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to start a thread of all the nasty shit that's been said to me as the parent of a child with SN

(582 Posts)
Maryz Sun 19-Jun-16 12:01:54

starting with:

it's all the fault of the parents.
when I was young there was no such thing as Asperger's/ADHD/whatever
there's nothing wrong with him apart from his attitude
a diagnosis is just an excuse for poor behaviour/parenting
I know a family who have paid for a diagnosis for every one of their children
I don't mind autistic children, but it's not fair that one child should get all the teacher's attention

I thought we could preempt all the shitty threads, and just post to ourselves instead grin

Samcro Sun 19-Jun-16 12:04:07

i don't get a lot of bad stuff as dd is in the sn education system.
but the doctor who couldn't see why disabled kids needed to go on a trip!
the sn dentist who actually said to d "people like you " and patted her on the head.
(dd is an adult!!)

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe Sun 19-Jun-16 12:08:03

I've had social services called on me by my mother with one of the allegations being that I feed my 8yo sugar constantly and 'train' her to have adhd.

I often get told I should smack her when she has a meltdown.

I get told it's a discipline issue.

People who have no idea what it's like on day to day basis tell me what I should do.

My abusive exh and mother (both nc) find out little bits of information and use it to say what a terrible parent I am all the time.

I have a forever living rep next door who can 'cure' her (and could have stopped two of my dc dying but that's a different story).

Some people are twats.

Andbabymakesthree Sun 19-Jun-16 12:09:52

Adhd is a lack of love attention good diet or exercise.

Cod liver oil will solve it.

Really he looks normal

Niklepic Sun 19-Jun-16 12:11:56

The doctor at a specialist conference who said that the children with the life limiting muscle wasting condition the conference was about would be able to walk if they would just put their minds to it.

Maryz Sun 19-Jun-16 12:13:54

Autism is caused by neglectful mother, according to some ancient medical research somewhere (not fathers, obvs).

I've been told that I'm simultaneously too strict (and have driven him to having AS) and too lax (and allowed him to go off the rails).

I get a lot of "why don't you just tell him not to ..."

It's disgraceful that he gets disability allowance as well (surprising how many people think we get a fortune for having a child with extra needs).

treaclesoda Sun 19-Jun-16 12:15:44

A friend who has a child with special needs, who attends a special needs school, told me that a 'friend' of hers asked if she was OK being seen in public with her daughter whilst her daughter was in school uniform because 'then everyone will know'. hmm

MrsDeVere Sun 19-Jun-16 12:16:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Samcro Sun 19-Jun-16 12:16:24

online
i have been told I chose to have a disabled child.
that I am selfish because I accept my childs disability and love the person it has made her.

BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts Sun 19-Jun-16 12:16:55

'Just a drama queen', 'having a tantrum and throwing stuff around' (self)
'Likes to find extra diagnoses on the internet' (self) and 'determined to find something to be wrong with them' (dc)
'Since getting that chair, you dont walk anywhere, youre getting lazy' (self)
'Pandering to', 'needs a smack', 'dont behave like that for me' alongside contradictory 'there is something mentally wrong with them' (dc)
'Get more money for it', 'Free car'

Maryz Sun 19-Jun-16 12:17:15

shock Nik.

My aunt said something similar ("I don't believe in wheelchairs, I'm sure if they tried hard enough they could walk") but then she's a twat, not a doctor.

JacobFryesTopHatLackey Sun 19-Jun-16 12:17:26

"y'know, we could hold a prayer circle for Ds1. In 6 weeks, we could work wonders on his talking".

Said to DP by a professor of languages he was interviewing for his MA dissertation.

user1466334972 Sun 19-Jun-16 12:18:44

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

AlbertHerbertHawkins Sun 19-Jun-16 12:18:50

DS's teacher 'he's just immature, he needs to grown up' - he was 8.

MrsDeVere Sun 19-Jun-16 12:19:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe Sun 19-Jun-16 12:20:33

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DixieNormas Sun 19-Jun-16 12:21:10

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Maryz Sun 19-Jun-16 12:21:51

A teacher about ds2 (ADHD)

He should just sit still, it's not that hard.

A teacher about my friend's child (dyslexia)

Just because he has dyslexia doesn't mean he shouldn't learn his spellings like the other children (she was asking that he be set 20 instead of 40 spellings for the weekly test).

HerRoyalFattyness Sun 19-Jun-16 12:22:12

Have reported user.

Emochild Sun 19-Jun-16 12:22:21

Well she wouldn't behave like that if she was mine! no because then she would have different genetics so you're probably right
Just get her told
You need to stand up to her
You're too strict with her
She seems fine to me
She behaves when I look after her
You shouldn't have gone back to work when she was so young
You put too much pressure on her
You don't put enough pressure on her
She's a child, she doesn't get a choice

Think that's about it

user1466334972 Sun 19-Jun-16 12:22:22

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BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts Sun 19-Jun-16 12:22:36

and of course so many comments that are followed by "oh i dont mean people like you" that i cant even begin to list them!!

ALemonyPea Sun 19-Jun-16 12:23:00

Only special parents have special children

Oh bless him

I don't know how you do it, I couldn't cope

A few smacks should sort his behaviour out

Why don't you just medicate him?

BirthdayBetty Sun 19-Jun-16 12:23:03

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

MrsDeVere Sun 19-Jun-16 12:23:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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