New neighbors what to do?!(27 Posts)
So we have some new neighbors, been about 2 weeks so far and it's not all great at the moment.
I will be the first to say we were lucky with old neighbors they were pretty quiet (apart from some early morning DIY/caravan weekends) and kept themselves to themselves while still being polite.
New neighbors are becoming a bit of a nightmare tbh! They are quite loud banging around in the house but have put this down to unpacking/decorating etc so ignoring it atm.
They have 2 small dogs that bark constantly through the day! They are out and work ft so obviously don't realise and I am worried it will come across like I'm difficult if I say something about it? They have had a friend/father around in the day recently so the barking has stopped for now but I'm not sure what to do when it starts again?
The main issue is with them smoking! I know I am going to sound v.unreasonable but it is driving me mad! They are smoking in their garden but as our gardens are so small it is coming straight into our windows and we can't sit out without smelling very strong smoke! The house this morning smelt like a 20 a day smoker had been in there!
Don't get me wrong I smoked for 12 years and I know it's their garden and completely their right to smoke there but I can't live with the smell and don't know what to do?
Wibu to say something? What would I say? Do I just have to live with it stinking if I want my windows open or to sit outside?
Sorry drip feed I know, but it is also bloody annoying when their dog barks at fence when we are in garden and you get the accompanying 'don't bark darling' over and over but not actually stop the bloody thing from barking!!
You can't do/say anything about the smoking. It's their garden they are smoking in.
The barking I would mention. Keep a dairy for a week, then go and talk to them. I'm not sure what they can/will do but I agree with you that barking isn't good! ( and I have dogs )
This is going to sound unsympathetic but unless you live in a detached house with land, you're always going to have things about neighbours that frustrate you. The only answer to the noise, smoking and dog situation is to move. They aren't breaking the law & it's their home.
Ironically im reading this thread while smoking in my own garden
But my neighbour has his windows closed and is a smoker himself anyway so it wouldn't bother him, but your right they have a right to smoke in their own garden and as long as it isn't weed theres nothing you can do about it, other than to buy extra air fresheners for your house, the plug in ones would probably be better as you can choose the setting for how strong you want the smell to be emitted
The OP can contact environmental health who can speak to the neighbour about the barking if it continues after she's has brought the issue up.
The smoking would drive me nuts and if ask if they could occasionally smoke at the front of the house instead? Say you have asthma or something.
As they are new, why not invite them round for a bottle of wine one weekend evening? Get to know them, make friends with them, and then any issues are MUCH more easily resolved....... they might be willing to smoke at the other end of the garden for example, if you mention to them about how the smoke gets in your windows. However, if the first time you interact with them is to complain, then you'll probably not get such a good response.
Well my initial response is..
Burn them with fire, how dare they be there and be all new and cause there to be CHANGE... ugh.
But on reconsidering the issue.. and realising my instinctive response is not normal..
The dogs are barking because its a brand new environment iwth new noises and they will be anxious.
Pop a POLITE note round about the barking and suggest that they get a behaviour consultant in to give them solid advice on how to deal with the anxiety and resultant behaviours a house move will cause.
Something really simple they can do is to counter condition teh dogs to sounds outside so instead of pointlessly wittering at the dogs when they bark they pair every sound with a high value reward - eventually sounds become a GOOD thing not a bad thing and the barking stops.(It requires a week or two of consistent work though, you cannot remove anxiety and train new behaviours just lke that no matter how pissed the neighbours are).
Smoking - ask them to smoke out the front instead? Or revert to the 'burn them with fire' option I mentioned earlier.
Yeah it's annoying with the dog but mainly I find it a bit distressing as the dog is obviously unhappy.
I hate the smoke and am more annoyed that I have to never open my windows or sit outside.
I don't really see how it is fair as they would be (rightly) pee'd off if I was lighting a fire outside every night! Maybe I should start up the chimina every evening for a couple of weeks!
Nothing you can do about smoking, they are well within their rights to smoke in their own property/land.
The dogs dog situation, they may be unaware of the dogs barking, so I think you need to discuss that with them.
Ask them to smoke at the front as you have breathing difficulties. I hate it's their garden they can do what they want. What about consideration of others which includes not blowing cancer causing chemicals into others houses
Sympathies George, we had/have similar problems. Months of racket before and after they moved in (decorating til early hours so we go v. little sleep) and plenty of racket since.
Another little treat is the fag or weed smoking in the garden so that we have to be careful having windows and doors open. The house smelt like a cannabis den one evening recently. Not pleasant. At all. I drink alcohol sometimes but I don't force it down anyone else's throat, smokers should stay in their own houses/garages/sheds as it is totally unfair on neighbours esp in the summer.
Anyhow enough of my rant, are they reasonable people you think you could have a quiet word with, do you think they might listen. If the dogs are not barking so much when they are home maybe they don't realise? It might be worth investing in a Dohm white noise machine (Amazon) we found it worth it's weight in gold, just takes a couple of weeks to get used to, it may cover up a lot of the noise. Good luck hope it gets better.
I just feel really awkward going round/inviting them round and sort of complaining. I'm quite a push over irl and would be very uncomfortable!
I did say hello when they moved in and the dh just looked straight at me, mumbled his name and looked at me like I had just taken a dump on the path!
Yes you're all right of course! I need to man up say about dogs (when it starts again) for the dogs as well as myself. (I know the neighbors the other side were annoyed as they came round but I didn't really engage with slagging the new neighbors off as I don't like bitc@@ng behind others backs! And o know he was hoping I would say something for them)
Maybe some nice £50 candles for the house 😀😀 we don't have a cleaner so should be ok!
I'd leave the dogs a few weeks to see if they settle. It's all new for them. If they don't settle, you can pop round and explain you left it for a bit. They should warm to you then.
Nothing to do about the smoking.
They are smoking in ther own garden, nothing you can do about that apart from deal with it.
The dogs barking is different if it is on going say something , maybe the dogs are just playing up a little after moving house when we moved our dog was a little unsettled for a week or so I think he was getting use to new surroundings not that it mattered for us no neighbours for a mile or so each side.
Don't leave a note, speak to them. A note through the door with no attempt to speak to them first will probably just annoy them.
TBH I wouldn't go on about the dogs - like seriously what do you think the solution would be? Muzzles? Rehoming?
And definitely not the smoking, because that is batshit crazy.
I would have given you a but you seem nice enough.
Seriously though, pick your battles.
When you find a battle -
Agree with Purple never leave notes for neighbours,
If you have a REAL issue bribe them with things and ask nicely in a totally side point way.
BengalCatMum the owners can do something to resolve the dogs anxiety at being left. So that is something I would mention.
A relaxed/happy dog can easily spend 20 hours out of 24 asleep!!
Speak to them about the Dogs OP.
With the smoking can you stick a fan in your house in the direction of where the smoke comes in,it should stop your house smelling and it should blow the smoke back in the direction it's coming from,they should notice the smoke blowing back so it might encourage them to smoke a bit further down the garden
I agree with Random of course something can be done for the Dogs,as annoying as it is for they're neighbours it's really not good for the poor Dogs neither.
We have 3 Dogs and we're in an end of terrace house there's no way we'd leave our Dogs barking all day it would be really unfair on our Dog and on our poor neighbours.
The dogs might settle down; it's only been 2 weeks.
You say you smoked for many years yourself? It's a bit hypocritical to ask them not to smoke in their garden when it's something you've previously done yourself. You could ask them to smoke out the front, but be fully prepared for them to say no!
From my name you might tell Im a cat person
Honestly I have no idea what you can do about these things, but I hate it when people go on about things that are out of someones control.
And assumed this was one of those things.
I think you have my old neighbours they moved about 2 weeks ago and I had the exact same problem. There two dogs yapped and cried the whole time they was out and they smoked but not near my windows. Smoking never bothered me as I could only smell it when I was outside but I did bring up to dogs when it was happening from 5am. 5am yapping stopped but not in the day.
I would speak to them when your calm.
I have 3 kids so I think I make a fair bit of noise it made me not worry as much about my noise though.
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