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Protecting elderly parents

(3 Posts)
Whichdoor Wed 29-Jun-16 22:00:28

I've name changed for this but am a regular poster.

My brother is eleven years older than me and very abusive in every sense. My parents are approaching the idea of being "elderly". One still works but minimal hours and is always tired and the other doesn't work but has had four strokes.

There's a lot going on for everyone in our family but the crux of my dilemma is that my parents have both told me that they never ever want to "go into a home". If I can therefore, I will, when the time comes, get someone to come in. My dad lives with me already and my mum is welcome here too (they're divorced but best friends).

My brother is very scary and I don't want him near my parents when they are vulnerable. Would there be any way I can enforce this? He has no police record apart from a warning. My parents would never ever press charges or get him into trouble. I remember at age 10 seeing him batter my mum. It was one of the worst things I have ever witnessed. I don't want him near my elderly parents. Is there anything I can sign? Also if both are in my home, he can't access them, can he?

Such a shit evening after him being abusive to both parents verbally when all they did is try to help him. I defended them and obviously got a load of abuse too. They don't need this crap. sad

ElBandito Wed 29-Jun-16 22:08:51

Power of attorney. I believe there are 2, one for finances and one for health. Your parents can stipulate on the finance one thing like "I don't want my home sold unless in the doctor's opinion I am unable to stay in my own home. They can stipulate that only you and each other can look after their affairs.
A solicitor can sort the forms for you, but it us possible, with care to sort it out yourself.

JohnBarrowmaniac Wed 29-Jun-16 22:11:11

I have no advice to offer, but just want to say how lucky they are to have you in their lives and i hope you find a solution.


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