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To be annoyed by this conversation?

(38 Posts)
VoteyMcVoteFace Thu 23-Jun-16 20:55:26

Talked to DH on the phone this lunchtime, I said I was going to vote after doing x, y and z. He said, oh so we're not going together then? I said no, unless we take the kids with us we'll just have to fit it in separately. OK, he says, I'll just stop on my way home tonight then. All fine.

So he gets home and the conversation goes as follows:

Him "Have you voted yet?"
Me "Yes . . . we had that conversation earlier"
Him "What time does the polling station close?"
Me "Usually 9pm I think"
Him "Oh OK, plenty time, so I'll just head down to the church hall then?"
Me: "No . . . you need to go to the Town Hall"
HIm: "Oh. Where's the Town Hall?"
Me: "On Avenue Road"
Him: 'Where's Avenue Road?"
Me (cross) "Are you seriously telling me you don't know where the Town Hall or Avenue Road is? You drive past it twice a day"

AIBU to be a bit cross that he can't a. listen to and recall a conversation from only 4 hours earlier and b. have enough within him to just know these things, or find out for himself, instead of just relying on me to give the answers? It's like it's not important enough for him to know, he'll just ask me because it's easier. He thinks I'm completely unreasonable to even be slightly cross, he asked me because he doesn't know and it's easier to ask me and so what am I getting pissy about? Grrrr.

therootoftheroot Thu 23-Jun-16 20:58:17

i think he's your husband
if you can't ask your wife where the town hall is it's a pretty sad state of affairs quite frankly
this is such a non issue that i feel you are being unreasonable by getting upset by it

one of the reasons i got married was so that i always had someone to ask where my keys where
it's the same kind of thing

ApocalypseSlough Thu 23-Jun-16 20:58:23

Meh- I'd say mildly irritating, no more. What else is going on?

FeckinCrutches Thu 23-Jun-16 21:00:18

Well if he doesn't know, and you were chatting, why wouldn't he ask confused

ThroughThickAndThin01 Thu 23-Jun-16 21:00:50

We have lots of conversations like that. I think we/he are so busy a lot of stuff doesnt get absorbed.

PirateFairy45 Thu 23-Jun-16 21:02:00

But irritating when they can't recall the simplest things. Yeah but don't let yourself get annoyed by it

Sassypants82 Thu 23-Jun-16 21:02:34

Oooh I hate this too. My DH doesn't bother to retain any information, just asks me multiple times. Very annoying.

VoteyMcVoteFace Thu 23-Jun-16 21:03:20

I don't think I would be annoyed if the only thing he didn't know is where the town hall was. He didn't know where he needed to go, by what time (despite having had a polling card, same as me, somehow I managed to figure it out by, y'know, reading it) THEN didn't know where the town hall is. It's a bloody big building with TOWN HALL on a sign outside which he drives past every day.

Heratnumber7 Thu 23-Jun-16 21:03:37

We always vote as a family, even when DDs were to young to vote. Lots of families have the same tradition.
Take the kids with you and go together next time.

Babysafari Thu 23-Jun-16 21:05:36

My dh is like that and it drives me mad. Mine didn't know where the polling station was either despite us having had the conversation several times.

He asks me everything.

VoteyMcVoteFace Thu 23-Jun-16 21:05:43

Heratnumber7 our youngest is a baby and it's pissing with rain here.

VoteyMcVoteFace Thu 23-Jun-16 21:06:42

BabySafari I am not alone in my pain then :-) I know it's not a huge deal it is just BLOODY ANNOYING!!

Tatteredlace Thu 23-Jun-16 21:07:10

Agree with rootoftheroot he's your Husband, he is definately supposed to piss you off with dumb questions. Breath it out and just let it go over your head

PunkrockerGirl Thu 23-Jun-16 21:07:46

And it's 10pm.

MerchantofVenice Thu 23-Jun-16 21:08:54

I agree, OP. My husband and I have lived in our city for precisely the same number of years, but he has no idea where anything is or what any road is called. He simply doesn't pay attention - stuff like that is too boring for him!

However, when we met, he'd been living in that (different) area for longer than me. Miraculously, because he didn't have a wife to ask, he knew some of the boring stuff - road names, opening times etc.

Many men (not all obviously) just switch off and let their wives deal with the tedious minutiae of life. I just mercilessly mock mine. Still love him though...

VoteyMcVoteFace Thu 23-Jun-16 21:09:45

PunkrockerGirl yes I know that now, as after my little outburst he went off and found his card and came back all triumphant and smug telling me I was wrong, it was 10pm.

Lazyafternoon Thu 23-Jun-16 21:13:10


We have conversations like that all the time! It could be either one of us.

Sometimes it's just small talk - so do kind of know anyway, but just vocalising thinking through the details. But also we talk about anything without judgement (I hope!) so if we are being a bit dim then hope that not going to be slated for it! After a busy day and head full of whatever has been going on all day then I can't remember which one is Avenue Road or Upper Street. Or which one is the scout hut and which one is church hall. It's not about not listening to DH, it's just being preoccupied and not worrying about the finer details of something happening later until I need to.

Don't take it personally.

Salmotrutta Thu 23-Jun-16 21:13:26

I never know where anything is and can't recall conversations either - it's not just a male thing.

laidbackneko Thu 23-Jun-16 21:13:53

voty I feel your pain. LTB grin

Salmotrutta Thu 23-Jun-16 21:14:06

When I say "anything" I actually mean "venues".

AmysTiara Thu 23-Jun-16 21:25:12

I like your user name OP grin

AugustaFinkNottle Thu 23-Jun-16 21:26:43

I'd be tempted to tell him if he can't work out where to go to vote he can't be trusted to vote at all. I suspect he'd suddenly be able to find out all by himself.

NicInBetween Thu 23-Jun-16 21:27:52

I am just like your husband.
I really annoy my husband with conversations just like this.
I cannot retain stuff unless it hits in the face.
But I wish i had the time to feel the need to write a post like yours OP!

VoteyMcVoteFace Thu 23-Jun-16 21:30:15

AmysTiara Thank you <twirls>

Liiinoo Thu 23-Jun-16 21:33:05

My DH is the same and it drives me mad; but according to him it's me who,doesn't listen/has a selective memory. As Simon and Garfunkel famously sang ' a man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest'.

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