...to want money for ruined mattress?

(41 Posts)
cupofrooibos Sat 18-Jun-16 21:34:41

Hi all, long time lurker but joined today specifically to post this dilemma.

Last night, I invited three friends back to ours for drinks after closing time at our local pub.

One of the friends is more of an acquaintance really, have known him for about ten years but only see him at friends' parties a couple of times a year and don't know him well enough to go for a drink on my own with him IYKWIM.

Anyway, he was really quite drunk. He went upstairs to use the loo but went into the spare room, threw up on the bed (red wine vomit confused) and then fell asleep. He was a dead weight but the rest of us stripped the bed around him and left him to sleep it off. I wasn't really happy about him staying (certainly wouldn't have invited him to stay!) but it was late and I just wanted to go to bed.

In the night he was sick again on the bare mattress.

This morning he was full of apologies and gave the mattress a good scrub. It's still badly stained though. As he left he asked for my bank details to transfer me money for a new mattress - his suggestion. I text him my bank details with links to a mattress (much, much cheaper than the Tempur one he ruined!) and the bedding which is expensive and very pale, so now badly stained and unusable.

The ruined mattress has only been slept on 4/5 times. If it's relevant, this is our first house and we've only been in since October, so most of our belongings are reasonably new and we're pretty house proud / territorial!

I've not had a reply to my text (12 hours ago) and a mutual friend has said I shouldn't bank on getting any money from him.

Have definitely learnt my lesson about hosting post-pub parties, but AIBU to have a) asked for the money, b) actually expect to receive some and c) chase him in a day or two?

specialsubject Sat 18-Jun-16 21:40:54

Twelve hours ? He's still pissed or sleeping it off.

Have a little patience, then phone in a day or so. Not all texts arrive.

BTW any accidental damage insurance? I agree this bloke is a disgusting skank and shouldn't cross your threshold again.

echelon Sat 18-Jun-16 21:45:27

Ewwwww!
Definitely chase him for it.why should you have to fork out to replace it?

12 hours isn't a long time though. I would give it until Monday.

Arkwright Sat 18-Jun-16 21:48:12

Can't you hire a carpet cleaner to try and clean it first? Cheaper than a new mattress. If you had left the sheets on it wouldn't have been so bad.

pearlylum Sat 18-Jun-16 21:52:36

You are "pretty houseproud and territorial" yet you allow a drunk man you hardly know to stay in your home? hmm

Not sure how old you are OP , chase up the money ,but chalk this up up as a life lesson.

TheWitTank Sat 18-Jun-16 21:53:03

I would leave it 24 hours and then text again if you haven't heard anything. He offered to pay (as anyone decent should!) so chasing him up isn't rude or pushy.

Coconutty Sat 18-Jun-16 21:54:15

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DailyFaily Sat 18-Jun-16 21:55:22

I wouldn't bother trying to clean it, it will have soaked through. Mattresses are expensive and maybe he didn't realise that when he offered - it's not the sort of money everyone has to hand. Do you have accidental damage in your house insurance? Frustrating but might be your best bet of getting the money.

cupofrooibos Sat 18-Jun-16 21:57:33

You're totally right pearlylum I've definitely learnt the lesson.

I'm not always the best at being forthright and tend towards avoiding conflict - so chucking someone out at 2am isn't something that'd come easy to me! It's also not a situation I've faced before confused and this is why I'm wondering if IBU to ask for the money at all. But I know that's something I need to work on.

Arkwright that's a good idea re carpet cleaner. We don't have carpets so it's not something I'd have thought of. Will investigate, thank you.

Haffdonga Sat 18-Jun-16 21:58:25

Chase after a week, not 12 hours.

CerseiHeartsJaime4ever Sat 18-Jun-16 21:59:16

No way would I leave a drunk person asleep on a new mattress even before they had been sick the first time. Esp not a Tempur one. I'd have booted him off to sleep on the floor on an old blanket!

cupofrooibos Sat 18-Jun-16 21:59:41

Will check the house insurance specialsubject and DailyFaily

cupofrooibos Sat 18-Jun-16 22:01:25

Won't be happening again Cersei that's for sure, have played hostess for the last time! grin

badg3r Sat 18-Jun-16 22:04:15

You can hire RugDoctors from big tesco stores. We did our mattress (baby vomit so a bit less gross!) and it worked really well. Good luck!

rookiemere Sat 18-Jun-16 22:08:41

Crikey - you have a temper mattress on your spare bed, you must be minted <misses point of thread entirely>

pearlylum Sat 18-Jun-16 22:09:23

OP don't beat yourself up. It has happened to me too ( also when I had my first home). It's a right of passage.
I don't have drunk people at my home, yes a few glasses of wine after a meal but then I help by calling taxis, earlier rather than later- meeting out, then everyone goes their own way home.

Having drunk friends over to "crash" after a night out is rarely a good idea.
Fine if you are a student living in digs and people don't mind sleeping on the carpet using a half eaten pizza in a box as a pillow, but when your home becomes your sanctuary then it's not nice to have it fouled.

cupofrooibos Sat 18-Jun-16 22:13:39

Ha! Sadly not rookiemere.

And thanks pearlylum it's just another lesson to learn. We've had plenty since buying the house smile

peasofcake Sat 18-Jun-16 22:13:50

I work for a insurance company and I would say your best bet is to try and get the mattress professionally cleaned. Try http://www.servicemasterclean.co.uk they are one of our suppliers. Your insurer isn't going to just replace it without an attempted clean as it is vomit ( I don't think) other end is auto deemed unsanitary I think. Sheets soak in napisan in the bath and then machine wash.
Hope you get it sorted x

MyMurphy Sat 18-Jun-16 22:20:05

My DH kindly rescued a very drunk member of his staff that couldn't get into her house as she had lost her key (Staff night out). As she was so paralytic he brought her back to ours and put her on our settee. He woke to me up to tell me that he had brought her back, so we both slept downstairs on sofas in case she needed loo, threw up etc. In the morning he ran her home (where she found a hidden key!). When he got back, we discovered that she had weed on my sofa!! We were not impressed, never got an apology but the firm paid for a new sofa for us!

nooka Sat 18-Jun-16 22:20:11

I'd also look to get mattress protectors in the future. We got them with our new bed and I seem to recall it came with some sort of replacement guarantee.

cupofrooibos Sat 18-Jun-16 22:24:36

peasofcake that link is really helpful - thank you. There is one fairly local so will give them a call. Would rather not have the hassle of sorting insurance so if I can fix it myself I will!

MyMurphy that is HORRIFIC! shock some people are so brazen. Glad you got a new sofa!

TooMuchMNTime Sat 18-Jun-16 22:27:38

Id give him time, chase in a couple of days
I can imagine people telling him that he should only pay for the linen and the specialist cleaning though
But I totally get why you want a new one

Do you think you'd feel the same if a close friend did this? I ask because I can imagine he will think of that...

cupofrooibos Sat 18-Jun-16 22:32:51

TooMuchMNTime to be honest this morning I was so stressed about the mess I didn't even consider the prospect of having it cleaned professionally, haven't needed to think about this sort of thing, but would be perfectly happy with him paying for it to be cleaned.

It's a good point re whether I'd ask a close friend. Probably not, but then again a close friend wouldn't have passed out uninvited, or I'd at least know them well enough to predict drunken accidents and provide sleeping arrangements as appropriate smile I'm annoyed that he stayed without being invited and that's likely colouring my view of things.

passingthrough1 Sat 18-Jun-16 22:36:21

When I owe people money (newer anything like your scenario!) I usually just transfer the money in and don't necessarily confirm it via text also. Just keep an eye on your account for a few days. Definitely can't chase so soon.

lookbeforeyouleap Sat 18-Jun-16 22:37:50

Also note that if you call your insurance and ask they will record it as an incident even if you don't claim and you will have to declare it in future insurance applications. It will possibly put your insurance up.

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