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AIBU?

to find this kind of attitude quite off-putting?

55 replies

Ellybellyboo · 06/07/2016 11:08

I've recently given up smoking and I'm at that point where, if you stand still too long, I'll eat you.

I'm used to not really having to worry about weight, but I'm now being a bit careful. Not on a diet as such, just watching what I eat and I've started cycling into work

It feels like everyone I work with is a huge fitness fanatic as apparently I'm doing everything wrong.

My bike is wrong (I have an ancient, old fashioned job with about 3 gears and a shopping basket), I'm wearing the wrong clothes (my jeans, a hoodie and a pair of trainers). My lunch yesterday was all wrong (a cheese and pickle sarnie and a toffee Muller light yoghurt).

It takes me about half an hour to cycle to work - this is too slow, I should be able to do it in 10 minutes, I'm not working hard enough, blah, blah, blah

They're so critical and over the top, it's really putting me off.

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MassiveStrumpet · 06/07/2016 11:10

Good Lord! I'd be utterly annoyed, too.

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MassiveStrumpet · 06/07/2016 11:10

Stop sharing with them. Don't tell them what you're doing or why.

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CMOTDibbler · 06/07/2016 11:13

I'm a cyclist, and would have told them to eff off tbh. You're old enough to know the calorie count of stuff and make your choices - I'd feel fuller with the same calories with a ham and pickle sarnie plus a few pieces of fruit, but thats my choice!

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Ellybellyboo · 06/07/2016 11:16

I'm not sharing anything, we're all in an open plan office so they see stuff like what I'm having for lunch.

We have a communal bike rack, they can see me arrive on my bike, etc

They did ask me how long it took, and I answered, I should have kept my gob shut, but the rest of the 'advice' is totally uninvited

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moosemama · 06/07/2016 11:18

YANBU, I blame all this 'fitspiration' nonsense.

Eating less and/or healthier than you were and moving more are always a good idea. Not everyone wants to be superfit and how you eat and exercise is no-one's business but your own.

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blueskyinmarch · 06/07/2016 11:19

First of all well done in stopping smoking. That alone will reap you massive health benefits. Even if you gain a little weight it will be less detrimental to your overall health than the smoking.

It sounds like you are redressing the balance by increasing your exercise and watching your calorie intake. I am successfully losing weight but am not draconian about what i eat. Most days salad is fine for lunch but sometimes i want a cheese and pickle sandwich or something of that ilk. It sounds like you are trying not to gain weight rather than actively losing weight so what you are doing is fine.

Keep it up and ignore the fanatics. You are doing just fine.

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WorraLiberty · 06/07/2016 11:22

If you're not sharing anything, i.e the fact you're watching what you eat, why did they consider it wrong?

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Religieuse · 06/07/2016 11:23

Just close them down. It's an open--plan office, not some kind of 'fitspiration' encounter group!

Can I just say that as someone who also cycles to work, I'm always pleased to see other cyclists on the roads (I live in a village and work in the city) who are using bikes to get somewhere and replace car journeys, rather than hobby cyclists who drive their bikes to their starting point dressed up in the latest Tour de France gear and go-faster helmets?

Ignore them. Tell them there's no bore like a fitness bore. Or tell them to fuck off and then say you're getting dangerous mood swings because of nicotine cravings, so they'd better be careful.

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ijustwannadance · 06/07/2016 11:26

I have a second hand, many geared mountain bike. I use 2 gears and don't ride it up mountains. A bike is a bike. Ignore them OP you are doing fine.

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blitheringbuzzards1234 · 06/07/2016 11:37

Just say, "I'm a commuting cyclist, not in the ruddy Tour de France, so back off". This is the trouble with some people - they turn everything into a competition. It's tiresome and unnecessary. Do things your way and at your own pace.

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Ellybellyboo · 06/07/2016 11:39

Thanks,

I don't want to lose weight - I just want to offset the raging appetite I've acquired. I just don't want to gain weight.

Some of my colleagues are into fitness in a big way, and because I've started cycling in they see me as a new convert.

I keep getting invited to go out running at lunch time and why don't I go to the spinning class they all go to after work

I don't want to be super-fit in any case, but as a newbie to cycling, their constant harping isn't exactly encouraging if you see what I mean. It's like they're enjoying feeling superior

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WhyShouldYou · 06/07/2016 11:39

Just tell them to Fuck Off, with a smile.

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MetalMidget · 06/07/2016 11:44

Riding an old, heavy bike with fewer gears will give you more of a workout than a sleek carbon lightweight bike! :D

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BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 06/07/2016 11:44

Get some cheapie business cards printed up with MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS (in Comic Sans perhaps, although that might be a step too far). Hand them out silently and walk away. Grin

I think that it's a shame that something as simple as cycling has become competitive. I think that attitude puts off a lot of people who would like to cycle for short distances instead of using the car but find other cyclists intimidating. In Amsterdam all sorts of people cycle, they use all sorts of ramshackle bikes, often with home-made additions to carry shopping or a small dog, and they go at whatever damn speed they feel comfortable with.

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MangoMoon · 06/07/2016 11:46

Agree with WhyShouldYou - "fuck off", with a smile!

Alternatively, just tell them that you're not cycling for fitness, far from it - you're doing it for fresh air & because you enjoy it.

I like to go out for a bike ride myself, not fast & lycra'd up - just like you, a meandering enjoyable ride; using a bike as a way to get from A to B quicker than walking but not as A Thing That Requires Special Stuff.

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ijustwannadance · 06/07/2016 11:46

Running at lunch time?! Are they insaneShock
BrewCake

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wasonthelist · 06/07/2016 11:49

Loving the cards idea.

In response to a plethora of unsolicited advice and questioning at a desk job I had near a noisy aircon unit I once produced a leaflet entitled "The noisy aircon unit - your questions answered"

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HopperBusTicket · 06/07/2016 11:49

Well don for giving up smoking. That's an incredible achievement and is the best thing you can do for your health. That's what your colleagues should be telling you! Unless you've asked for their feedback on your bike, your lunch, or your cycling speed I can't imagine why they think you want to hear it!

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AddictedtoSnickers · 06/07/2016 11:50

You sound exactly like me, same bike, same clothes and same lunch! You are doing fine - smile, nod and thank them for their advice and go about your business as you are. It's annoying but you aren't trying for a 6 pack, just sensible eating and moderate exercise. I've never been a smoker but hopefully the extra hunger you feel will subside eventually as your body adjusts. It took me at least a month after stopping breastfeeding each of my three to stop wanting to demolish an entire pack of hob nobs before 11am. Good luck!

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wasonthelist · 06/07/2016 11:50

YANBU btw

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noramum · 06/07/2016 11:59

I come from Germany, the hobby-cyclist you see here dressed in spandex will cause laughing attacks back at home. At home lots of people commuted by bike, dressed in normal clothes.

I recently upgraded to a new bike, heck, I still can't figure the gears out but it makes a difference in speed. But I still wear jeans. A good visible jacket is somthing you should think of as motorist will see you faster.

Good for you to stop smoking and exercise. Forget your colleagues.

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HappySeven · 06/07/2016 12:02

This sort of thing really irritates me (and I'm a keen cyclist and runner). I know people are trying to be helpful but if anything they end up being off-putting.

You are doing a brilliant job, I take my hat off to anyone who doesn't normally exercise taking something up and just doing it. They are right in that a 'better' bike and the 'right' gear would make it easier and you'd probably enjoy it more (and so perhaps be more likely to stick with it) but really they should just say well done.

I'll say it for them, well done!

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HoneyDragon · 06/07/2016 12:10

I've started back at the gym to lose some weight gained as a result of injury and strengthen my back .... I'm getting no end of random advice on calorie counting and diet from people who say I won't lose weight excercising Grin

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acasualobserver · 06/07/2016 12:17

As the poster from Germany above confirms, countries where utility cycling is the norm do not obsess about cycling equipment and clothing. People ride to work on very ordinary bikes wearing their everyday clothes.

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acasualobserver · 06/07/2016 12:19

I meant to add:

"All the gear ... no idea."

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