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AIBU?

Nasty mother regarding her son's development.

40 replies

ProundParent2009 · 16/07/2016 13:11

My son is 8 years old and has a wide range of disabilities.

Last week we got the results back from a recent development check from his health care professionals.. It turns out his speech and language is currenty at 8-12 Months and physically 12-18 months.

I am a full time dad however due to court hearing I need to inform his mother of any information regarding our Son and his health care professionals/ Schooling.

I texted her as soon as I found out and she replied " is that it? Why can't he be like a normal 8 year old.. All he does is baby babble and fall over no wonder it's that low"

Since that text our son has turned 8 years old and she hasn't even wished him a happy birthday :/ it feels like she is embarrassed and dissapointed in her son!

AIBU to take her back to court and try and change things? She can see him supervised but hardly shows up and when I give her information regarding our son she is just plain nasty.

OP posts:
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SpeakNoWords · 16/07/2016 13:17

I don't understand what you want to change? You can't force her to be a better parent, sadly. I'd send her the necessary info and try and ignore any response that you get.

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NeedsAsockamnesty · 16/07/2016 13:22

Why do you need to notify her of results?

What does the order actually state?

More usual would be notify of the existence in order to prompt a request to the HCP
or take no steps to prevent access to information.
Or provide HCP with contact details in order for them to send the same letters to you both.

Ive seen a few of your threads she really is very tiresome, to stop it stressing you out you need to find a way of providing yourself with a buffer whilst remaining inside the terms of the actual order

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RubbleBubble00 · 16/07/2016 13:27

You notified her. Ignore and carry on with your life with your son

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livinginabox · 16/07/2016 13:28

I agree, get the HCP to inform her directly so you limit your co tact with her. She sounds bloody awful and neither of you need to ha e that around you.

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abbsismyhero · 16/07/2016 13:29

Next time get the hcp to copy the report to her take yourself out of the equation

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PeppaPigTastesLikeBacon · 16/07/2016 13:32

I would maybe just keep informing her like you do but ignore the replies. They are no doubt very hurtful, but don't let it affect you and your son. You wouldn't be UR to take her back to court but why waste your time on her?

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wizzywig · 16/07/2016 13:34

She sounds like an utter utter heartless bitch.

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monkeysox · 16/07/2016 13:45

Flowersand Cake you're doing well. She's not nice

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Aspergallus · 16/07/2016 13:46

So sorry. It sounds incredibly difficult for you and your son. Hope you have other forms of support.

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Arfarfanarf · 16/07/2016 13:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HooseRice · 16/07/2016 13:50

If you can't get the HCP to copy her, I suggest you copy her by post.

All the best to you and your boy.

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FluffyPanda · 16/07/2016 13:50

Just give her the basics and ignore anything she comes out with.

You're doing a fab job on your own, your son only needs you. Not the waste of space mother.

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Mymouthgetsmeintrouble · 16/07/2016 13:52

Put the information required in writing and block her from contacting you by phone , she recieves the information required and you dont see any (vile) reply

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TestingTestingWonTooFree · 16/07/2016 13:55

I agree with posting information to her so she's less likely to reply. She sounds horrible. You can't change her feelings or behaviour.

Why do you want to go back to court? What do you think that will achieve?

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ThumbWitchesAbroad · 16/07/2016 13:56

Oh that's dreadful. I agree with getting the HCPs to notify her and avoid contact with her yourself at all.

So sorry :(

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Finola1step · 16/07/2016 13:58

I would register a new email that you use just for communication with her. Then email any relevant info as and when. That way you have proof of what you have sent.

Or send info registered post. Again so you have proof that you have sent it if you ever need proof.

But don't engage.

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GabsAlot · 16/07/2016 13:58

go through the third parties just dont have any contact with her tell them and show the court her replies

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NeedsAsockamnesty · 16/07/2016 13:59

It's normal practise for HCP to send seperate letters/reports to both parents these days.


And to the poster upthread who asked about terminating parental rights in the UK and without an actual adoption it's incredibly rare.

I can think of 4 cases off the top of my head nationally and all of them involved pretty extream abuse.

Ending actual PR is far more unusual than just not granting it in the first place.

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Jackie0 · 16/07/2016 14:01

Take her to court and change which things ?

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RedHareWithBlondeHair · 16/07/2016 14:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GenerationX2 · 16/07/2016 14:04

I'm so sorry your post mad me so sad, I agree with wizzywig - she is a heartless bitch.

I wish you could cut her out your life - and honestly if I ruled the world I would approve that based solely on that text

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ThumbWitchesAbroad · 16/07/2016 14:07

I would imagine going back to court would be to remove the need to inform the child's mother of anything to do with her son, and to possibly stop the supervised visits, if she's not bothering to show up, because it's a waste of time for everyone else.

In which case, yes, you might as well - but you'd need to have proof of her failure to attend, and of the nasty things she's said.

RedHare - if that is the OP's real name, then I strongly suggest you report your own post to either be deleted or get it modified to remove the name. It's incredibly rude to out people on MN.

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RedHareWithBlondeHair · 16/07/2016 14:18

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

honkinghaddock · 16/07/2016 14:19

That was an unpleasant comment RedHair.

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Duckyneedsaclean · 16/07/2016 14:21

You're lovely, aren't you, RedHareWithBlondeHair.

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