This isn't an easy topic, and it's been clear over the last few years that I hold very different opinions to a few members of my family when it comes to issues like this. So please try to see this as a wider problem rather than a one off as that's what I'm struggling with.
I have a younger DB who last night sent me a text from my DFs phone using an awful racial slur, it was in relation to an earlier text I'd sent him about meeting a celebrity at work. When I received the text I initially thought it was from DF and called him- all these reasons running through my head, was it autocorrect(!), was it a typo, or was my DF actually using such an awful word?
My DB answered the phone laughing, and I immediately realised it was him and hung up. My DF called me back without knowing what had happened and couldn't understand why I was so upset, he was laughing and assuming my brother was just being cheeky about something. I said he needed to read his phone and I would speak to him tomorrow, I was mortified and embarrassed.
This morning I receive a text from DB saying:
"I am sorry about yesterday, it wasn't meant to aggravate you it was just meant to be a joke and I understand that you don't always understand my jokes so I will think about it more next time before joking around."
AIBU to not just let it drop? I haven't replied but this is the last straw, he's always been borderline offensive and everyone always made out he was just doing it to be a wind up, but I can't allow my own family to act like this and pretend it's okay. I am so ashamed of him and he just doesn't understand what the problem is.
I have spent so much of my time working with asylum seekers, with victims of trafficking, and have seen first hand what happens when prejudice is allowed to run unchecked. I feel like that if I let this slide I'm contributing to the problem when I'm in the position to be able to help. Just because I'm fortunate enough to be born in a good area, to an educated affluent family does not mean I don't understand the damage this kind of behaviour causes.
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AIBU?
To feel disgusted at my DB?
56 replies
CowPatRoberts · 25/06/2016 14:35
OP posts:
Becky546 ·
25/06/2016 15:05
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