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Chores for 13 yr old? Aibu?

(9 Posts)
TiffanyblueX Sun 12-Jun-16 17:21:54

My dd seems to think it's way too much to ask her to wash up n sort out her own clothes as far as putting them in the washing machine / putting clean clothes away etc.. I think this is pretty normal in fact I'd like her to do more.. My younger dd is forever asking me for chores to do. But my older one gets ridiculously aggressive and put out when asked to do anything and I think she does things like washing up badly on purpose! Then I end up doing it anyway. I want to teach her responsibility and pride in her home but is it worth the arguments? What is a reasonable amount of chores for a 13 yr old to do?

wonkylegs Sun 12-Jun-16 17:29:01

Our 8yo DS has an activity chart which includes chores on it so on days when he has a lot on he may do less chores and days he does nothing slightly more. He has to do the chores/ music practice etc to get screen time onthe weekend.
Everyday he has to make his bed, put his dirty clothes in washing basket, breakfast dishes in dishwasher and cereal away, dinner dishes in dishwasher. Then a couple of times a week he puts the compost out, helps empty the dishwasher/ washing machine, puts away his clean clothes, waters plants, tidies playroom and helps put the shopping away after weekly shop
He doesn't do his own washing as I bung everything in together to minimise number of washes.

Lweji Sun 12-Jun-16 17:39:53

My 11 year old ds sets the table, puts his own stuff in the dishwasher and takes his dirty clothes to the laundry bin. He will put them away is asked, but I don't do it often. He helps with shopping and occasionally pops to the local supermarket himself. He's happy to help out when necessary, but I expect 13 is another thing altogether.

Wolfiefan Sun 12-Jun-16 17:42:16

13 year old boy.
Keep room tidy for me to hoover.
Dirty clothes in laundry basket.
Help clear dinner table after meals.
Dirty plates and cups in dishwasher.
Clean clothes sorted and put away. (Just his)
That's about it really.

Fairylea Sun 12-Jun-16 17:43:17

My dd is 13 and she is expected to bring her clothes downstairs to the wash bin and to put her clean clothes away (I leave them on her bed in a pile). She changes the kitchen bin after dinner each day and helps unload the dishwasher with me. Once a week I hand her a duster and polish and she cleans her room. She never complains about any of it, she just sees it as contributing to the house. She also helps me change her sheets once a week.

Nanny0gg Sun 12-Jun-16 17:43:48

When my DC were 13 they did their own ironing too! (only on MN is ironing a heinous crime!)

Waitingfordolly Sun 12-Jun-16 18:27:14

YABU to even think of asking her to do anything at all as it might interfere with her constant need to send selfies to her friends on Snapchat, do you not realise that she has so many other important things to do that she can't possibly do any chores? No, sorry, I was channelling my 13 y.o. DD there, YANBU but I can't get mine to do much. She'll sometimes throw uneaten food in the bin and put a plate in the dishwasher (but normally just on the kitchen surface) and she does put some dirty clothes in the washing bin, although the rest end up around the house on the floor under damp towels. We did have a phase of her being more useful, but that seems to have disappeared, so at the moment I just suck it up and do things myself whilst also knowing that I am setting a bad example and not really helping her in the long term, and vowing that at some point I will tackle the issue properly.

SecretNutellaFix Sun 12-Jun-16 18:45:51

By 13 she should be well on the way to being capable of cooking a simple meal for the family, and clearing up after herself and keeping her possessions tidy and in good repair- this includes washing her clothes and putting them away when they are dry, plus keeping her room clean and tidy including running the hoover over the floor.

JustMarriedBecca Sun 12-Jun-16 19:07:59

My 33 year old husband doesn't put his socks in the laundry bin but rather on top of it. Do you think a reward chart might work before I batter him?

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