To feel like I'm about to completely break down(14 Posts)
Name changed as all this is identifiable to anyone who knows me.
Honestly I don't know how much more I can cope with this week at all.
I'm 6 1/2 months pregnant and have a child with severe complex needs.
On Sunday I got a bad electric shock. Had to go into hospital to be checked out and have the babies movements monitored and to be checked out. Luckily all fine but was scary.
Monday on the way home from school run a drunk driver swerving all over the road behind me swerved and crashes head on into a car on the other side of the road, swerved back and misses the back end of my car by inches, if I hadn't sped up and swerved she would have hit us. DS was scared into a massive seizure and ended up being blue lighted into hospital. Luckily he stabilised and we could go home.
An hour after we get home his lymph node in his neck swells to the size of a golf ball and end up in the out of hours doctors in the middle of the night getting antibiotics. I get zero sleep all night.
Tuesday morning the estate stray is lay in my garden with half the skin on his head hanging off so I have to rush him I showered to the vets, seriously ill DS in tow. And do a drop and run as fast as I can after ringing and explaining the situation beforehand.
Later on DSs neck swells even more, and his skin turns yellow. Call the GP and she sends him off for blood tests instantly because she thinks he is having a severe reaction to his new medication. So I sit up worrying all night again.
Today I wake up with severe lower back pins and having painful contractions every 15 minutes. Ring the midwife and ring back. All ok she thinks but it's so painful, and I couldn't go in even if I wanted to because I have DS with me.
There's also been a couple of problems with somewhere I volunteer with. Think one person being a dick and everyone else getting upset, which I've had to deal with remotely.
Add to that the fact that I'm completely on my own, and already feeling a bit overwhelmed with it all.
I've just had a massive cry and feel like I'm completely useless. I have no one to talk to. My best friend who I go to with stuff like this has just had terrible news so I can't even turn to him right now.
And I can't even have a wine!
Do you have any respite support for your child? Are there any charities that could support you. I think homestart provides volunteers to visit a family at home to help out with whatever they needed doing. I don't know if they still do this.
Do you have friends/family nearby? I hope things get better for you soon.
Yeah we have 3 hours a week which is the most anyone gets here to be honest.
Home start is something we have had before at the people we had were, to be frank, worse than useless, they ended up causing more hassle than if they weren't there at all.
One of the women who came watched my DS go into meltdown (caused by her, he rarely ever does this as he's so placid) and started slagging off him and other children she works with who 'go mad like that' while I dealt with everything anyway. There were others as well but they were also useless so we gave up with that.
I have friends, no one super close apart from one who's going through his own stuff right now, everyone else is sort of 'have a gossip' friends and they're lovely and I'm lucky to have them. But I feel like all I've done recently is moan to them constantly and I don't want to carry on with that.
There's nothing anyone can do I just needed a vent.
I'm so sorry. That all sounds so stressful. You can't have wine. Whine here (although you sound very strong and not a moaner like me!!!) and wine to celebrate safe arrival in a few months!
Vent away it's what mumsnet is for. My dc has ASC & there are days I could cry when he lashes out. People stand and judge but don't realise that he's hurting too. Some weeks are just craps and you need a moan.
I've joked with my friend that she is to bring wine into the hospital as soon as I give birth after the months I've been having (obviously I can't anyway as I'm going to try to BF, but it's nice to dream)
I am scared about the birth because DSs birth was so bad. Emergency C section is an option and I'm going to talk it through with my consultant next week but from what I've been reading they'll only give you the date at 36 weeks which will mean I won't have enough time to get someone to book days off to care for DS!
So I'm all over the place with that too
But if you just go into spontaneous labour you will also need a plan. What about the father?
DSs dad says he will be 100% available to help but he works pretty far away. So he would need notice to get days off booked. He's been brilliant along with his partner.
Babies dad wasn't one of my best decisions. But I only found that out when it was way too late.
So glad DS dad can help. Could DS stay there for a few days when you will be due.
Not one of my best decisions?! We've all done that!!!
I meant elective c section not emergency. My heads all over the place
I'm not surprised! Just wondered if DS can stay with dad for a few days and you can have section in that window. You may need help afterbirth too.
Well DSs dad asked his work and they said he can take 3 days unpaid leave for the birth. But would have to book in advance! So basically he could take the three days and then not be any use unless I go for a c section. Which given DSs birth I want to. But if they only book it so late he might not be able to get the time off
Massive pain. Didn't actually think about it. I pictured a serene home birth with DS pottering about the place until they scared me with facts.
I have help after birth 😊 I'm very lucky. There's just no one else I can leave DS with given his needs. But if I'm there to bark instructions in the event of an emergency it'll be fine
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