It has just hit me that I won't have anymore children. I have ds 15mo who is healthy and happy and I know I should be grateful. I have pnd which means I know I will never have any more dc, I struggled so much in ds first few months, I would never put my family through that again. I love ds so so so much I would never want to jeopardise his future but I feel a tiny bit sad to know that I will never have any more kids.
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