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To add DPs name on a card?

(40 Posts)
Mumstudentbum Sat 18-Jun-16 15:38:17

Every year on Father's Day, Mother's Day etc I sign a card from me, DP and the Dcs

This year when writing a Father's Day card DP said I was being ridiculous putting him and the Dcs on the card as he wasn't their father. I asked if he ever put out names in his mum or dads cards and he said no.

Am ibu to think it's nice for the card to come from us as a family?

TheNaze73 Sat 18-Jun-16 15:39:24

YANBU but, I see his point

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Sat 18-Jun-16 15:41:04

I don't think you're unreasonable to think it's nice, but I don't think your DP is wrong either.

In our household Mothers' Day and Fathers' Day cards are only signed by the individual.

allnewredfairy Sat 18-Jun-16 15:42:24

I only put my own name on mothers/fathers day cards.

NicknameUsed Sat 18-Jun-16 15:48:58

OH and I only have one parent left between us - his mum. Birthday and Christmas cards come from us as a family. Mothering Sunday cards come from him because she is his mother, not mine or DD's.

Caffeinator Sat 18-Jun-16 15:50:28

I don't think either way is BU but I wouldn't say it's ridiculous. I only sign them from myself and DP signs them from both but I wouldn't say he's being ridiculous for it.

pollyblack Sat 18-Jun-16 15:52:19

I only put my own name on my fathers day card to my dad.

WaxyBean Sat 18-Jun-16 15:54:56

I sign from all of us. No idea what DH does for his parents.

NotYoda Sat 18-Jun-16 16:06:14

it's not technically correct to do what you do, but i wouldn't make a point of mentioning it if i were your dp

Is he a bit of a pedant?

or does he secretly not like your Father wink

Also, everyone knows (presumably) he's not your children's dad, why draw attention to that? He's still part of your family.


sirfredfredgeorge Sat 18-Jun-16 16:10:53

Because he didn't know you did it, YABU, there's nothing inherently wrong with signing it from him (although I think it's a bit weird). You were signing it without his knowledge, what if he didn't want to express the sentiment at all, it's just wrong to sign someone else's name to something without their knowledge.

growlerisnotaporkpie Sat 18-Jun-16 16:12:43

we used to sign it individually, but once we got married and they became in -laws we sign it from all of us

HeffalumpHistory Sat 18-Jun-16 16:15:02

I sign from us all and must admit I made a bit of a thing to DP a couple of years ago when he didn't put my name on his mums birthday card. I come up with the ideas, but the present, but the card, remind him of the day then it looks like I don't give a shit when he gives it all from him? hmm
I know the general consensus on here is you only do to your parents but I think it's nice to do from both of us.
DC get a Grandpa/Grandma card of their own which ds puts his & baby's names in

fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 18-Jun-16 16:17:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mumstudentbum Sat 18-Jun-16 16:19:35

The truth is I've never even thought of it before I've just always signed from all of us. I'm not particularly bothered he doesn't put my name on the card I just wondered what other people do,

He gets along fine with my dad (probs better than I do) so he wasn't offended because he doesn't like him he just thought it was weird. Although he doesn't particularly like my mother so really couldn't care less there lol

MitzyLeFrouf Sat 18-Jun-16 16:25:49


I'd only put my own name on a Fathers' Day card to my Dad. Because he's my Dad.

StillRabbit Sat 18-Jun-16 16:50:20

I wrote cards to DF and DFIL and signed both from all of us. My name first on my dads card, his name first on his dad's card. We both call each other's Dads "dad" anyway and my FIL sends me 'daughter' birthday cards as he says I am as good as a real daughter to him.

Blacksquirrel Sat 18-Jun-16 18:23:56

I sign from all of us.

He's my dad but also FIL to DH & Grandad to our they equally should wish him a happy father's day

eyebrowsonfleek Sat 18-Jun-16 18:29:31

My local card shop sell Father's Day cards aimed at step-fathers, grandfathers and husbands.

The first two make sense as those two groups sometimes do father-y things like childcare, playing etc and I guess the last is for spouses who are proud of their husband's performance as a father.

If your dad is heavily involved with your children, he might deserve a Grandfather card? I think that makes more sense than adding their names to your card.

SeamstressfromTreacleMineRoad Sat 18-Jun-16 19:42:15

DIL calls me 'Mum' and DH 'Dad' (her choice - we would have been happy for her to still call us 'Fred and Elsie' not real names but she said that she'd like to call us 'Mum and Dad'). This being the case, I'd feel really upset to receive a Mother's Day card with just DS's name on it... smile
DD's DP calls us 'Fred and Elsie' - but she still puts his name on our cards, and that seems fine to us. Guess it shows that we're all different... hmm

iwanttobeahippy Sun 19-Jun-16 23:08:08

I bought the cards and gifts for my dad and dps dad and signed them from both of us,my name first on my dads and dps name first on his dads and i bought happy fathers day grandad cards from our ds. We've been together for 12 years so we do think of each others parents as our own in a way(if that makes sense?) I do this with all cards.

BeYourselfUnlessUCanBeAUnicorn Sun 19-Jun-16 23:13:41

I only sign from me, it's not from DH or the DCs. I wouldnt want him to put mine or DCs names on MIL card either, I'm their mum and she's not mine. Birthday and Christmas cards are different obviously.

2catsnowaiting Sun 19-Jun-16 23:20:37

We put both our names on Fathers' day greetings. My kids always make cards for both grandfathers too. It's just saying Happy Fathers' Day and the person being sent it is a father. I don't see that it matters whose father they are. We are all sending our love and appreciation that that person is in our lives.

Jengnr Mon 20-Jun-16 06:16:51

Every year I wonder what to do with this and I think I do it differently every year smile

branofthemist Mon 20-Jun-16 06:23:30

I put everyone's name on all cards. No idea why. But we all love my parents so why not?

Don't know what dhs does. Either way I am not bothered.

TheCrumpettyTree Mon 20-Jun-16 06:48:14

I only put my name on mother's day cards because my DM is my mum. Dh does the same with his cards. They're his parents, not mine.

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