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To Stop DH

(14 Posts)
facepalming Sat 02-Jul-16 18:30:28

Driving the kids?

My DH is a horrible driver. He drives too quick, too aggressive and he is really unobserved. Lately we have had a few near misses thanks to the good judgement of other Drivers. Though DH has never had an accident.

I felt like I was always moaning at him. Today he missed a car to his right at a roundabout - luckily she stopped but he didn't even notice that she was waiting on thr roundabout to turn.

It was the final straw for me and I said from now I drive when the kids are in the car and I dont want him driving them full stop.

AIBU? I've asked him to take more care driving so many times. He knows how he drives - wouldn't even consider insurance that needed a black box monitor.

TheDowagerCuntess Sat 02-Jul-16 18:33:12

Yes, no question.

But, wow, what an enormous amount of time and pressure that's going to put on you, as a result.

He sounds like quite an arse.

mrsfuzzy Sat 02-Jul-16 18:36:11

def nbu, he's a danger to everyone on the road let alone his passengers, he's never had an accident but it will only be a matter of time before he has one and there could be fatalities, has he always been like this? no way would i let him drive our kids if i was you.

MissingPanda Sat 02-Jul-16 18:40:20

He sounds like one of those drivers who only haven't had an accident because of other driver's skills in avoiding potential accidents.


Blossom567 Sat 02-Jul-16 18:46:37

What about an advanced driving course as a birthday present?! I've been considering it for OH as an attempt to rid some of his bad driving habits. Also fed up of nagging - I'm just labelled a bad passenger! Grrr.

DavidPuddy Sat 02-Jul-16 19:03:06

Does he need his eyesight checked? My husband said he found driving easier once he strted wearing glasses.

missybct Sat 02-Jul-16 19:12:29

Definitely not being unreasonable. This would put the fear into me as a passenger, never mind allowing children in the car.

Has he always been like this OP? Or has it got worse - could it be eyesight related or has he been taking medication that could lessen his ability to read situations quickly?

DP can be really distracted when driving - if he dropped something or knocked something, he'd rummage around for it (he sometimes is prone to fiddling with stereo too) - the route he drives to work is so ingrained in him that he forgets that he needs to pay attention confused

Mrsw28 Sat 02-Jul-16 19:13:56

Not unreasonable at all. My DH suffers from road rage and doesn't think speeding is breaking the law hmm he reckons speed limits are "guidelines" face palm. Generally he only drives the kids when I'm in the front passenger seat and I can remind him that the speed limit is only such and such and can tell him to let it go if someone cuts us up/ignores roundabout rules/indicates incorrectly etc. If I know he's tired I just drive myself and save the agro.

facepalming Sat 02-Jul-16 19:19:41

Thank you.

Yes I also get the annoying passenger label!

He is the kind of driver I hate when driving myself , and when walking for that matter! way too fast past parked cars and residential streets.

I swear he is perfectly lovely in every other way but he just won't accept this is such a huge error of judgement on his side. He knows he drives too quick and that he is not always as observant as he should be but has somehow convinced himself that he had superior driving skills and reactions and so it's OK.

His ex used to moan at him about his driving apparantly, and our friends have made comments in the past - you would think at some point he would look at himself.

I'm just not prepared to risk the kids. I'm not a perfect driver but I don't speed and I'm super careful (friends tease me about my grandma driving!). DS2 is only 6 months and I'm scared for his little neck with the hard braking sad

I'm trying not to turn it into a full scale row again - in fact I've said it's the opposite this will prevent the rows but he is still really pissed with me.

facepalming Sat 02-Jul-16 19:21:04

love the advanced driving course suggestion!!

Ellioru Sat 02-Jul-16 19:23:48

YANBU. My step dad is the exact same, everytime I'm in the car with him I feel like I'm on some kind of rollercoaster which will end in sudden death. I wish I was exaggerating! He totalled his car a few weeks ago with my little brother in the car (3) and of course it was everyone's fault but his grin

Gbean Sat 02-Jul-16 19:25:24

He sounds like a dick. Who isn't extra careful when driving their children around? Id be having a serious conversation

NapQueen Sat 02-Jul-16 19:25:59

If your DS is rear facing his neck should be quite well protected - not that that excuses your dh's dick head driving.

I'd refuse to get in the car with him. I'd also do my darndest to stop the kids getting into the car with him.

Sadly he is a parent too so I'm not sure if there is any real way to stop him.

lalalalyra Sat 02-Jul-16 19:26:01

Have you ever filmed a journey in the car with your phone?

A lovely (in every way other than driving) friend of mine got very irate and upset about people declining lifts from her and couldn't understand it. We tried to explain it to her, but she just couldn't see it so we filmed a journey. She was absolutely horrified when she watched it back and is a much, much better driver.

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