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AIBU To not buy daughter birthday presents.

(21 Posts)
Madsien2591 Sun 10-Jul-16 22:28:30

Hi, my daughters third birthday is a week after Christmas.
She is getting many presents for Xmas but for her birthday we are booking new year in Disney land Paris which will also be for her birthday.
On her birthday we will have lunch with the princesses etc ( costing near 200 pound ) plus the rest of the holiday.
I told my mum I will not be doing presents and she thinks I'm being unreasonable.
I didn't want to drag presents back and forth with us.
Usually I buy a pile of presents and split them between the Xmas and birthday. She will still get the same amount for Christmas and Disney land : princess lunch for her birthday.
My mum thinks she should still get presents on her actual birthday.
What do you think AIBU ?

NanFlanders Sun 10-Jul-16 22:32:36

I'd get something to unwrap - princess dress for lunch with the princesses maybe? Impressive looking and about a tenner from Asda!

Excited101 Sun 10-Jul-16 22:33:06

I think not buying her presents is really mean. She will have no concept of money and how much the holiday has cost. At that age they just want a few little things to unwrap. Can you not afford it op? I would say if it's a money issue then ditch an element of the holiday.

Hulababy Sun 10-Jul-16 22:33:11

I assume the DLP trip IS her gift. Maybe throw in a princess dress or similar - maybe make your mum feel happier but also not really necessary.

DeathStare Sun 10-Jul-16 22:33:43

I agree with your mum. She's too little to understand that she hasn't got any presents because she's gone to Disney land.

It doesn't need to be big presents. Some crayons, sweets, etc would be fine

BluePitchFork Sun 10-Jul-16 22:33:56

you can give presents on another special day instead.
a family we know where birthdays are also close to christmas. they give presents to dc in the summer instead.

Gingernut81 Sun 10-Jul-16 22:35:35

You could always let her buy a souvenir? But to be honest I'm with you, people are always so generous with little ones that I don't think it necessary to buy vast amounts of presents. She'll be having a wonderful birthday anyway do you think she'll be bothered by a lack of presents?

Madsien2591 Sun 10-Jul-16 22:44:00

To be honest I don't really think she even understands presents haha.
The holiday is her gift yes.
We have never had a Xmas or new year out of hospital and it's been a long few years. She loves her princesses so I thought we would take her.
It is taken pretty much my life savings though and going to be tight ha
I said I would obviously let her pick something from the Disney store but apparently this is not the same !

YolandiFuckinVisser Sun 10-Jul-16 22:47:41

Get her some little things to unwrap. At 3 my DD was thrilled to bits with hair bobbles, bubble bath, little packs of sweets, colouring pencils.

My birthday is 2 days before Xmas. It doesn't matter in the slightest now but when I was a child it always rankled when I didn't get a birthday present because it was nearly Xmas or I got one higher value present because it was for Xmas and birthday combined. A child wants the fun of unwrapping a present, the monetary value is irrelevant to her.

KimmySchmidtsSmile Sun 10-Jul-16 22:51:46

All the souvenir tat is shockingly expensive there even minnie mouse ears.
The next station along has acheaper shopping mall (where sealife is).
The only thing that isquitenice are the autograph books but I bet they are cheaper online.
I would ask your family to buy her online if you do not have already:
Minnie mouse ears
Autograph book (for the disney characters)
Cheap dress to take with her or disney type pyjamas to pack
A magnetic drawing board (small) for the journey

4 items, reasonably small and easy to take. Everyone's happy, surely?


KimmySchmidtsSmile Sun 10-Jul-16 22:54:20

LockedOutOfMN Sun 10-Jul-16 22:57:38

Little things to unwrap, as others have said. 2 or 3 presents should be fine and some candles and matches to put in a bun / cupcake etc. to sing happy birthday.

If you're looking to save money (beyond the huge amount you've spent already on the trip), avoid the Disney store; she is too little to realise and you can easily keep her occupied at Disney with the rides, street parades, entertainment, etc.

Have a wonderful holiday!

KimmySchmidtsSmile Sun 10-Jul-16 22:57:39

The books are expensive but the pink one is cheap and nice. The activity unofficial book might be something for your mum to get?

Madsien2591 Sun 10-Jul-16 23:00:41

Ahh good idea so if I pre buy the stuff like photo books , costume , and sweets etc then wrap a Disney treat box for her birthday morning ?
It really isn't to do with the fact her birthday is so close to Xmas it's just it's a huge amount of money with Xmas Aswell of that makes sense.
Every other year she has had presents for both and will do in the future.

Notsure1234 Sun 10-Jul-16 23:17:05

That sounds like a good compromise Mad as its money you'd most likely spend anyway whilst there

whatamockerywemake Mon 11-Jul-16 01:01:06

what's wrong with stickers? Costs you a pound and your DD will love them.

EverySongbirdSays Mon 11-Jul-16 01:08:35

Can ANYBODY on this thread tell me what they did or did not get for their third birthday? No? Thought not.

She won't know, she won't remember two years later anyway, she'll have a great time on the day and that's the bit that she'll keep a residual memory of.

Your Mum is being U - she can obviously still buy her something herself.

You are being U for agonising over it, both in general and this far away from her birthday.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Mon 11-Jul-16 03:21:06

Well yes it would be a bit mean of you tbh.
She won't equate the fact that her holiday is her present. Unless she's an absolute genius.
You don't have to go all out on presents.
Just a few things from the Poundland will suffice at that age

NovemberInDailyFailLand Mon 11-Jul-16 03:53:29

I totally can, Songbird! And it was brilliant smile

In answer to the OP, though, yes, things to unwrap. Cake and balloons.

BengalCatMum Mon 11-Jul-16 04:00:51

My birthday is christmas eve, so I get the whole double pressie thing is an issue for both sides; both because I was that kid, and also because now I am older I realise its crazy to buy two full sets. Now I love joint presents; but thats because they are literally nearly the same day. But back in day, I did like two sets, as its all in surprise.

Its not a big issue now she's 3; she just needs stuff to open, and the contents/ monetary value is not the point. Its the opening of the paper really. Crazy I know.

Later if she gets older then its going to get more complicated; as contents will start to matter. And if she has siblings then lets hope all is equal regardless of where her birthday is.

Week after xmas doesn't sound too extreme though.

My mums in her 60s, heres is 27th Dec, and I feel quilty to combine them so sometimes end up over compensating. Because really by the time 27th comes round, 25th does feel like a long time ago. Hahah too much wine

But sounds like so much fun OP, she is going to love it. Why not nice princess outfit to unwrap on morning? Hair stuff, cutesy handbag ect? Adds to planned idea and can keep and play with at home to remember?

ThumbWitchesAbroad Mon 11-Jul-16 04:31:16

I think that the idea of pre-buying stuff for the holiday so she has something to unwrap is brilliant, and will preclude the need to spend it in the overpriced souvenir shop as well - winning!

Yes, do get her something to unwrap - at that age, that's the bit they love best. smile

Lovely idea for her birthday treat.

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