I'm starting to wonder if I'm unreasonable about asking people not to discuss things personal to me. For example, a couple of years ago we had a bit of a stressful year with problems with my dh's health (was diagnosed with early stage bowel cancer) and some trouble ds1 was having at school. I was quite stressed and when I discussed them with my parents, I specifically asked them not to tell my db and sil. I didn't want the dcs to accidentally find out from them about their df from their uncle and I didn't want my opinionated db to chip in about ds as I was feeling upset. Well my dps told my db anyway. I was upset but let it go. Dh thought I was asking too much of them.
Recently my dm has been very ill and we found out last week that she has cancer. We are still waiting to hear of it has spread etc. I am very stressed about this as she has been as heavy smoker most of her life and it has always been my worst fear. I haven't even told my close friends who get on great with my mum because I can't bear to say it aloud. I told my dh not to tell his parents because they are generally very opinionated and nosey and I'm just not ready to talk about it. He told them because they 'have a right to know' . Next day I had them on the phone telling me everything would be fine, they've known people with worse diagnoses who got better etc etc. Perhaps some people would think it was nice of them to call but I specifically said to dh I wasn't ready to talk to anyone and he ignored that? Am I being difficult and unreasonable? I'm starting to think I'm being weird and secretive.
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AIBU?
To expect people to respect my wish for privacy
19 replies
Bestthingever · 12/07/2016 16:56
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