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To think DH should sort his own passport?

(94 Posts)
rusmus Sun 12-Jun-16 17:25:06

I booked our hols in Feb. We are going away for a week in late August, and we need passports. Mine and the DS/DDs are in date. DH's expired in May. When I booked it, I said he needed to make sure he sorted out his passport as wouldn't it be awful if he couldn't come, hahahaha?
It is now June. I have reminded him, sent emails with links to the site, got the forms from the Post Office.
I have not done it for him. I just don't want to. I do a lot of stuff for the family and that's fine because it need to be done. He does the car insurance/ MOT/servicing. And I think he should sort out his own sodding passport. AIBU??

KissMyArse Sun 12-Jun-16 17:33:57


I fucking hate filling in passport application forms, they give me the rage. Never managed to get one passed first time as of yet.

He'd better get his skates on, this is a very busy time for passport applications.

dementedpixie Sun 12-Jun-16 17:35:56

You don't even need the paper forms as they can be filled in online. He better get his skates on and get it done

rusmus Sun 12-Jun-16 17:37:08

When I did my DD, I made a mistake on each form I did, approx 400 it felt like. He will do it too late and the passport will arrive the day after we have flown ( oh yes, I am still going!).
Why is he SO lazy? Or should I do it because my children will be so disappointed not to have their dad there?

Wolfiefan Sun 12-Jun-16 17:38:21

If he can't go because he didn't apply for a passport then let him deal with upsetting his kids.
And hell yes you go!!

NavyAndWhite Sun 12-Jun-16 17:42:05


Is he at work all day? Do you work all day?

DoreenLethal Sun 12-Jun-16 17:44:05

Is he at work all day? Do you work all day?

What has this got to do with it?

Unless he works 24 hours a day 7 days a week, he is more than likely to get time to sort his own passport out.

KatharinaRosalie Sun 12-Jun-16 17:44:41

YANBU. His passport, his problem. If he was really busy and kindly asked if you could help, you probably would, right? But no excuses if he's simply ignoring the issue.

NavyAndWhite Sun 12-Jun-16 17:44:41

What do you think it has got to do with it?

rusmus Sun 12-Jun-16 17:44:45

Yes I work and so does he. I managed to do 3 passports whilst at work ( and I don't have an office job so I don't have regular access to a phone/ computer). It seems petty when I type it, but I just don't want to do it. It's as if I have a 3rd child.
Yes he does work full time- he's an accountant

isharewifinotsextoys Sun 12-Jun-16 17:45:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland Sun 12-Jun-16 17:46:35

'Is he at work all day? Do you work all day?'

So going to work all day gives you a Get Out of Life free pass? Well, bugger me!! I worked all day for decades and still managed to sort my own adult passport! I should have made someone else do it for me as my paid lackey.


You can do it online. He's an adult. In fact, if someone else completes the paperwork, it has to be signed off.

I would remind him one more time and tell him, it's YOUR job to sort it. You don't and we'll go without you.

NavyAndWhite Sun 12-Jun-16 17:46:59

Do none of you believe in helping your husbands out?

If the OP is at work all day then I'd say that he should do it.

But say for instance in this house where DH works full time and I don't, you would sort his passport out for him.

He'd do the same for me thankfully.

Donatellalymanmoss Sun 12-Jun-16 17:47:20

Of course he should do his own passport. If he can't come then it'll teach him not to be such a lazy fucker.

Donatellalymanmoss Sun 12-Jun-16 17:48:04

And even if you were a SAHM he should still do his own passport.

MaltyCocoa Sun 12-Jun-16 17:48:09

I get this op

My DH has promised me that he will get important documents done before a certain time. He doesn't (despite me sending him link and giving him the paperwork and doing everything other than signing the bloody thing)

It's purely selfish and lazy. He doesn't care about the family goals

And one of many reasons I am now in the process of leaving him

rusmus Sun 12-Jun-16 17:48:10

I think the main underlying issue here is that he tends to ignore this until the very last minute and then we both end up rushing around to sort it out. Eg he has had 4 years to get his chartered accountant status. The 4 years is up in August 2016. If he doesn't complete the paperwork, the 18 exams he did, and passed first time, will become null and void and he will be unqualified and will have to start again.
Sorry to drip feed.

Donatellalymanmoss Sun 12-Jun-16 17:49:22

I help my DH out in many ways, one of which is reminding him he's an adult with responsibilities and that I'm his wife not his PA/ Slave.

NavyAndWhite Sun 12-Jun-16 17:49:23

Nah. It's team work. DH owns his own company. He has a lot of deadlines to meet.

I run the house but have a fair bit of free time. I would think of myself as a huge twat if I said that he had to sort his own passport out.

Arfarfanarf Sun 12-Jun-16 17:49:34

Why has he said he hasnt bothered doing it?

Is he angling for a relaxing break at home while you wrestle the kids on holiday? grin grin

rusmus Sun 12-Jun-16 17:51:02

Ishare - and I completely understand that point of view. I should be happy to do this for him but, without listing the things I have happily sorted out over the years, I am slowly coming to the realisation that I am always sorting things out for him/ the kids, whereas he does things for himself - the car for example.

Donatellalymanmoss Sun 12-Jun-16 17:51:14

rusmus let him start again with the accountancy exams I cannot be doing with adults who don't grasp that you have to take responsibility for your own shit.

rusmus Sun 12-Jun-16 17:52:01

And obviously I am happy to sort things for the children, that's what I'm here for until they can manage for themselves

AugustaFinkNottle Sun 12-Jun-16 17:53:43

I think in many respects it's easier to do that sort of thing from an office than from home. You don't have children pestering round you or people coming to the door, and you've got things like photocopiers and scanners easily available if you need them.

Your DH presumably manages to organise himself for his clients when they have deadlines, so it really shouldn't be difficult to set aside half an hour when it's quiet to get the passport done. And he's probably wasted more time than that just listening to you pestering!

Donatellalymanmoss Sun 12-Jun-16 17:53:57

navyandewhite you wouldn't be a twat if your husband was a lazy cunt who expected you to do shit he's perfectly capable of. I hope your DH appreciates you, personally I can't be doing with men who think their responsibilities stop at the office door.

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