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AIBU?

To not like any of the clothes that people but for the dc?

49 replies

Babysafari · 15/07/2016 10:23

People are always buying clothes for the dc. It's really kind but I secretly hate most of them.

I'll admit I love buying clothes for my children. But, I'm not buying them anything expensive, branded or designer or anything like that. I always dress them comfortably and suitable for the weather and I'm not bothered if they get dirty so it's nothing like that. I'm actually a bit obsessed with them being comfortable and mostly dress my baby in cotton babygros and dungarees so he's comfy.

I do love choosing clothes but I know they're not dolls it's just one small part of things. Growing up most of my clothes are hand me downs and my parents chose hideous, old fashioned stuff. I remember my mum asking a friend if they had an old winter coat for me so maybe there's something in it.

I just never like the things other people buy, for example the tshirts from some shops always seem to have huge baggy necks that just look odd shaped or are made of sweaty or itchy material. Or fluffy suits, shoes and jeans for the baby, he doesn't need shoes and a furry suit when it's hot! People also always seem to buy things too small even though both dc are tall for their age.

I don't know whether I'm just really fussy.

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Babysafari · 15/07/2016 10:24

Buy for the dc, that error is going to annoy me now.

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2ManySweets · 15/07/2016 10:25

Just take the stuff to the shop in question, explain the situation and get a credit note?

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callherwillow · 15/07/2016 10:25

I'd feel the same. It's just personal taste. I don't like Winnie the Pooh laden stuff or clothes with garish colours!

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AlbusPercival · 15/07/2016 10:28

callherwillow - maybe we sould set up an exchange programme Grin

I love bright colours (and Disney) but people seem to buy us beiges, grey and pastel blues

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Babysafari · 15/07/2016 10:28

2manysweets it's not a problem in that way, I just feel that I should at least dress them in the stuff or I'm being ungrateful.

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ErrolTheDragon · 15/07/2016 10:29

YANBU - but not sure if you can do much about it except say thankyou and then donate to charity unworn. If the giver wonders why they've not seen your DC wearing the clothes, an explanation that they've already outgrown them, or that the weather isn't right for them etc might give the.m a clue.

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Pimmmms · 15/07/2016 10:29

It sounds like you are very sensitive to the feel of textiles. My DSs prefer comfortable tracksuits, they find trousers far more restrictive and uncomfortable, particularly around the waist. So unless we are specifically dressing up for an occasion, I let them.

One of my DNephews for YEARS would rub every item of clothing between his finger and thumb before deciding whether he'd wear it or not. He absolutely refused to wear jeans, couldn't handle the rough texture of them on his skin.

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Babysafari · 15/07/2016 10:30

Callher I don't like Winnie the Pooh all over everything either!

I suppose I'm wondering if this is a common problem or if I'm incredibly fussy.

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PurpleCrazyHorse · 15/07/2016 10:33

I swap about 90% of stuff my PIL and my mum buy. They love the giving of gifts but don't really think about the purchasing (so wrong seasons in the case of PIL).

They get the joy out of giving us the gift.

I get the joy swapping it for stuff we will use! I like to buy plain basics that go with everything, don't like mottos or character clothing. I definitely only photo our children in clothes they but but we do like.

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Vixxfacee · 15/07/2016 10:36

I don't want anyone to buy any baby clothes for me. I hate pictures on clothes or characters. I don't like certain colours either. I know I am going to be fussy.

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Babysafari · 15/07/2016 10:37

I've definitely got a bit of a thing about comfort. My older dc does wear jeans and all that though.

I find people often don't think about the season when they're buying.

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OlennasWimple · 15/07/2016 10:42

Maybe they've bought in the sales without doing the mental calculation of how big DC will be when they next need a winter coat, say

For things that are the wrong size, I don't think it's rude to ask for the receipt to exchange for the correct size

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PixieMiss · 15/07/2016 10:42

I have a baby DS and practically all the clothes bought for him have a car on Hmm

Glad to see it isn't just me who is 'particular'!

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DowntonDiva · 15/07/2016 10:42

YANBU I feel exactly the same, and incredibly guilty. But it's getting silly I have bags of unworn clothing. I've decided to start exchanging or getting credit notes and donate DDs unwanted clothing.

DD has eczema and any fabric not cotton she can't wear but mostly I just don't want her dressed like a little doll.

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kiki22 · 15/07/2016 10:48

I return loads of stuff DS gets because I don't like it, I am fussy with his clothes I like him dressed in a certain way he may not be a doll but he's my child and I'll dress him how I like. Luckily he's took his style from me and likes what I choose for him 🙌

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Babysafari · 15/07/2016 10:49

I do feel guilty (when they fit) because I know they're bought with love but some of them are just horrible (imo of course).

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smellsofelderberries · 15/07/2016 10:50

I am already dreading people buying clothes for our first, and I feel such a cow for it! I also hate any sort of character clothing and garishly pink/purple/sparkly things. In-laws have very different taste to us and I'm hoping they don't worry about buying much Blush and I'm also really hoping we don't get any hand-me-downs from my SIL. However, I am very much hoping we get hand-me-downs from my cousin as her little one is so well dressed!

So, no, YANBU, and if you are, then so am I!

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Babysafari · 15/07/2016 10:54

Smells if I had a girl it would be worse because I don't particularly like pink, frills and sparkly stuff. But I do like some dark pinks, I know everyone we'd get loads of pale pink fluff!

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Scaredycat3000 · 15/07/2016 10:58

I got some mad clothes gifts for DS1. And the most impractical crap came from women who had both DC and GC, not childless people who at least probably lacked experience. Impractical crap = 0-6 months hard plastic rain coat, because I leave my NB lying in the rain Confused, hoods on NB everything, developing backs need a lump in them, complicated outfits. My DC just weren't pooing, sicky machines I didn't need 40 multi pack baby grows.
I asked relatives whilst pregnant to avoid buying pale colours, I don't like them and dc ended up with my colouring so pale colours make them look ill. MIL saw this as a challenge I think. The dc's rarely wear anything from her, when buying any present it's about her tastes not the recipients, me and now the DCs. If you're lucky and you get something nice something will be wrong like the shorts finally fit in the middle of winter, or none of the outfit fits at the same time.

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Babysafari · 15/07/2016 11:04

Scardey I just laughed at the hard plastic rain coat for a newborn.

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BadgersBum · 15/07/2016 11:07

Ah just do as I did; Dress them in said outfit, take photo, send photo by text or post on Facebook with suitably gushy 'look at the gorgeous outfit xxxx has bought' message. Then change child into something more to your taste and shove present to back of wardrobe never to be seen again (or give to charity shop if you're a lot more organised than I am, I swear all the children in Narnia must be running around in my DSs cast-offs!)

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MamTDM · 15/07/2016 11:11

My DS is nearly 10 now, but he's always been very tall for his age _ the tallest in his class by far - and needed a size up. MIL buys him actually quite nice things, but they're always at least one size too small - I'm currently buying him age 10-11, but she'll get him age 8-9 'because he's 9' (not even 9-10 - and this is someone with four kids and eight grandkids!) She always takes the tags off before she gives them to us so I can't even exchange them. She has done this consistently for ten years despite seeing him trying to squeeze into things that are clearly tiny for him and saying every time, 'Oh, I must remember to get a size up next time...'

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Hastalapasta · 15/07/2016 11:17

Not ungrateful, I have been known to donate stuff with labels to our local hospice shop, donate brand new baby clothes in new born size (my kids were all huge) to the local maternity ward and eBay some particularly offending pink items.... I love the fact that my relations think of my kids and want to buy them stuff, but it always seems out of sync with what the actually need or will wear comfortably....

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Foolscapped · 15/07/2016 11:18

Yanbu at all. We seem to have a lot of relatives who worried about DS's masculinity from birth, so that literally every garment was blue and came festooned with cars, diggers trains and tractors, often with slogans like DADDY'S BOY or HERE COMES TROUBLE etc. Or tiny football shirts, for teams they support, but not DH, I or (obviously) our newborn. MIL kept producing dozens of the most awful tiny crocheted matinee jackets in hideous scratchy blue wool that she kept buying somewhere a shop that was still in the 1950s, although DH repeatedly asked her to stop, as newborn DS kept getting his fingers stuck in the holes and going crazy.

Now that he's four, we've moved into the realm of still more depressing clothes in navy blue and sludge-colour, still covered with diggers, cars, tractors, macho superheroes/cartoon characters and the occasional shark.

I don't want him to feel that he's supposed to live in a monochrome world of Stereotype Guy Things, and I like him in plain, comfortable clothes in bright colours, the kind of thing that could be worn by either sex and doesn't uphold 'pink frilly girls' vs 'navy blue tractor boys' stereotypes.

So a lot of stuff goes back to the shop and is exchanged. We've kind of compromised on pyjamas, so his night clothes are a riot of cartoon characters and nylon...

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Hastalapasta · 15/07/2016 11:19
  • they not the....
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