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To think this is none of my business and it is a problem I cannot fix?

(42 Posts)
Eveee Tue 28-Jun-16 18:07:51

I have two lovely, lovely friends. Let's call them Asha and Anna. Now, both women are sweet and kind with the loveliest personalities. However, Asha and Anna have been best friends since infant school and have always been fiercely competitive. They were friends for one of their high school years before breaking apart completely to make other friends and reuniting in their last year of high school. They went to different colleges which made things easier in their friendship before returning to the same uni where they met me. I became a sort of obstacle against their competitiveness and we all have a good friendship. Asha has four kids and is expecting her fifth. Anna has two girls and is expecting her third child. Asha and Anna have both become ridiculously infatuated with the name Elena for this pregnancy. This driven a huge rift between them and is causing them to fight and argue constantly! Asha claims that her children's names fit better whilst Anna says that Asha has had her chances to use Elena. Asha's kids are called Maya Claire, Leela Rose, Indira Jane and Kiran Xavier. Anna's little girls are called Hope Finley and Estelle Kiernan. There was annoyance about Estelle's middle name being Kiernan as Asha has Kiran but not as much as this battle over Elena! They have both turned to me and have asked me to choose who will use the name! Would it be wrong of me to tell them to sod off and go home in peace? blush I have a son called Levi Haley Prince.
Who would you give the name to and do you think IABU to not want to choose?
*Names have been changed

sooperdooper Tue 28-Jun-16 18:09:58


ConcreteUnderpants Tue 28-Jun-16 18:10:13

Acting like a pair of 6 year olds arguing about a toy.
for your own sanity Keep out of it.

BalloonSlayer Tue 28-Jun-16 18:11:49

Named have been changed eh?

May I enquire why the hell you went to the trouble of making up EIGHTEEN (Yes I counted) names all to prove/disprove whether they go with the name in question, when it is a made up name and they are also made up names?

Bloody blimey.

Floggingmolly Tue 28-Jun-16 18:13:28

None of you are old enough to have kids

NeedACleverNN Tue 28-Jun-16 18:15:36

Just tell them you aren't getting involved and if they can't come to a compromise neither one gets to use the name. And then stay quiet or walk off every time it gets discussed

WorraLiberty Tue 28-Jun-16 18:16:47

Why can't we go back to calling everyone Bob and Jane?

Pettywoman Tue 28-Jun-16 18:18:00

Not your problem. Do not get involved.

MrsKoala Tue 28-Jun-16 18:23:57

Go all Solomon on their ass and say one can have El and one can have Ena. The one who truly loves the name will give it up and then you will know the righteous one who deserves the bestowing of the name. You can play some heavenly music while you pronounce your proclamation. Maybe wear a crown...some gold shoes...and a sceptre to poke them with...

WibbleWobbleJellyHead Tue 28-Jun-16 18:27:18

Have you really changed all the names? What on earth was the point of posting a laundry list of made up names that add nothing to the unreasonableness or otherwise of the people involved?

brambly Tue 28-Jun-16 18:31:39

Definitely not your problem, although I accept it can be pretty difficult to wriggle free from the role of piggy in the middle once you've been cast in it.

I don't get the big deal about two Elenas. I have a name that reached peak popularity right around the time I was born and never once attended a school where there weren't at least 3 or 4 others (and sometimes 9 or 10) in a year. None of us ever suffered from it in the least. Some of the biggest mavericks and most memorable people I've ever known have been Sarahs and Nicks and Charlies and Janes.

Why is it that the moment a name becomes even slightly less common than bog standard, people who like it think that they own it? These babies will be thinking, feeling, emoting people, not dolls.

Coconutty Tue 28-Jun-16 18:41:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

brambly Tue 28-Jun-16 18:42:06

Oh, and I have just left a job after 4 years service, and there were at one point two Elenas on the "main floor", and one down in accounts. And it's got more common (I think) in the 25-35 years since these ones were presumably named, so it's not as though it's some incredibly unusual "Bear Grylls offspring marker" style name.

insan1tyscartching Tue 28-Jun-16 18:51:10

Surely it will be first come first served won't it? So whoever has baby first gets the name.

TattyCat Tue 28-Jun-16 18:51:58

I know a Bob and Jane grin

trafalgargal Tue 28-Jun-16 18:52:36

They sound utterly pathetic

Tell them you will not choose between them and they are rubbish friends to ask you to. They both clearly value winning this battle above your friendship.

PortiaCastis Tue 28-Jun-16 18:54:04

This will not get you an A*

emotionsecho Tue 28-Jun-16 18:56:11

I suggest you choose whoever is prepared to spell the name properly.

P1nkP0ppy Tue 28-Jun-16 18:56:54

Have schools broken up already?

Gazelda Tue 28-Jun-16 18:59:37

How come you get to choose? Don't either of them have a DP/H who has a view?

And I don't get why you've made up all those names for us to decide whether Elena matches with the siblings or not? And, all due respect, what relevance is yours DS's name?

Have you swallowed a baby name book?

But in answer to your question, I would tell them both to stop being silly and if they can't agree then you will name your new puppy Elena to stop the bickering.

BeckywiththeGoodHare Tue 28-Jun-16 18:59:47

I like the way you've thrown in your son's (changed?) name. Is it significant? Or is it like one of those complex GCSE Maths questions where we know all of Katie, Bo, Syed and Norman's apple requirements, and then are told about Enid's tomato surplus. Just to make you wonder if you've missed the point, four hours later.

BeckywiththeGoodHare Tue 28-Jun-16 19:01:08

Or hoot with laughter every time the subject comes up and shriek, 'And her second name to be HANDCART, I expect, hahaha!'

acasualobserver Tue 28-Jun-16 19:04:17

I think Anna and Asha should slog it out in the boxing ring. Last woman standing wins the name.

Kitsa Tue 28-Jun-16 19:10:23

Thread is a piss take surely.

EttaJ Tue 28-Jun-16 19:13:47

Ugh it's not even amusing.

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