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To end it and move on

(8 Posts)
Belle89 Sun 26-Jun-16 22:18:57

Would you leave a partner due to you possibly wanting more children one day? Has been playing on my mind as he has a genetic disorder that could be passed on a cause a child to have issues/health issues as they grow, we both have a child each from previous relationships. He would like another and i didnt think i did until this. I dont think its a chance i want to take but feel like a selfish cow to feel this way.

CreepingDogFart Sun 26-Jun-16 22:21:41

I can't really answer by didn't want to read and run. I can however speak from the other side and I am unable to have children. I have sabotaged every relationship because I don't want someone to end up stuck with me and not have the children they want. I don't know what the ethical answer is but I think you need to do what feels right to you. You need to be true to yourself otherwise everything is founded on lies anyway. Do what works for you. flowers

puglife15 Sun 26-Jun-16 22:24:21

I'd think you can't be that into the relationship if you'd leave over this.

Obviously It is wise to weigh up probability and severity of issues a baby could have if you are thinking about TTC.

puglife15 Sun 26-Jun-16 22:25:41

Just to add would you leave a partner if you found out they had fertility issues? Because it's very similar.

ImperialBlether Sun 26-Jun-16 22:26:22

I wouldn't knowingly have a child that might have a health problem - I couldn't do that to a child.

SquinkiesRule Sun 26-Jun-16 22:27:46

You need to look at all the possibilities first, will they child have a high chance of illness? Is he determined that the child be his genetically or would donor sperm be acceptable to you both. Or adoption even.

Anicechocolatecake Sun 26-Jun-16 22:49:09

I think you have to consider it very carefully and it would be far more fair to leave now than later. I have a genetic condition. I'm glad I'm here. I have struggled hugely at times but the good vastly outweighs the bad. At the of the day life is a privilege and something to treasure. I can't have children but I would if I could. I have many cousins and siblings without my condition so your children aren't doomed. My healthy siblings' children might end up with cancer or a million other things for all I know.

That said there are lots of other conditions I simply wouldn't risk passing on. So it depens on what condition you're talking about.

minatiae Sun 26-Jun-16 23:48:47

can't you adopt?

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