please.

Mycraneisfixed Sun 17-Jul-16 00:20:16

Your brother is being very rude.

amy85 Sun 17-Jul-16 00:25:58

I wouldn't move baby but I would have originally offered them the other room with the ensuite and then used the smaller room for whichever one of you isn't on baby nightshift

Obeliskherder Sun 17-Jul-16 00:28:25

Offer him the choice of your room and the baby, or the guest room!

Very rude of your brother if the suggestion is his. But why is the spare room so noisy? Is that something you can address at all? Does it have decent curtains?

AdoraBell Sun 17-Jul-16 00:29:34

pictish my MIL. said to DD2 recently "that will be our room when we stay" DD didn't know what to say but I just grinned at the the thought of 2 obese adults in a single bed grin

OP YANBU, your brother is. Do not give up your rooms. You have a perfectly good room for guests.

coconutpie Sun 17-Jul-16 00:30:49

He'd "prefer" your room? What a fucking twat!!! I can't believe he said that to you. I'd be telling him that no, you will not give up your sleeping arrangements for him and if he doesn't like it, tell him that he can pay for a fucking hotel room.

honeyrider Sun 17-Jul-16 00:35:54

Your brother has a horrible sense of entitlement. He really has some cheek. Tell the twat if the spare room doesn't meet his requirements you can recommend a local hotel or B&B. Don't even think of entertaining the idea of moving out of the room.

canary1 Mon 18-Jul-16 21:52:08

Many thanks for your pretty unanimous opinions. I'm going to bit the bullet and give them the perfectly adequate guest room, but I think he'll be surprised as a bit used to being in charge. But I would never want someone to give up their room, let alone when there is a guest room also... I hope I survive the visit! Thanks everyone xxx

Noctilucent Mon 18-Jul-16 21:54:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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